I am seeing the gyno tomorrow but I am terrified. I am 15, virgin, have never inserted anything into me (yes, even tampons) and know the gyno will most likely do a pelvic exam where she inserts 2 fingers to check for abnormalities. I know that 'its a fact of life' but this is the one thing I dread. Trust me, I have done more tests than I can count and have gotten over the initial fear but this is different. I have never been abused but thanks to the media and stories I am absolutely terrified of being assaulted myself. I fear sex, I fear masturbation and I certainly fear doctors having to go down there. I have tried to insert things to prepare myself for the appointment before but it is so painful and I can not go anywhere. Once my GP thought I had thrush so prescribed me thrush cream which involves having to insert an applicator into you and that was a nightmare. I thought that I didn't even have a vagina because I could physically not make the applicator enter, I read that it may be because of my hymen so that only scared me more about the appointment knowing pain will be involved. I have already had an ultrasound to check for ovarian cysts so is this really necessary? I have had panic attacks for months over this dreaded appointment and honestly know that I will most likely run out the room the moment I see the exam chair/bed. My mum has tried everything to calm my nerves but there just is no point I am literally freaking out over this.
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