Hello everyone, I'm new to this site - in fact I'm new to this completely! I'm just looking for people who are experiencing the same things as me. I feel that I'm in a bit of a rut and am not sure how to get out of it.

I've seen my GP and been off work for nearly 3 weeks now with depression. I've been prescribed an anti-depressant but do not really want to take it as I am on medication for migraines and it makes me so tired and lethargic. I thought that with a bit of time away from work that I would be able to fight it off, but I'm not sure that I am. I am due to go back to work at the end of next week but still do not feel ready, however I am feeling the pressure because I can't afford to take a cut in money due to me being off sick.

I have counselling arranged at my GP practice, but this is not until the middle of August.

Worrying about work and the need to go back to work due to money is not helping my situation. Some days I feel better than others but some days, like today, I just feel so tired and low. I want to get back to my normal self. I am a busy Mum of 4 (however only got 2 kids at home now and the youngest is 18) and I work full time and have to drive 40 miles a day to my job - which is not ideal. I'm trying to find a job nearer to home but that is easier said than done.

I'm not sure when I started feeling the way I do, but I think that it has been coming on gradually over the last few months. I used to love my job and I am a very conscientious worker and take pride in my work, but I seem to have lost interest in it and have no real desire to go back. I lost a work colleague in a road traffic accident a few months ago and I think that things started to go awry then. I also had a small bump in my car a few weeks ago and that was the last straw. I have been off sick since then.

I just feel lost at the moment and am not sure which direction to go in. I feel that I am going through the motions of every day life, but can't seem to engage in anything. Does any of this make sense to anybody?

Thank you for reading.



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3 Replies

  • Hello,

    I am sorry that you have hit a rough patch. Depression can be a horrific thing which both dominate and take over out lives.

    When I lost my dear wife Lorna in January last year that I really sank to the very bottom in depression. Lornas family were all there for me.

    But they told me that I really needed counselling because it I had sunk so low.

    I took their counsel and saw a excellent counsellor who over a period of time slowly but surely got me back up to the top again. My counsellor told me that she would help me but I would have to help myself to get up to the top again.

    I still feel extremely lonely, but I fully realise that life doesn't stop for any of us.

    Sometimes one tries to get by on ones own, but there are times in life when we all need help. I leave you decide whether counselling is for you.

    I also suffer from temporal lobe epilepsy (which I personally believe can, in my case case be pre-empted by anxiety and depression alike.

    My epilepsy can put the fear of God into me, causing me to shut down my television and radio, and sit here waiting for the next clap of thunder and lightning to strike. Horrific!

    However I know that I have to beat this or this will beat me and simply take over my life. This is a no go, I simply have to think positively and start to lead a normal life again. Extremely difficult but it can be done.

    Remember on ITunes you can download some very good Relaxation CDs which can also help you.

    Whatever decision you make I wish you all the very best.

    Take care


    Author of epilepsy-theunwelcomevisito...

  • If your youngest child is eighteen I wonder if you are in your mid forties and if this is the case I can understand the situation you may find yourself in. Although only you and your GP will be able to say the problem is hormonal.

    Middle age is a time where we all can start to ask ourselves various life questions and that can make us feel very depressed as we ask ourselves if all that we have done has been worthwhile as we seem to loose the pathway that we chose those thirty years ago.

    We begin to possibly see oldest family members failing and children growing up and leaving home. Many at this time can feel lost as life begins to move on and we start and balk at our proposed future.

    As well as this, if we loose a friend of our same time period that can also force you to apply the brakes and again you wonder what life holds for you.

    Our lives will go through set periods that many will relate to. You seem now to question a job you loved for a one that is that much nearer than now, so I suppose if you are feeling unsettled it can take just several questions or thoughts out of context and that makes us think what is it all about..

    The secret now is consider what you and partner would like to do when you gain all this time when family members begin to move on and this could cause you to consider the life you have had and what you are able to do now

    This period and change does not need to be massive, you may be just happy the way you are.

    You say you will be starting talking therapy in August, you may find that could be useful. What does your husband/partner think about your feelings ?


    Ps Give time for your medications to work A further two to three weeks

  • Hi there. Don't worry, your not going mad!! It all makes sense. Your a busy mum with responsibilities. We live in a world where you have to be everything to everyone wether it's work or home life! Life is crazy and fast paced and sometimes your going in all directions without time for a breather away from the rut. Also losing people and the accident didn't help!! We all need to nurture our inner self and be around people who understand. Even people who look like there on top of everything have crisis in there life. Your human not a robot. Although in this world I feel like a robot at times. I hope ive helped you a bit? I'm just going to work, so will msg you later if you want. I'm sorry you feel so down. It's a horrid feeling isn't it. I feel so alone when I feel this way. Remember your not alone, people on this site do care. Love and hugs elaine.

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