Some days I'm not sure if it's just anxiery, just depression or if it's all an illusion.

[alexotoole]

There a days where I can really motivate myseld ro get on track; I'm pretty good at it. I'm 18 years and and in love with the gym; but I let negative experiences or negative emotions wegh on me the minute I open my eyes in the morning and sometimes takes up to 3 hours to get out. I have the occassional day where NOTHING from sugar to gym to cold showers to healthy eating works and I have to ride it out. Its not wven sonwtiems that I'm thinking negative. It doesnt connect with my emotions. As if my heart just doesnt't want to believe it could get better UNLESS there is logic behind it. General logic and common sense is the only thing that gets me up in the morning. Does anyone else work in retail or somewhere when they get so overcrowded with negative emotions and self esteem about yourself; to the point you actually get a sinus headache; then I get motivated again and (sort of) snap out and you know pump yourself up because the thought of grtting out can be a dopamine rush but then it never lasts and you fall back into the pit over and over again.. walking depression. I think I'm going to try posting on here everyday and see how much it helps; writing seems to really ease my anxiety and negatve feelings so i'm going to give it a go. I'll keep ya'll updated :)

[chloe40]

Hi alexotoole

Welcome to our Community.

It is always good therapy to write your emotions down and I suggest you keep an journal, that way you can keep a log of your moods, what time of day this happens and when you feel good and what you did to achieve this.

I Hope it helps.

Chloe

[ccg30]

I thought I'd reply to this as the title really caught my eye; that's exactly something I've been feeling as well, and reading your post I can certainly empathise with a lot of what you're feeling. I can't offer much advice, although if you say writing seems to help you maybe try a journal? (A friend who has had depression for 6 years recommended the idea and it can really help I find, especially working out what triggers certain moods etc.) But otherwise I'd just say that, although it is very easy to doubt yourself (certainly I find it is!), this isn't all in your head or just an illusion, and so perfectly reasonable to affect you.