This is more of a rant than a cry for help so please forgive me.
I have just about had my fill of this rubbish. I am in so much pain all the time. In fact I don't even remember my last pain free day. I have been given numerous pain killers but what with their side effects and the delightful endo I haven't been able to empty my bowels fully for over two weeks, in fact probably longer and when I do it is a pathetic amount and so painful it makes my eyes water and often tears a fissure and bleeds. I am drinking lactulose like its juice and taking senna daily, drinking well over 2 litres of water a day eating almost nothing but fruit and veg but still no relief. I have cut back on the painkillers in order to help move things along but as a result I am in more pain than is necessary.
Working is a daily struggle and when I do make it I am too tired to function most of the time. My employer is not the most understanding and I don't feel like I can talk to them about my health problems but I feel like I spend more time at the Drs surgery than I do at home which they do not appreciate. I have a hot water bottle permanently attached to either my back or my tummy which leads to most of my colleagues questioning me.
Every time I go to the Drs he looks at me as if I am some sort of medical enigma and I am sick of feeling so tired and pathetic all the time. I don't want to go out with friends due to pain. I suffer with depression and this is making it worse. I have an appointment at an endo clinic next month and I am pretty much relying entirely on this one Dr to finally put an end to this....well for the time being at least.
You all know how lonely this can make you feel and this forum is such a comfort when you spend your days surrounded by people (including medical professionals) who don't understand how life limiting it can feel.
Sorry ladies, thanks for reading, rant over.