Recovery from a Laproscopy....getting back to normal

Hi Everyone,

I'm seeking some advice/ experience from those who are further down the line than I am. I had a Laproscopy 2 months ago and despite numerous phone calls to my hospital I have received nadda from them... The advice is around post-sex discomfort but I'll explain my story below as it may help shape advice.

I've recovered well, besides a first very painful period (it's usually just painful) and then a bout of thrush and some weird discharge. I found out after the lap that I have endo on one of the ligaments connecting my uterus and back together, and a retroverted uterus (I've since done a lot of Google-ing of the medical terms in my discharge notes - which was about 3 sentences long). To be honest, it doesn't give much away and I've mainly been reading info online, but it doesn't do much for a leave of mind!!

I guess to back pedal, A brief history, around 2 years ago I went to the doctors after I started experiencing painful sex to the point where I really could not handle much intimacy. My partner and I have now been together around 4 years, he was my first sexual partner too and has been so, so supportive throughout the past few years!

After repeatedly going to the docs, I finally got a referral (after trying difference pills and pretty much no sex life). My first experience was not great, after several excruciatingly painful internal exams and not much progress I was still at a loss until I moved house and got a new consultant - who was AMAZING - we quickly started moving towards a lap but first I had to tackle vaginismus. The past few years have been really tough, I'm only in my mid-twenties, was a year or so out of uni, in a great relationship but these gyno problems hung over me and I really struggled to talk to friends about them. Once I finally did, my friends were so supportive and I've found reading forums like this extremely useful!

After the lap, I've since been cleared from psychosexual counselling for the vaginismus and healed from the lap (with some pretty decent scars!). We're beginning to get a sex life back, which is really nice and it's great to have some level of intimacy again. I believe having the coil put in has helped tremendously with most of the internal dryness and sex drive in general. All in all, some good steps forward :-D

This is the part I'd love some advice on - after sex my tummy is so uncomfortable for days I'll have a stabbing pain in my lower abdomen, an achy back and bloated tummy. I've been taking painkillers and ibroprohen when the pain is too much (which is daily at the moment) but it has started to really affect my concentration at work. However, I dont really want to be taking painkillers frequently (I enjoy a glass of vino every now and again!)..... I have a microwaveable bear which I use at night or at home which has varying success. Does anyone have any tips or tricks to help with the after pain?

Thanks for any advice, I know it's asking a lot but, since I haven't had any follow up letters or appointments with my consultant (it's a new one, my old one left) and have no idea when it'll be, if ever at this rate, I'm terrified of going back to a relationship with low intimacy and vaginismus, we've only just got it back!

4 Replies

  • Hi, I'm just under 2 months post lap and sex before used to hurt too - like being poked hard in a bruise repeatedly! . I've found sex after my lap now doesn't hurt (although i'm still not relaxed as i'm worried it will). However I too get a dose of 'period pains' afterwards that lasts for a day or so. I've not mentioned these to my partner as i don't want to disappoint him and I'm hoping it because we're still healing inside so it will eventually stop.

    No advice re pain management - I pretty much do what you do.


  • Hi H,

    It's such a pain isn't it? I'm glad we're all doing the same thing to be honest. I haven't got a follow up appointment so can't even ask a consultant if they know of any tips and tricks! Yeah totally, my sister (who's a nurse) said it can take up to a year for your body to properly heal :-O which seems like a crazy amount of time....!

    For relaxing my psychosexual counsellor (for vaginismus) recommended sex toys, which maybe worth a shot! But also cleaning out any electronic items like TV, Phones and tablets from the bedroom - this actually worked surprisingly well for us as I used the TV to avoid intimacy at night. Just gets you talking and more relaxed as well.


  • You've just described me! Vaginismus, low libido, painful sex, no intimacy.. It's horrible. Been with my partner 8 years and had problems for about 7. I had vaginal Botox for the vaginismus and a laparoscopy yesterday but the lap found no endo so I'm not really sure what's causing so much pain inside.

    Sorry I can't offer much help but just wanted to say you're not alone.

  • Hey,

    No, no, just hearing that someone else has been through a very similar experience is helpful enough! Your partner sounds amazing,miss such a long time to deal with these issues! Are you healing okay?

    Hopefully you'll get a follow up to discuss what could be going on? Have you heard from the hospital?

    I did find changing from the pill to the coil helped massively with labido. I still get pain during sex but it's far less then before and once or twice - no pain during! Felt like a massive achievement! Ha! Hopefully thinks will progress well for you over the next months or so.

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