Scared and fed up

I'm currently undiagnosed with lower back and pelvic pain on and off, irregular (amd sometimes extremely prolonged) periods, ibs type symptoms especially around my period, pain during sex on and off and a host of.other things. I received a date for my laparoscopy a week ago and its 23 July. The thing is I really wanted a lap to find out if its Endo but now I have the date I've realised I'm actually freaking out about it. I've never had any kind of general anaesthetic before and I didn't even like having gas and air when I had my 2 kids because I don't like feeling out of control of my body so being put under is really playing on my mind. On told of that I realised I'm really scared they'll find Endo but also really scared they won't and I'll be back to square one. On top of that I have a lump in my abdomen just under my right rib which the doctor things may be a hernia so they said they can take a look while they're in there and I'm stupidly scared they find out its something horrible. I know its silly to worry and the best thing is to have the lap done and hopefully get some answers but I'm worried silly about it and its really playing on my mind. Sorry for such a long post and theres no point to it really other than the fact saying it makes me feel a little better at least :s xx

3 Replies

  • I know exactly how you feel, my first lap was done as an emergency and I was under a heart specialist and hadn't been able to have an op for weeks then in about the space of 10 mins (no joke) they said I'd be ok before giving figures to me about the anaesthetics which freaked me even more. By the time I got to theatres and they started being nice to me I was in tears!! Having had two more since I can honestly say the pain in my shoulders was worse than the op itself. Just remember its a huge deal for us but to them it's the equivalent of us writing a report or filling in a form, it's just part of their normal stuff. Good luck x

  • Hi, I know this feeling, but please do try your best to be strong and positive. I have never had surgery before and I'm due my surgery to remove my cysts, I was terrified but the more I talked about it to people, the better I feel about it. I was told initially my left side cyst was abnormal sized, and at first they said they wanted to make sure its not a tumour. I was really scared and in a way still am that they will find something else. However I know from what the gyno said from my MRI and ultrasounds that she is confident it is nothing bad. I just have to trust being in her hands. The whole process has been very scary for me but I'm learning to just try be at peace with it.

    It's okay to feel scared, nervous and anxious AND if there are days you want to cry just do it! but make sure you always have a circle of support of friends or family to talk to. Talk about your fears openly. Yes, any surgery is very scary, but try get your mind used to the fact that you will be in good hands and after this surgery you're a step ahead to trying to fix the problem & feel better. If it is Endo then there are ways to help you to deal with it and you will be fine.

    Keep your mind positive and try engage in some time everyday where you can relax(medicate or yoga) I found this has helped me so much and I'm so calm about things now.

    Wishing you the best for everything and I think whatever the outcome you will be strong enough to deal with it.


  • Hi there

    This is my first time commenting on here! You sound exactly like me...I've just had my first laparoscopy last Friday and was petrified as never had an anaesthetic before! (And I'm an ex-nurse too!!!). All my symptoms sound like yours. I was dreading a diagnosis of endometriosis but am now left feeling pretty frustrated as there was no evidence of it to be seen!!! All of these symptoms definately aren't in my head that's for sure!! He fitted a Mirena whilst I was in there and is now assuming it could be adenomyosis which is similar but is located in the muscle of the uterus and is difficult to diagnose (he says it's usually done post-hysterectomy in the lab!).

    Don't worry about the surgery, honestly! The thought of it is much much worse than the reality! I hate not being in control too but the staff were great and were very used to tears!!! I'm off work this week and I'm still bloated and a bit sore but am able to do things more now! Just watch for the shoulder tip pain from the gas! And me you have been through labour and have also had awful pains every month so the pain post-laparoscopy is nothing in comparison!

    Good luck! Hope it all goes well for you and try not to worry!

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