All Alone Now

Well, today I met up with my wife who had left me, I thought temporarily, to let me sort my health problems out only for her to say she wasn't coming back at all. She told me that my behaviour was getting out of control and reminded her of her first husband who became physically abusive towards her. Well, I would never ever hurt her and feel I am now, very slowly, taking control of my life again..........until today that is. I really don't know where to turn as she is my life. I know she hasn't reached her decision lightly but also know she won't change her mind on this. We are BOTH hurting like hell.

6 Replies

  • So sorry to read this Barriep these things are never easy,I've no doubt that this latest upset will be hard to bear,and may further effect you're health.I wish you a full and rapid recovery and sincerely hope you're wife reconsidered her decision. as you say your both hurting that must mean she still loves you.

  • Thanks for your kind words pet-lamb. I truly hope my wife has a change of heart too.

  • I am sorry to hear this Barrie as it must be devastating for you. Unfortunately depression, especially with anger issues, can lead to marriage break down. I can understand your wife's decision as she lived with an abusive man once and obviously is terrified to going there again.

    Take your treatments and get yourself a lot better and prove to her you are still the man she married and she might decide to give it another go. It will take time though but does give you something to aim for. I really hope you can get back together in the near future. Hugs x

  • Thank you for your kind words, whether we get back together or not I need to sort myself out and am determined to do so. x

  • Hello Barrie

    Sorry to here your news, Depression hits hard especially when it comes to low mood and sometimes flustration.

    Have been away for a time, up in the Hills, have you talked to your GP as yet, there may be ways to control your anger, there is or was a course that patients with your problem can attend. (ANGER MANAGEMENT) that may help, however to control your depression is the first way to just begin your treatment if you have done so already.

    You need to understand why ?, you are the way you are so CBT could be a good starting point. There are several pathways your GP and possibly your CPN could go so you need to get something arranged as soon as you can.

    Sometimes I can get angry and in my case it is caused by feeling that people are not listening to my point of view. I overreact. This just cause an overreaction and a flight of flight reaction that needs to be controlled


  • Thanks Bob, at the moment I just feel numb with my loss and not angry really - this may be the Citalopram kicking in or my depression has worn me out so much I can't feel much emotionally. I am due to revisit my GP soon, I do not have a CPN but am seeing a new, more experienced, counsellor next week who does practice CBT. Will let you know what happens.

    Best regards. B.

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