Once again I've made another work related mistake. Thought I'd attached some receipts to an expenses balance sheet but I hadn't. Now I've got to run them up to London. I know that this absent-mindedness and lack of conscientiousness is down to depression. I swore I'd done this but lo and behold they were still in my possession. The things that depression has taken away from me over the years include self-confidence, self-esteem, my capacity for learning and worsening of pre-existing issues. I always have been a bit sieve-headed when it comes to being conscious of things, often misplacing things or forgetting keys, wallets etc but it just seems to be getting a lot worse. Also studying things I feel I'm even repelled by. I think when I had a few bad life events back in 2005 things maybe immediately were affected. I remember doing guitar lessons around that time. I had a sub teacher for one or two lessons. The usual teacher had left some handover notes. It described me as an 'adult learner, but very slow'. That really hurt me. I don't know whether it was I wasn't getting enough practice time at home, or whether I was just slow in the actual lessons. Either way it got to me.
Just really peed off how much confidence I've lost and maybe now I've got to limit my ambitions, because I've obviously got too many problems now.