Sorry if it seems I am on here just to ask and not give advice, but I was just wondering what to do on a day like this?
My partner is at work, my daughter is at school and I am alone in the house and bored to death. I cannot sit in the garden as neighbours are out and I have social anxiety. I feel horrible that my life has come to this, sat about with literally nothing to do. I am currently listening to music on YouTube whilst my dinner is cooking but I cannot get this horrible feeling of my life being a complete waste out of my head. I feel horrendous.
I am so self conscious so even when I do leave the house I hate walking past people and if they look at me I feel like they are disgusted by how I look.
Also I have health anxiety too and am convinced I have some terrible illness. My mind is all over the place, I haven't laughed for ages. I hate my life at the moment.
Don't get me wrong I love my family etc, I enjoy nature, I think the world (in general) is a beautiful place, but at the moment I genuinely cannot stand my life. I don't feel able to work or anything.
I have tried CBT last year and it was lovely speaking to somebody about myself and the way I am but it just didn't work overall. I am considering doing it again just to give me a bit routine (I had in once a week last time for 16 weeks).
This weather is horrible though, I havent tied my hair up in 10 years and I do not like having short trousers/sleeves so I sweat all the time.
Sorry for being so negative I am just sick of this.