I've been laying here for ages, trying to get to sleep, but I can't, no matter what I do. I don't know what to do with myself. The longer I lie here, the more I think about how bad everything is going, and everything gets very dark. I can't bring myself to feel anything, I'm just here, laying. I've been thinking about self harming again, I'm just empty, and the only way I can feel anything is through pain; I can't even cry anymore. I need to feel something, and I'm usually such a sensitive person, but I feel nothing now, and I hate it. I'm beginning to hate myself now, and if I hate myself, how can I expect other people not to.