Cutting days down for elderly grandparent

[Anon290387]

My grandmother is 83yo. She has been on dialysis for around 3 years now. Throughout the 3 years she has been attending 3x a week (Tue, Thurs, Sat). She mentioned a couple of weeks ago that they where going to change it to two days a week. This came into effect last week. What I would like to know is are they doing this because they know she’s comming to the end of her life or is it because she is getting better (which unfortunately I doubt). Over the last 3 years (since starting treatment) she has lost all appetite, she’s probably weighing in at 7 stone, always tired, sick atleast once a week, passes no urine. But most noticeable is her memory is fading drastically. We believe she has dementia and we have tried to urge her to go for tests but she refuses point blank. Just the other day she referred to my father as my uncle and when I told her he was my dad she got flustered and couldn’t understand. She forgets the common stuff like names (i have a lot of female cousins and we all look similar so can be confusing), times and places we are meeting or when I am picking her up. Thankfully she hasn’t forgotten the main things like where she lives or who she is but could this be a result of dialysis or old age? Reason why I am here asking is because we are not allowed on the ward she has made it clear to doctors and nurses that she doesn’t want any of us knowing anything and when we have tried to get updates we have been told it is patient confidentiality. When dropping her off we have to leave her at the door and pick her up from the door. This has been so for the past 8 month. Myself, grandfather and aunt have all tried and she has simply put a block on it. Any help and advice would be much appreciated.

[Redoralive]

I wouldn't know to comment on whether dialysis would be stopped for end of life care (although I would think if this was the case the patient would have had to have asked for that to happen or consented), but I have another possible reason.

So haemodialysis takes off any accumulated fluid weight as well as filtering the blood. I go 3 times a week, but only for 2 hour sessions (a usual session is 4~). I only need to go this often because my inability to diet makes my potassium sky rocket but I don't drink much and my remaining kidney function is sufficient. It's possible that your nan isn't eating or drinking as much as she used to and therefore her bloodwork/weight is remaining quite consistent. Haemodialysis is harsh on the body so its likely if thats happening they would decrease the number of weekly sessions.

I have no experience of dementia but I wish you and your family the best in finding a way forward

[kayjay19]

Before you proceed any further, you will need professional advice & I would advise you to contact her GP, her local council Social services & her local Age Concern for information on becoming her carer. There seems no "official" way of registering, but this may give certain access to her medical conditions & suggest remedies for your knowledge base. Good luck.

[Kimberbaby]

I'm sorry but it sounds like dementia, not dialysis is the problem. I'm underweight too and they have me on IDPN inter-dialytic parenteral nutrition. It's 1000 calories they put through my machine. They may have reduced her days due to her size too. My mom has dementia and I'm on dialysis so I can try to help you anyway I can. Ask about the nutrition therapy at her center. The dietician can help. Maybe telling your mom that you are worried about her and really just want to make sure everything is okay. It took a lot to get my mom to the neurologist and later to a psychiatrist when she became severely depressed and stopped eating. Best of luck to you and your family, I'm praying for strength and that mom agrees to see the doctor!

[welcome]

I do not think it is a case of dementia. Other alternative would be to see the renal consultant at the dialysis unit with you present and find out more with regards to sessions being reduced. It could very well be that in a case of full 4 hour sessions, often the dialysis days are reduced to 2 sessions per week to allow body to cope with the procedure. This had happened to couple of fellow patients who are approaching 100 years being young