Hi All, I hope that we can all find the strength to overcome our individual gremlins and have a good Christmas be it with family, friends or in the peace and quiet of our own homes.
I've gone from feeling really positive a few weeks back to feeling just lame and lethargic. This week I have gone back to seeking silence and just curling up with emptiness, brain freeze and lethargy. The only things that get me going are either the dogs or if I have agreed to meet someone. I don't tend to let people down but will let myself down. I had a cholesterol test the other day which is slightly high but my B12 and folic are quite low. The doctor thinks it might be the half a bottle of red a day that I drink, but having done some googling I am thinking that it might be more than alcohol. I see the doctor on Friday so will ask more questions and let him know more about other symptoms which he does not know about as they have been put down to stress before. I now realise that stress and depression can affect my body in so many different ways but it can also POTENTIALLY be masking other problems, so I now find myself in a negative chicken and egg quandary as to what is causing what! I'm not one for over reacting but my body keeps giving strange signals that could be a whole load of different things that I am starting to become preoccupied and possibly a little paranoid about it. The web can be really useful but it can also put the fear of God into you, so I think the Doctor is going to have to do some tests to put my mind at rest.
Dropped in to see a friend and colleague today and she thinks I am sounding much better, I had to point out that she is comparing her recollection of me at work starting to crack up with the outside of work Alex that is always bubbly and friendly with people - she needs to be a fly on the wall when I am alone!
Anyway I wish you all a stress/anxiety/depression free Christmas. I'm off to try and make my fortune designing a 'kick yourself up the backside' tool now..... got some ideas! 
Alex
P.S. Johnny - please say something, you have been very quiet of late, hope all is ok?
Christmas message to all X
So tired of being strong 
Narcissistic ‘friend’
