My Life is a MESS

Hello, and thanks for reading this. I REALLY need some support - sorry to be needy :-( I had a complete nervous breakdown the middle of February, spend 20 days inpatient, and three weeks in a partial hospitalization program. I felt more positive after the treatment, but when I returned home to the 'real world' my entire life changed for the worse. I lost my son (he and his father moved out of my home) and now my finances are a MESS. My mother will not speak to me because of everything going on and I have no help. I do not know what to do and how to overcome all of this. It is pure hell. How is anyone supposed to recover under these harsh conditions? Has anyone else made it through something like this? PLEASE HELP!

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  • Hello Renee, You are not alone and you will find support and information from our members. Probably tomorrow after people have had a read and a think. I haven't experienced this personally. but I do have a few questions and ideas for you.First of all going through a nervous breakdown and being hospitalized is a very frightening experience. No one would choose to go through this, so I am wondering what your husband and Mother were thinking. Where is their support ? I am assuming they haven't treated you well in the past. I think you are going to have to take some legal steps to ensure your future and to get your son back.You need to document everything that has happened so far. Doctor visits, diagnoses, when your husband left. Ask your Doctor to write something about the lack of family support etc.You should also be following a treatment from your Dr. to the letter. Do not leave your house, I mean move or sell. You at least have a place to bring your child. I think I've written enough and others will follow. Keep us posted. Pam

  • Thank you SO MUCH for your reply. I really appreciate the support. This is BY FAR the worst thing that has ever happened to me, and I wake up every day trapped in a nightmare. I have been documenting doctor visits (thank you for that advice). We have court again on Tuesday and I am a nervous wreck. I will post the results. Thanks again.

  • Hello Reneenay, "changed for the worse" must be the understatement of the year. On the face of it the lack of support by your husband and son is pretty well unbelievable , and also by your mother.

    Your experience is so outside anything I have ever had that I can't offer much help except to ask some questions which might give some possibilities. I would say first that the fact you've written a coherent explanatory post instead of just screaming says a lot for your stability and strength.

    Firstly do you have siblings or other family members you can discuss this with ? They may not be able to help but just the opportunity to discuss it you should find helps. They may be able to offer advice or help that will help keep you grounded in all these problems. It is not the sort of burden you should be carrying alone without sharing.

    Secondly do you own your own home ? If yes, this could be a source of finance as you may be able to downsize giving eventually a source of finance while you get sorted out. Alternatively you might be able to let part of your home if your son and his father are living away although one would hope your son will return to your home.

    I would also make a visit to your GP a priority. GPs see a lot of the problems of life, not just medical ones and he may have more helpful suggestions than I have given and he should certainly be made aware as early as possible on the stressful situation you have emerged into.

    I'm I so sorry I can't write something more helpful but I do wish you the good luck you are long overdue to be getting.

    Olderal

  • Thank you SO MUCH for your reply. I really appreciate the support. This is BY FAR the worst thing that has ever happened to me, and I wake up every day trapped in a nightmare. I have been documenting doctor visits (thank you for that advice). We have court again on Tuesday and I am a nervous wreck. I will post the results. Thanks again.

  • Hello Reneenay,again. One of the problems of answering posts is that we know so little of the background to posts but reading your post again I am struck by the fact that you don't seem angry at the actions of your son's father, or your mother. Also that you are apologising for being needy. These to me are clues that you are a decent person , apparently with far from decent relatives.

    Even so it is difficult to imagine how any man could have so little imagination or be so evil as to move out just as you come out of severe medical problems, and need support. Also of course we don't know your son's age. It is of course possible your son's father could be so terrified of mental illness (some still are) he just had to move out, although its hard to imagine such cowardice at a time when you had need. Whatever the circumstances its quite possible that living with a man so apparently lacking in decent feelings and character was largely responsible for your breakdown , and that bad as the situation is , it does not necessarily mean your health will collapse again as he has now moved out.

    Even so I do think its important that you make your GP fully aware of the situation and ask him to inform the hospital team of the circumstances.

    As I said before your experiences are so far removed from anything I have experienced that I can't offer any practical advice except to say that surely in the UK there must be some facility to help in your circumstances and I would start with your GP.

    Olderal

  • Thank you SO MUCH for your kind posts. You definitely hit the nail on the head. I've thought a lot about what you have written, and I feel so much better. THANK YOU again :-) Your support means the world to me. Enjoy your day, Olderal.

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