Its been a roller coaster ride the past 3 months with my partner David being admitted to Southmead Hospital,Bristol for 5 weeks,and then being taken to a local care home supposedly for 3 days before coming home,those 3 days turned into more than 2 months because the excuses were, they could not get a care package in place,bearing in mind that David had lost half his body weight,and would'nt eat or talk,he was in a tiny room that was like an oven,and also surrounded by people who were far worse than him,as his dementia is quite mild by comparison,his biggest problem is his lack of mobility,he is bedbound.
Every day I would promise to get him home and I felt so guilty and useless because I had'nt.
After serious words I insisted that I would get him home and would not accept any assistance from the council and social services.
Long story short.....I now have David home,and he's eating well and talking,and already after 10 days he looks more like his old self and I am delighted,and to see him smiling is worth everything.
Seems to me that the council especially are intent on extracting as much money from you as they can,and I am concerned what the final bill will be,and can you believe I even had to pay for an ambulance to bring him home.
I have Lyn who is a care worker come in and I pay her privately,much as I did before,she comes in 4 times a week and the other days I manage very well on my own.
Whether David's time is long or short,he will be in his family home which he loves.
Dementia care in this country falls short of what the worlds 7th richest country should provide.
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secrets22
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I totally agree secrets, we have a long way to go before Dementia care is great for all. I’m so pleased you have David home and things are working well for you both. Xxxx
Hi, I am so pleased that David is home. We had to fight to get my dad home as they couldn't find a care provider with capacity. He was fading fast and losing hope but after much argument on our part we managed to get him home. It shouldn't be that hard and it isn't rocket science that dementia care needs to be so much better. So many people will suffer with dementia and yet the care system is stuck in the dark ages. As you say, how can this be in a supposedly rich country?
Enjoy your time together, it is so important to appreciate the simple things in life.
Hi secrets22,
I'm so glad you have the outcome you wanted which is to have your husband back with you. That's what counts most I think. That we can have an outcome that best takes care of our wants as well as our needs. It's so frustrating when you are thwarted through red tape or because the right help isn't available to make it possible.
Dementia care is patchy at best, and, as always, carers are at the sharpest end, often being burdened with circumstances they find intolerable.
I have my own view on whether we actually ARE the 7th richest nation on earth. On paper our economy might say so, but in terms of the way our citizens are treated, I think we are well down the list when it comes to priorities.
Anyway, delighted that you've had a good outcome, and very best wishes to you both.
It is so hard to get some health professonals to understand just how much people hate being away from home. They like the buzz and bustle of hospitals. We like our homes . I had to do an awful lot of jumping up and down to get Victor home. They said it was for my good and I did not know what I was leting myself in for. . They refused to believe that I knew better that they did because I had been doing it for years and I was determined to give him the one thing he wanted which was tobe in his own home.
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