So I went to the doctors they said I could possibly have bipolar I'm supposed to be taking citalopram 10mg for a month to see if it helps, all it has done so far is make me feel like I'm on drugs, hallucinating, can't eat, can hardly sleep, one minute I feel as happy as anything like nothing can touch me and I can do anything I want, and then I 'crash' and get the urge to take more to feel that high again, luckily I haven't, one morning I ended up chucking the tablets down the sink because I ended up thinking why the hell not, just out of interest did anyone else feel like this when taking them?
Anyway I finally spoke to my employer about what is happening and what has happened, now I no longer have to go into work until the 18th as they have to think about the residents as I'm a carer and work nights so they have to put the safety of them and me first, I do understand this i really do, but it's just made me feel so shit like I'm incapable of doing anything as people are always going to look at me also some crazy person. I know this isn't the case and I completely understand but something in my head is telling me otherwise.
I have another appointment with the doctor next Thursday about what the medication was doing to me, I literally feel like my head is going to explode at the minute.
Just needed to vent this out