Thinking about giving up.Mental challenges/dou... - Couch to 5K

Couch to 5K

132,409 members158,562 posts

Thinking about giving up.Mental challenges/doubt :-( xxx

seets profile image
55 Replies

Hello xx

Completed the couch to 5K course. Running three nights a week (30-40 minutes) without stopping which is great but....I am really, really struggling with mental challenges. I read tonight that 90% of running is mental and I honestly do believe that. I am feeling a bit fed up and like I need to give up.

I am physically fit enough to run a 5K....mentally I am miles behind. It starts before I go for a run...I absolutely dread it...I put it off....I make any excuse not to go.

I do go...I always manage to drag myself out but...getting to that point takes some time. I can't seem to just get up and go. I mope around for ages.

At the start of the run, my thoughts are usually:

This doesn't feel pleasant.

I cant believe I've got to run miles and I'm already not enjoying it

I don't think I can do this.

(This is on a constant loop).

Half way through the run I am like:

This feels rubbish.

I can't believe I am only half way round.

Maybe I can stop sooner tonight.

Maybe I will *have* to stop sooner tonight.

Why don't I just run 20 minute runs from now on? (Trying to make an excuse to just stop there and then).

I always push through...but I am sick of the constant mental battle with myself on my way around :-(

Seriously thinking about just giving up. I actually hate running but...I do it because nothing compares to it (in terms of what it does for my fitness levels, body shape, weight control etc).

In a bad running place. Does anyone have any words of encouragement they'd be kind enough to share?

I could honestly cry. As soon as I take the first running step....the fight with my brain begins and doesn't stop until I've completed the full run (if it's a 40 minute one...that's a long time!)

It is constant doubt.

Running would be so so much easier without this :-( xx

Written by
seets profile image
seets
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
55 Replies

Have you looked for a podcast to listen to? There are many and I’m sure you’ll find one that interests you 👌🏻 I’ve tried music and that hasn’t helped much so I’m researching podcasts.

seets profile image
seets in reply to

Thank you so much xx i always have music.....never considered listening to anything else! I am going to give that a go xx thank you xx

in reply to seets

You’re welcome 😆 Xx

SquishyBean profile image
SquishyBeanGraduate in reply to

I second this. Or an audiobook works great too.

in reply to

I was wondering about that myself. I found a ton of audiobooks on Spotify which I wasn't expecting (I thought audiobooks could only be found on Audible) so I might try those if the music doesn't work out for me.

cornishgirl29 profile image
cornishgirl29Graduate in reply to

That is a brilliant idea. I listen to audio books and it kinda distracts you from your thoughts of why am I doing this,this is uncomfortable /painful/boring...and just makes you want to hear the next bit of the story or indeed podcast.

I

What other exercises have you tried, you say nothing compares to running, why do you say that?

seets profile image
seets in reply to

For me personally, nothing compares to running xx it changes my whole body shape...and my fitness levels are the best they can be when im running regularly.

I have been quite sporty over the years. I have been a gym/weights girl, not anymore. I have played rugby and tag. Hiking, climbing. Squash and tennis. Been to lots of classes (hi intensity, spinning etc). Running is the only thing that keeps me at this level if fitness.

in reply to seets

Yes i have done most of those things too..body building was a big thing for me but i got like you were mentally i didnt want to do it anymore. (i had a few health issues too)

Maybe you need to do something else for a while then get back to the running.

GoGo_JoJo profile image
GoGo_JoJoGraduate

I would be drowning those gremlins with loud music, singing along to keep myself focused.

Is there a running group near you you could join? Perhaps a social element would help?

Jay2019 profile image
Jay2019 in reply to GoGo_JoJo

That first sentence - YES!! x

Irish-John profile image
Irish-JohnGraduate

I record music, and also BBC radio dramas and comedy - that keeps my attention :)

I also enter for events a few months or more in the future - that keeps me focused on a tangible goal :)

I also mapped out three "regular routes".

One is almost dead flat, one is fairly brutal hills and the third is a nice mixture of hills and flats. Depending on my mood/needs I can chose which is "best" so the run doesn't feel "pointless" :)

Most of all though - I never want to be the depressed fat b*$ta?d I was before. I sometimes really DON'T WANNA GO out the door, but a) I've gone out enough times to know I'll be happier than if I stay in, b) I am staving off heart attack, muscular degeneration, obesity, fragile bones etc etc 'cos while I'm relatively fine now, age is a relentless progression, and c)... When I am running in an event, with the exception of one that the organisers cocked up beyond all belief, I have an absolutely fantastic time. The kind of enjoyment I haven't had since I was a clueless wee kiddie unbroken and unscarred by life and adversaries :)

So, advice?

Vary your route

Listen to something that engages your interest without frustrating your attention - I love mysteries but can never keep the names, clues, chain of evidence etc straight when I'm running lol.

Register and pay for a race a month or so away, study the course map, plan your run -pace, where you want to be each mile, how you want to space water stops etc. It's a lot of interesting fun, and a lot of fun seeing how it actually goes :)

I haven't run since doing a HM last Saturday. Tomorrow I will go for a trot on the level route. And as always, just going out the door will have the Lizard part of my brain doing it's best to stop me. That's the only part of running I hate - even after three years and umpteen miles, the distance from bedroom to front door can suck :/

But - remember then what is waiting :)

Wishing you many happy miles in your future :)

Inforthelongru profile image
InforthelongruGraduate in reply to Irish-John

Fantastic advice!

Irish-John profile image
Irish-JohnGraduate in reply to Inforthelongru

Thank you :)

2Tired2Run profile image
2Tired2RunGraduate in reply to Irish-John

THE most inspirational read, thank you.

Irish-John profile image
Irish-JohnGraduate in reply to 2Tired2Run

Thank you:)

cornishgirl29 profile image
cornishgirl29Graduate in reply to Irish-John

I am so impressed by that advice. And yes our Lizard brain. Fab.

Irish-John profile image
Irish-JohnGraduate in reply to cornishgirl29

Thank you :)

Pippa10 profile image
Pippa10Graduate

When I read your post it’s almost like running is a punishment. Any exercise should be a positive in your life and definitely you need it to be fun. If you only enjoy 20 mins then just run 20 mins, if you just do the bits you enjoy you can build on that. You’ve done so well and given yourself this amazing life skill. I don’t find running easy and this morning was my worst one yet. Don’t look at times or distance just enjoy the running your surroundings, who cares if it’s a slow jog....just so long as you’re enjoying it that’s all that matters....oh and good positive songs, I’m a girl of the 80’s so I’m sorted. 😜😁. Good luck.

You so right about the mental challenge of running ~ I change my music downloads almost weekly to keep it 'fresh' ~ possibly vary the timings you run shorter ones then a longer one, change the route or even the time of day you run ~ I wish you every success for the future x

UnfitNoMore profile image
UnfitNoMoreGraduate

Ok... you’ve done great.

So... you wanna quit the run half way sometimes? Do it... go run 15-20 sometimes, it’s such a comfortable run when you can run double. I think it’s time to vary the runs up and have some fun. I do one long run a week, right now it’s 8.25 miles, and despite all I can do, and the fact I ran just 0.5 miles less last week, those gremlins don’t wait for me to be in the new territory before they start telling me that I can’t do it... they get in early and keep shouting at me. I can beat that once a week, but I think I’d struggle to do so every run.

Have some fun with your running.

IannodaTruffe profile image
IannodaTruffeMentor

Are you running at an easy conversational pace, as described in the guide to the plan healthunlocked.com/couchto5...

It makes running much more enjoyable and is the pace that builds stamina.

Try slowing down.

Buddy34 profile image
Buddy34Graduate

Maybe sit and think of all the music you loved years ago and download it, music that reminds you of when you where younger etc. What about planning some new routes these can all help. Good luck 😊😊

Zaq12wsx profile image
Zaq12wsx

Really useful tips here, thank you (even though it’s not my post). Off to plan a new route and some different music I think 🤔

in reply to Zaq12wsx

What music will you listen to?

Zaq12wsx profile image
Zaq12wsx

I like Hed Kandi and Ministry of Sound compilations. Good beats to run to

TuxCatLady profile image
TuxCatLadyGraduate

Try podcasts or audiobooks - find something that really interests you so that you're listening to that rather then your gremlins (I have them too - you're not alone!). Maybe try another route? I think when a route gets too familiar all the landmarks you pass can just remind you how far you have to go still. Maybe a new route would shake things up a bit. Good luck!

Rogie55 profile image
Rogie55Graduate

Hi, poor you. I agree with what’s written here. I am a therapist and I would recommend going to see a masseur, shiatsu therapist or someone to speak too. It can help to get to the root of your gremlin. Extract that worm of negativity that is pulling you down. I watched Mo Farrow and he on the great north run hit a wall at 8 miles. Said he had to push through. It happens to us all. But not every run. I hope you get your mojo back. Perhaps you need a holiday! However now your’ve written on here, you’ll feel better.

This forum is very cathartic.

Jell6 profile image
Jell6Graduate

What made a big difference to me was running " no target run".

I was involved in a road traffic accident, and whilst I was unable to run for a while after it I really missed it, the first few runs after that were, "you need to take this slowly, and be kind to yourself runs "

Almost an epiphany! Since then I set a minimum timer on my phone (usually 25 minutes) and that's it, I don't focus on pace or distance, if I need to slow down, so what, this isn't how I earn my living, this is meant to be my leisure time.

Oddly enough, this new attitude hasn't really altered my times, and generally I run for longer than planned.

In your situation it's worth trying as although you say you hate running, you still see very positive effects on your body.

Plug in some good music or podcasts, take the first 10 of 15 minutes very slowly ( I generally don't notice the toxic 10 now), by then you will be almost on your home straight, you won't lose any fitness, and your stamina will improve.

I hope this will help you 🤗

PolkaDot88 profile image
PolkaDot88

Hi!

If your head is saying stop running then stop running!! but while your out there turn what was your run into a fast walk, then part way through pick up the pace again, this will confuse the hell out of the ‘I don’t like running gremlins’

They will be like hey ‘we told this one to stop running’ 😠 = 😂 but you will be fighting back each time you pick up the pace. Make a joke in your head out of tricking them into thinking they have won! ‘I know now I sound nuts’ 😂😂😂

Whilst running/walking think of the all the things that running has help you achieve - ie:- that item of clothing you thought you’d never fit into - the ‘You look amazing’ complements you never thought you’d get - Also what about the feeling you have when you look in the mirror & see that your running has paid off, just look at your figure 👀wow!

All those things should tell you that you have already beaten the running gremlins... and you can continue to do so, but only you can do this. 🙂

Now get out there & fight back don’t let them take your prize away, you have worked too long & too Dam hard to get to where you are. 😁

Oldfloss profile image
OldflossAdministratorGraduate

Just stop... chill and think about how to improve this:)

Firstly... shake it up...C25K was just the beginning... so...now, short runs..., 30 minute runs.... and the lovely long slow relaxed runs which build every single aspect of our running up... :)

New routes and old routes, different types of routes, a few hills, off road and on road...

When I graduated, and still, ( when I am not doing specific training for a race or anything) I run three times a week.. and there is always a short, maybe speedy run...no more than 3K or so... always a run that is around 30 to 40 minutes and a slow Sunday run day where I head out and run for anything up to 2 hours:)

But, if plans go awry, like this morning, where I have woken to a thunder and lightning storm with torrential rain, sometimes things need to be adjusted,, so now the clouds have cleared and the storm has passed..it will be a 30 minute fun run:) We just do not worry about things like that :)

I am still finding new routes in my local area.. I run when I head to the coast every other week.. I have run wherever I have holidayed...never boring, never an effort and never in doubt.

I set my gear out the night before and I still get that butterfly feeling...

Now, I can hear you saying.. that is okay for you... but I don;t feel like that.. well, I feel the difference might be... that I take it slow and steady.. ( my slow now, is not the slow it was in 2015) but I relax, I take it all in... I only push if I wish too...then when I get in, I write about it:)

My rambles on here are infamous!

So, be kind to yourself... relax, mix things up and see how you go :)

Emsworth19 profile image
Emsworth19Graduate

I felt sad reading your post, running shouldn’t be a chore, sometimes getting out is hard but when it’s done you should hopefully feel better for it. I graduated back in June and have been running 3 times a week, I lost my mojo a few weeks ago, really couldn’t be arsed but with some advice from here, I’ve got back into it and loving it. Watch Japanese slow jogging video on YouTube, try it, I did and it helped me as I think I was running too fast and not enjoying it. Also, listen to podcasts, I’ve given up music and always listen to podcasts now, really takes your mind off running, especially if it’s a funny one, I sometimes have to stop myself laughing out loud! I recommend sh**ged, married and annoyed by Chris and Rosie Ramsey, so funny! I listened to Fred and Rose West’s tapes too, intriguing, before I knew it I’d done 5k! Can you run in the morning? Then you won’t have to dread it all day. And only run for 10, 15, 20 mins if you want some days, then walk, it doesn’t matter. I really hope you get back into it, good luck and let us know how you go. (Soz for long post 😆)

RunningChocoholic profile image
RunningChocoholicGraduate

Hi, I can’t add much more to all the brilliant advice above but I recently read on here doing simple maths sums is a way to distract the gremlins. I thought 🤔 really?? But I gave it a go. I still have my music going but just by doing my times tables or counting back from 100 in 2s or 3s has been effective. Clearly you can see I’m no Einstein but I start them when I feel the toxic 10 looming and they have been a really good way of distracting me. I hope you find a way through this x

Swimmer50 profile image
Swimmer50Graduate

Hi, I'm a cognitive behavioural therapist and you're right, the battle is psychological. You know you can do it physically because the evidence is there, you always push through and you finish. The problem is that you start to convince yourself you can't from the start of the run (if not before). If you want to keep running, and it sounds as though you do because you've listed all the reasons why it's good for you, you need to change your mindset. Instead of talking yourself out of it before you set off, you need to use some positive self talk. Tell yourself you CAN do it, because you've done it many times before. Instead of talking yourself into 'just 20 minutes' don't focus on the time, just identify your route and keep running. The reason you're not enjoying it is because you're telling yourself you don't. If you stop when your head tells you to, you'll feel bad and reinforce that you can't do it. Allow yourself to feel the achievement when you've finished and start to think of yourself as a runner, rather than someone who is doing it because they have to.

GoGo_JoJo profile image
GoGo_JoJoGraduate in reply to Swimmer50

👍🏻😁

Yup! And.... smile! Everything feels better when we smile. Having a stupid grin plastered on my face often makes me laugh too, which helps even more!

PolkaDot88 profile image
PolkaDot88 in reply to GoGo_JoJo

Me too 😂😂

Mimirossi profile image
MimirossiGraduate in reply to GoGo_JoJo

I find that smiling works too!

GoGo_JoJo profile image
GoGo_JoJoGraduate in reply to Mimirossi

It really, really does! Plus it starts a chain, you smile, someone smiles back which in turn makes you smile more, they smile at someone else and so on and so on! Let's all make the world a more smiley place! 👍🏻😁

caroldavies071969 profile image
caroldavies071969Graduate

Do you use a running app? I use Strava, and it really helps to motivate me. I love seeing what distance I've done, calories I've burnt, what my pace was like etc etc. I also love that my Strava friends see my run on their newsfeed and can give kudos and comment on it and likewise I do the same to them. Good luck with trying out some of the suggestions given, hopefully you'll find a way to keep running.

Dalmorangie profile image
DalmorangieGraduate

Seets, you, me and everyone else on this planets have two “brains” and one is instinctive/reactive and the other is thoughtful/rational. Unfortunately for us they both work simultaneously and the former tends to shout loudest as it were! This isn’t me being all new age, hippy dippy, etc but it’s pyschological fact.

I’m no expert but coming across this sort of stuff as I’m doing a business degree at the minute and reading a lot about cognitive capability and emotional intelligence.

Reading your posts, you’ve got two massive advantages over me and I’d suspect many other C25K graduates - (1) you’re physically fit enough to do this without issues (that must be an amazing place to be!) and (2) you’ve also got a strong sporty/fitness pedigree (so you’re not starting from a zero base and have a reservoir of proven capability to draw from). I’d also add that you can clearly see the benefits of running. You’re actually in a fantastic place!

Minds work through electrical charges (thoughts) sparking with others to create synapses (sort of mind muscles) and there’s a psychological phrase that what fires together, wires together.....basically how you are thinking determines how you see things. The good news is there’s an effect called nueroplasticity (get me!) which basically means you can as such rewire your mind by positive thinking and using your second “brain” (System 2 as it’s known) to either quieten down or take over from the jittery and noisy System 1 “brain”.

All the advice here is sound re using other stimuli (music, podcasts, new routes, etc) to shut S1 off and I’d say have a real think about the positives of your 🏃‍♂️ (you’ve listed them here) and how you can build on those.

I’d also say google, go on YouTube, buy books or whatever on sports psychology as this sort of experience is common throughout and impacts on top sports people.... if you’re watching the 🏉 World Cup, note the rituals all the kickers go through before putting boot to ball....that’s all psychological and not for show - look up Jonny Wilkinson and Dave Alred.

Sorry I’ve gone on here a bit but learning about all this stuff recently and over the last few years since a change in job has helped me tremendously - minds are like muscles and do ache but can be trained and retrained....plus without mixing too many metaphors, remember the fire together, wire together line and that old song about accentuate the positive.

Hope that helps and feel free to come back on the forum or contact any of us here 👍

MuddledGardener profile image
MuddledGardenerGraduate in reply to Dalmorangie

Great post, thanks Dalmorangie! That is useful for all of us! 😊

Kat332zz profile image
Kat332zzGraduate

I’m a goal oriented girl. I am also not so keen on running but understand it’s benefits. So I go to parkrun each Saturday, I’ve now attended 9 times, some running some volunteering, and people are starting to come and talk to me now, just general chit chat, but it makes me want to turn up and join in the fun. I agree with lots of the comments above re varying the types of run too. I had to build up my running again after injury and those shorter, slower runs were almost fun! Have a week or two off to recharge and start back easily, we all know you can do it.

GreenLizard profile image
GreenLizardGraduate

Sending you big warm cyber teddy bear hugs 🐻

Like you I sometimes have a really negative conversation with myself, not just when I am running. But I find music really helps. It can help lift my mood, help me have a little cry, help to carry my legs along.

There is data now that lots of people are able to manage their mental health with running - the release of endorphins during/after running can be as helpful as antidepressants to some people.

Hope you manage to keep going 😁🌞🤪

GreenLizard profile image
GreenLizardGraduate

Oh the other things are stories or Zombie run! I know of people enjoy that game. Zombies give me nightmares so defo my for me. 😀

MuddledGardener profile image
MuddledGardenerGraduate

I had a similar experience a couple of months ago. You sound a bit burned out, like I was. My pace was becoming slower each time, I was exhausted and definitely not enjoying it. I followed advice on here, to have a rest (which in my case was about a week and a half), then start slowly, mixing up my runs, so I did a 2k run, a 3k run, and then Parkrun on the Saturday. I also walked whenever I felt I needed to, but at a brisk pace. It worked a treat, and I am now using the C25k+ podcasts, to develop my stamina and speed. I do Parkrun every Saturday, which is a real social event, and although I run with my running club, I do my own thing.

You will get through this, after all, you got through C25k, didn’t you? Keep coming back here and checking in, telling us how it’s going, so we can cheer you on. It’s what this forum is so good at. 😊

Mellybird profile image
MellybirdGraduate

I had exactly the same thoughts. Why am I doing this if I’m not enjoying it - but I found when I stopped for a while I really missed it and wanted to go out in the fresh air ( and run ! ) in the morning as it really did make me feel better for the rest of the day.

I have now found the Desert Island Discs podcasts .These are great for me as they are half an hour long ( which is my usual run time ) so I can listen to a complete program each time and I tend to get lost in listening about people’s lives and where they have come from to get where they are today. I pick only the ones that I think I’ll be interested in but there are hundreds to choose from.

I’ve been doing this for some time now but have found that I am now able to also run without music/ podcast/ any distraction on the occasions that I forget my earphones.

Keep going .

Dalmorangie profile image
DalmorangieGraduate in reply to Mellybird

Desert Island Discs is superb

KayBee1000 profile image
KayBee1000Graduate

Have you thought about joining a running club? It sounds like some of your earlier sports were more social, done with other people. Maybe you need to chat with other people whilst running to drown out the gremlins?

Tasha99 profile image
Tasha99Graduate

But after what do you feel? I think similarly. I think lots of people do. But that post run feeling is what keeps me going. Join parkrun. Join a club.

FatterPenguin profile image
FatterPenguinGraduate

Lots and lots of good points made on this thread. All I can add is think about your reasons for starting C25K and how you would feel in six months if you gave up now. I found the simple smiley/frowny face at the start and end of the C25K app runs really helped me. I was practically always was a ☹ before I ran but often was a 😃 at the end. Slowly my brain began to realise that running made me feel happier! But that may well not be the case for you; it's a decision only you can make. Wishing you well 😊

sofaspud profile image
sofaspud

I was in a rut a while back and someone on this forum suggested Nike Run Club. There are different length runs on there (I started with the “don’t wanna run” run) which keep me going. I prefer these to podcasts but I’ve also tried podcasts.

Try shorter runs - if you can do a good 20 minute run, it’s better than a bad 40 minute run. Good luck!!

Redcello41 profile image
Redcello41Graduate

Podcasts help! I used to listen to music to energise myself while on my runs but now I listen to podcasts! Podcasts do a great job of distracting you from those sorts of negative thoughts as it gives you something else to focus your mind on!

Jandys profile image
JandysGraduate

I can totally identify with you! I ran my 24 park run on Saturday and every time I line up at the start I convince myself I won't be able to do it, I’m not a real runner, I’m too slow etc etc. Recently someone told me about the mindfulness podcasts on the Nike Running Club App. (It’s free!) There are about 10 different podcasts of varying lengths and they’ve really helped me to chase the gremlins away. Give it a try maybe? Good luck 😊

Smelliepoo profile image
SmelliepooGraduate

Just an idea, if you feel there is no point then give yourself one.

I am only on my second week of the c25k, so not got that much experience and am a bit scared that I won't achieve it, but one of the things that is currently keeping me going is the idea that at the end of this I want to do as many sponsored runs as I can for parkinsons research (but I have to get to the point where I can actually run first!) Maybe if you shift your focus to helping others then you might feel that there is a point to this, alongside all the personal benefits you get, and you might find that there is also a bit more feeling of wellbeing with it. You wouldn't just be running for yourself, you would be running because of something that you want to help make better.

I really hope you find your motivation in some way, you obviously know how much you benefit from this, so keep on. 😁X x

CrazyDogLady19 profile image
CrazyDogLady19Graduate

I used to get these thoughts to, it was like a tiny panic attack for the first 10 mins especially I’d start to think the distance was Unachievable, my legs ached , today was probably the day I’d let myself down but I didn’t and you obviously don’t want to either. Running is hard but worth it. I found listening to Not Your Average Runner a podcast helped. I’d put it on in the background at home whilst I got on with other things and just picked up on certain positive things I also find listening whilst running helps whilst you’re listening to the positive and funny things you can’t listen to your own voice sowing those seeds of doubt. Don’t be so hard on yourself your doing great, keep it up ☺️Xx

You may also like...

Thinking about giving up?

at running 5k (!) and then decrease down to just the park runs on a Saturday. Should I a) just...

About to give up, help!

the 20 minute run almost killed me but I felt incredible. On W6R3 I struggled, stopped during a run...

About to give it another go!

to run 50 minutes I’ll never know! I’m a very slow runner. I only managed to do 5k in 50 minutes so

Think I’m going to give up

sort of conversation whilst running. I was about to attempt the 20 minute run this week but clearly...

I think it's just about a year

last year I could only run for minutes at a time and now I can cover 10 miles of hilly footpaths...