Made a bit of a show of myself!! Help!

Hi all, I think I just need some empathy so I dont feel like an idiot! Ive had 3 ops so far and after my last treatment of zoladex my problems have returned. After being in a lot of pain recently I asked my doctor to refer me back to my consultant. I wasnt sure if to see the one i've seen before because even though I rate her as a surgeon I dont find her easy to talk to and sometimes quite dismissive. She once said she thought I was depressed and the stress wasn't helping my pain management (errr hello its the pain thats making me stressed and depressed!!) I was feeling quite nervous yesterday but thought I was ok this morning and thought I'd be able to articulate myself relatively well. Anyway I went to my appointment this morning and after waiting for 45 minutes I checked with reception if I was next (this is a private appointment not nhs) Apparently I had been missed and my consultant had somehow just seen the people who were after me and id got left out. The consultant came out and said to me that she couldnt see me today now as she was too busy. ....... I burst into tears!!! In the waiting room which was full! I rushed out the hospital as I couldnt speak, ignoring the consultant. One of the staff came after me and asked me to go back in and a very kind nurse spoke to me and apologised (although it wasnt her fault). The consultant came in too and I felt a bit stupid she said she would see me another time. After speaking to the nurse we decided that Id see someone else so she is going to ring me and book me in with someone else hopefully this week. I have been in so much pain I just wanted the appointment, not sure where my outburst came from but I now feel quite embarrassed and just needed to share I think. x

14 Replies

  • Hi Jules

    The only silliness you've shown is in being embarrassed about what happened at the hospital - you reacted perfectly normally! :)

    It's interesting that the nurse was lovely with you and made you an appointment to see somebody else...I wonder whether the consultant you were supposed to be seeing has a record of this sort of thing??

    Stop worrying about it. You'd built yourself up to it and were badly let down. Let it go, and wait for the lovely nurse to ring you.

    Lots of love, Chrissie xxx

  • Hi I agree with Chrissie, you shouldnt even bother to feel embarrassment after what they did.

    It was their fault and they had to see you in between the other appointments.

    Make sure that you call the nurse back in case they havent contacted you within a few days.

    Jo x

  • Totally agree honey - it's a normal reaction to a rubbish situation. I had a similar thing happen when I went for my first prostap and waited an hour to be told they wouldn't pay for it!

    Really hope they get you booked in soon - remember it's them that is in the wrong, not you x

  • Thanks all for your kind words. I think it was partly due to the fact that she said previously I was anxious, I didn't want her just passing me off as neurotic, it's hard enough to be taken seriously at the best of times unfortunately. The nurse did say the other consultant is very nice which I took to mean my usual one isn't by the way she said it! They've called back already and I'm going this Thursday 9am, I'm first in so shouldn't be any issues this time.

    Thanks again for taking the time to respond, It really does help.

    Jules xx

  • The only person that made a show of herself was the consultant by messing your appointment up! It is hardly surprising you were upset! Good luck on Thursday

  • Don't be embarrassed. You've got enough to deal with without worrying about things like this. The consultant sounds like a bit of a cow so maybe it'll work out a blessing in disguise that you find a different one. Good luck and take care

  • Hi Jules

    I totally understand how you feel. Dealing with Endo on a daily basis does make you feel vulnerable and very emotional at times it does for me anyway. Being in pain and waiting for an appointment to come around can be very stressful and then to be dismissed like that I would've reacted exactly the same. I'm so glad you had lovely nurses to help you through it. Good luck on Thursday I hope your new consultant helps you.


  • I didn't know it was possible to have an appointment without weeping all the way through it anyway.I can't discuss being in pain without crying my eyes out !!!!!Every single time i go i burst in tears so don't worry love,we're all the same and the hospital will be used to it,And you had good reason to be upset i would of been hysterical! Well done for not throwing yourself on the floor and kicking your legs love.xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    Good luck with your next appointment.x

  • hi Jules, no embarrassment needed on your part my dear - although tears dripped off my face whole way through last gynae appointment so i know how u feel - and again the nurse was far better at handling situation than doc! it was a set back in what you hoped was a step towards getting better but now your have a nurse on your side and i'm sure she'll move u to best doc available after their mistake. hope you hear from them soon with a new appointment xx

  • Thanks everyone for your responses. I was back today, the nurse asked me straight away if I was ok, when I got in to see the doc there was a jug of water and tissues on the desk - I think they were prepared this time lol. The new doctor was really nice and we talked through my history. Ive got an ultra sound on Tuesday (which I know isnt necessarily going to show anything) and she discussed with me the mirena (i think it is) coil which hasnt been mentioned to me before. I have another appointment with the doctor a week today to discuss if there is anything showing on the ultra sound scan and take it all from there. I feel better about it now (the appointment side of it all anyway).

    Thanks again, it really helped. xx

  • hun i really feel for you. the pain and stress of endo makes me really emotional too and ive cried more times than i care to remember in the GP and consulting rooms. i think its only natural and hopefully it will help them see how badly you need this resolved. dont ever worry about what they think because its your feelings that matter not theirs. she should not have been so dismissive. i would be upset in nhs never mind if i paid for it. i dont think they realise how much we psychologically have to gear up and prepare for each appointment. you are maybe try and take someone with you next time? i have to go on my own most of the time and i find it helps to at least have a friend to have coffee with or something and just vent. really hope you get it sorted... xxx

  • p.s. love the comment about the water and the tissues :) so they should be! xx

  • pps. if you want to ask any questions about the mirena, i have this for treatment of endo xx

  • Its been confirmed that I am going in for another lap on next wednesday (21st) as the scan did show endo and also adenomyosis. (although have been told this cannot be removed as its in the muscle). They are also going to fit the mirena coil which I have mixed feelings about but figure its certainly worth trying something new as I seem to be running out of things to try!

    Thanks for all your support ladies. x

    im330 I will message you thank you as it would be good to hear off someone who has first hand experience instead of just the medical info.

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