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Changing Faces
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Facial disfigurement only noticeable in photos...

Hi guys, I have an asymmetrical face which is not initially noticeable to anybody unless they knew I had it and were really looking. But it seems to show up terrible in photos, the right side of my face is significantly lower (maybe smaller) and more distorted than the left side, my nose looks angled too. Sometimes when I'm tired my right eye is noticeably drooped. Does anybody else have this problem? I believe it must have been due to the traumatic birth my mother experienced (she was mentally and physically disabled) they were unable to get me out and had to use forceps. In photos of me as a child it's not hugely noticeable but still there. Am I able to have this fixed at all? It's really affecting my life I have panic attacks when people take a picture of me from the wrong side or when I'm not looking, I'm even avoiding getting married because I'll have to have photos done. Any help and advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks.

P.s I understand that there are people who are much worse off than me with a noticeable facial disfigurement and I sincerely apologise if I sound more vain than anything else.

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Hi

Faces are asymmetric, some more so than others. Me, I had an accident (dog bite) as a toddler that left my face considerably more asymmetric than it had been, and the nerves damaged on the right hand side. I grew up with issues around photography, I was the only person in my class at school to have my school photo taken in profile, rather than face forward. I got married at 27, and my fiancé and the church agreed to have the pictures taken on location and in a studio the day before the wedding, so I had my practice hair and make up done, put on my dress, and away we went. There are those of you who would say it was unlucky that he saw the dress before the wedding, but - he chose and paid for the dress, so it was more lucky than unlucky all in all. Not having to deal with a photographer on the day made it perfect - only my grandmother (whose dog it was that bit me) objected to the pre taken photos, so we didn't get her one.

Even some of the most traditionally beautiful and symmetrical people have issues with photography; famously Princess Margaret hated her picture being taken because it just didn't look like she saw in the mirror, and it was only when her (then) husband, Lord Snowdon took and developed a photograph of her accidentally from the wrong side of the film, that she saw a picture of her as she thought she looked. Everyone else thought the picture was very strange, and not like Margaret at all, but it was her favourite photo of herself, and it became common practice for her to have photos developed from the back rather than the front of film. Try holding a photo of yourself up to the mirror, and see if it looks more like you think you look. Other people often say to me "that's a lovely photo of you" and I think they're just being polite, but they're not, that's how you look to them, the only person who sees you in mirror image as you do is you. I realise that this isn't much practical help, but it is part of the reason that you dislike photos of yourself.

Good luck, get married if you're ready to, and do it how you want to -- it's your day after all.

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What you did with regards to photos of your wedding is a great idea! I will definitely suggest that to my partner although I know he won't agree with it. I am so self conscious about how I look in photos and I can't go through an actual wedding stopping the service every time the photographer takes a photo to see what I look like. Also I hate attention and I will definitely have a panic attack walking down the aisle with family taking photos from the wrong side! (Personally I would rather just me and him get married with no family there but he wants his there)

It's so frustrating because I am quite pretty! It's just in photos I look awful. My partner can't see it he says there's nothing wrong with my face but it's blatantly obvious! I think he's trying to make me feel better but it's actually making me more angry. I've ruined half of his sisters wedding photos because every time the photographer aimed the camera at me I looked away and all they have is pics of me to the side looking moody. Also on two occasions where there were photographers they could see I was avoiding having my photo done so they thought it would be hilarious to chase me around trying to get a picture as if it was one big joke :( I will make a point of telling any photographer not to photograph me from now on.

Thank you very much for your reply and advice, it's lovely to share my worries with somebody who understands!

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I'm sorry that this is so traumatic for you, it should be the most amazing experience of your life! I put on the invitations that we didn't want photographs taken and that we didn't want people to bring cameras and why. We also offered to give (as in no money changing hands) copies of the official photo - clearly of my choosing - to anyone who wanted them. We did have a photographer, but he was briefed to take shots of everyone at the wedding in couples or family groups, which he did, and I have a lovely album of photos of everyone who was there. I guess I was very lucky that my partner was so accepting of the way I wanted it, although he forgets sometimes, and now, so do I. I have some lovely pictures of me with our children, I still don't look how I think I look, I've even done professional makeovers and magazine shoots for changing faces, and they seem happy with the pictures, just not me... I understand your pain, I hope that you can make your partner see that the photograph issue, rather than actually how you really look is such a difficult thing for you

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Actually, in Japan, it is their tradition to take wedding photos before the actual event. However, most Japanese do NOT buy wedding garments. Because they usually have several changes of formal wear, wedding garb is rented and part of the rental package includes pre day wedding pics.

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Hi, firstly don't beat yourself up. Nothing wrong with caring about your appearance. My suggestion would be go and see your GP. I know that some are less helpful and open minded than others but I would recommend changing your GP if necessary so that they can assess and then, if necessary refer you to a specialist. I would also recommend that you contact a UK based charity called Changing Faces as they can provide support/workshops to help live with facial disfigurement. All the best, Alex

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Thank you for your reply and advice. I want to ask my GP but I'm afraid he won't take it seriously and think I'm just being silly. Like I said in a previous post, even I will admit I am quite pretty and I'm worried that in making my face more symmetrical to look good on camera it will drastically change how I look in person or the surgery could go wrong and I'll regret it.

I was just on the Changing Faces Facebook page looking through some pictures and it made me think there are people out there who have genuine serious facial disfigurements and here's me worrying about how I look on camera, I was quite upset with myself and started to think I shouldn't care how I look on camera anymore and just accept who I am - but that may take a while!!

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Changing Faces is there for anyone, I repeat anyone, who has an issue with how they look different, what ever the reason, and however severe/mild it may be, they are great, they will not judge you, they will not think you are wasting their time. People say very different things and are affected in very different ways by disfigurements that are large and small. I once spoke with a young woman who was bitten on the face by a dog as a young adult - something I find amazing that she copes with so well as I think that the trauma and change to having a disfigurement at that time would severely dent ones confidence, and She was sure that my experience of it happening before I can even remember, and growing up with it, going to school with it would be worse. Everyone's different! If you can accept it over time, that's great, but you shouldn't have to. Please don't be upset about worrying about the way you look!

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There are facial excersices that can help with asymmetric features. Also, there is a treatment called microcurrent (please make sure it's the old fashioned plain electric current, not the new microwave garbage) which is available at specialty facialists.

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I think we just naturally focus on very different parts of our own face than when looking at others. That’s why it only becomes apparent after pointed out, we don’t spend a lot of time examining eachother. I think we just kind of see what we want to see, whether it’s pleasing or not. Until maybe we’re forced to stare at them each morning in bed. And at that point, you in love and imperfections are endearing.

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Hi there. If you do want to contact Changing Faces, you can do so on 0207 391 9282 or by email on matthewa@changingfaces.org.uk.

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I have the same thing as you do but I don't see you as less attractive you just have a memorable face

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Nobody has answered this question yet, I'll take a shot at it. You see, the reason why you're flaws are really appealing to you is because the camera shows you, your face the way everyone else sees it. Don't panic. Nobody notices your flaws as quick as you do. In fact, most people won't seem to find anything odd at all. The reason why you pick them out is because you've been looking into a mirror all this time, in where your face has been flipped. Since you've been so familiar with the flipped version of your face, your brain doesn't recognize the actual, unflipped photo in a camera, therefore, picking out mistakes. Keep in mind... It's not you face.... It's your brain. You'll look normal to everyone else in the photo. You won't even be able to recognize your exact same clone. No one will. I look lkke a fucking dead ass racoon in my front camera as well... But that's only my brain's perception. Fortunately, you're not alone! A lot of people have asked us about why they looked hideous on camera. So just relax. Search up "front camera memes" and enjoy reading hilarious memes posted by people with similar experiences.

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I fell down nearly 400 stairs at St.Paul's Station in London as a child and shattered my chin and nose. I still have scars but see them more as battle scars! I used to hate having my photo taken when I was younger but now the scars have become a part of me. I have other scars on my arms too which I see in the summer and a wonky nose. I have a lovely boyfriend who sees me for my personality and strengths. If we get married - which I hope we will - then I will be photographed as I am. Enjoy your asymmetry. You are unique. We all are!

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Hi,

I have a extremely similar case. My jaws are not the same length, one is smaller than the other due to Arthritis that is also effecting my fingers and knees. When I am seen by other people, I look normal but if they really try to look or take a picture of me I look weird. They said they are giving me treatment for it but it does not seem to be working. I want to be a model for the teen parts of my life but I hit a wall because of my face. I have not yet applied for any modeling agency’s and have very low hope for modeling but once they fix my face I hope that I can become a model for the teen parts of my life and if not than I’ll deal with it and it won’t be that big of a deal. But I would like to try. So I wonder if you have Arthritis like me and that is the reason for your face disfigurement.

I’m glad to finally meet someone who shares something with me.

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Welcome to the changing faces community Alcpeace!

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Omg I have the exact same thing on the same side of my face , it makes me feel really insecure , it only shows up if people r taking pics of me and not if I take them of myself on a non flip app like snapchat , is there anyway to hide it ?

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Hello K a t i e - Welcome to the Changing Faces Community. Thanks you for sharing your situation on the board. Just to let you know, you have posted on a very old thread that was posted originally five years ago - this means people are less likely to see it I'm afraid - just the way it is set up by HealthUnlocked. So, we do recommend people starting a new thread as it is more likely to receive comments. Just something for you to consider and we're trying to get the community more connected to each other.

Take care

Changing Faces

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I have exactly the same thing😢

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I feel as though no matter what my face is crooked, in pictures, videos, and I'm afraid that it's noticable in person as well :( I also feel as though it makes me look kind of like a boy and I hate it, some people tell me that I'm pretty and they don't notice it but I feel like they're lying just to make me feel better, sadly it isn't working.

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Hi! Is this still an active thread? Yes, I am the same. Ive experienced the exact same response to having my picture taken. Hope you are doing ok.

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Hi there! I'm not sure if its still active but I've been on it recently. My nose is severely crooked so I have a prominent good vs bad side. But even my eyes and smile don't line up. It is much worse in front facing photos.

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Hi I also have a very asymmetrical face, I had rhinoplasty at 22 to make my nose look less deviated and because my profile looked different on the left than the right but rhinoplasty has left me looking much worse!

I’m 35 and haven’t really had a life, I feel very unattractive and barely leave the house, I have 2 children and rarely go anywhere with them.

I get odd looks and stares from people often.

I saw your photo and think you look attractive, just thought I’d share my story.

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Were you able to find any help? I have the same problem. I wasn’t born with mine. I had a symmetrical face until my fourth baby and I slept in my right side the entire pregnancy and started have TMJ and noticed a lot of migraines. When I lost the baby weight my right side of my face had changes and my eye socket on one side is further back and my jaw elongated. I’m very lopsided and it’s very noticeable. I’d love to know if anyone has had any luck finding something to help.

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I’m 16 and I have the exact same thing and I didn’t think anybody else had it. I can never take pictures from straight on as i think it looks so bad. It’s as though one side of my face is completely sunken my eye droops too and my nose is horrendously wonky. I’f i get photos taken from the bad side I really don’t like them. You’re not alone!!

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My daughter's face was asymmetrical when she was born but it was only nocicable in a mirror. I never noticed it in photographs. It eventually went away. Do you, by chance have any skin issues or issues with areas of the scalp where hair won't go. These seemed to me to be related. She continues with the skin issues to this day.

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Hii

I have asymmetric face same as you and i was so worried about it. I just wanted to know should i worry about this and get medical help? it is actually a noticeable to people.

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