Dementia: My father-in-law has vascular... - Care Community

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My father-in-law has vascular dementia and we are struggling to care for him and finding how hard it is to get him into day care a few times a week we really are finding it hard.

11 Replies

Have you been in touch with Care for the Carers. I have found them to be very helpful in finding me options and helping me to decide what I would like to do for the best.

BennyCullen in reply to Hidden

Finding it very hard to get advice in Glasgow as 1 department does not seem to know what the other department are doing.Have found out that care homes start at around £800 per week and that was a big shock.His house is in his name but was paid for by a grandson and they reckon they can sell the house and keep the proceeds.

Yes it is hard, isn't it? A sign of the NHS under pressure but that doesn't help you. I wish I could help. Do you have a support group locally. I only discovered today YOU are also entitled to an assessment under NHS guidelines. not entirely sure if this answers your question:

NICE guidelines for dementia clearly state that both people with dementia and their carers should have their psychological needs assessed, and *treated*. Have a look at section 1.8 and section 1.11.2 of this:

Hi I also have Vascular Dementia and from what I see at my support groups that I attend is the new people come with their carer, they stay with the person they brought and sit down together sometimes 3/4 times and reduce the time with sufferer over a period of time, he/she will be settled in more each time and eventually you can run in and run out lol.

Best of luck.

I'm sure if he could, would tell you" Thank you for all your help and I'm sorry for all the extra miles you go " to help him. There a number of little poems aroun the internet and if I remember lol I put some on here.

Also you should be entitled to a 25% reduction in your council tax, check it out and save a bit.


You can also try the Citizens Advice Bureau for advice about money. They usually know the best way to deal with things. My mother's nursing home is £1400 per week!!!

BennyCullen in reply to Hidden

We have been advised to see the citizens advise bureau so thank you for your reply and we will go and speak to them.

Has he had a needs assessment by the local authority? Have you had a carers assessment ? Within this, additional respite support should be identified and they should be helping your father in law to access services

Sadly, resources are stretched so places limited or even closed in some areas which isn't a help

Another option is to talk to some local care homes. Many new homes are setting up day care and trying to work with people in the community. There may be a small charge but certainly worth exploring

Depending on funding, finding a good companionship service might be another way to go

Good luck

Thank you,it seems to operate very slowly in Glasgow whichever way we go to ask for advice but you have helped with your reply.


I don't know about a 'small charge'. My brother in law was quoted £75 for a few hours at a day centre for his wife who has advanced dementia. Not easy when you are on a limited income....

Lynn-Osborne in reply to Hidden

It does seem to vary depending on type of day care and needs of the person.

It is worth talking to the social worker about what respite might be accessible and how it can be full or part funded

Another option to explore is talking to organisations with benevolent groups / funds. They won't fund care but will consider supporting respite at times - or specific one of needs, worth a try

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