Feeling a bit meh today

[iraymond]

Yesterday was a really good day but feeling a bit sad today. I guess it is the journey, good days, less good days. I have a lot to be thankful for but I didn't sleep well last night and I think that has a lot to do with my mood today and the fact I can't tune out of my T.

I think the sleep thing is my weak point at the moment. I have a little "going to bed anxiety" every night. I try to go to bed when I am tired, normally about 10pm. I have the fan on, that normally helps. And I try to relax before sleeping with meditation. But last night I work up at 1:30am and that was that, I couldn't stop focusing on my T. I ended up getting up and working in my office until 5am and then went back to bed, but I only dozed from that point. I am tired today so I guess tiredness make you more stressed, more stress makes the T worse. Vicious cycle. Hopefully, day-by-day I will get better with handling this

Any tips or suggestions, always welcome

Thanks for listening.

[Happyrosie]

My sympathies Ian. I know the feeling! I go to bed when I’m tired -usually midnight or a bit later- and find if I’m awake by three o’clock that could be it! If I’m still awake after half an hour which I’ve spent concentrating on breathing or repeating comforting prayers to myself, I get up and read a book for an hour. Then I usually fall asleep straight away once I’m in my nice warm comfy bed.That’s what works for me anyway! The older I get, the less sleep I get. That’s the price you pay for getting older!

[iraymond in reply to Happyrosie]

Hi Happyrosie, this is so true. After I hit 50 I noticed I started to sleep less. If I do sleep at 10pm, inevitably I will be awake at 5am at the latest!

[Happyrosie in reply to iraymond]

To me a whole seven hours is quite unachievable even when I was fifty - congratulations!

[TMotown]

I can sympathise, I went through a tough time with sleep deprivation, I thought I would never sleep properly again. However I took some advice and now follow a strict sleep regime. I only go to bed when I’m tired, I use pillow speakers with soothing ocean waves playing all night, I also listen to a sleep story on the Calm App which I find distracts me from my Tinnitus.

Invariably if you go to bed assuming you’re not going to sleep then it can be a self fulfilling prophecy. I used to have anxiety about going to bed but thankfully with relaxation and meditation it has settled into a routine

[iraymond in reply to TMotown]

Thanks TMotown. That is a good idea, I have sleep stories on my Oto app, I'll give those a try. I have not tried pillow speaker yet but I am thinking of getting a bluetooth speaker for the bedroom. My wife is fully supportive, she thinks she'll sleep better with something nice and soothing playing softly in the background.

[doglover1973]

Hi Ian. I know the feeling. I don't always sleep as well as I'd like to and still have sad days - a year on. Sleep - or lack of it - affects mood the next day. I think you're handling the situation very well indeed.. It's tough in the early days but things do improve. There are several things you might like to try. Phenergan makes you feel sleepy. 5HTP does too but less so. It's trial & error really to find what works for you.

[iraymond in reply to doglover1973]

Thanks doglover, just knowing I am not on my own really helps. Often all I need is some virtual reassurance from peopke who know what it's like. At the moment I am trying to stay off all medication. I have had a bit of a bad time recently with prescribed meds from doctors. I'm trying to eat well, exercise well and hopefully sleep well (the later being the hardest at the mo).

[doglover1973 in reply to iraymond]

It's a good idea to stay off meds if you can and a great idea to eat well & exercise . The sleep pattern you describe is very normal in the early days. The sound is new so it's natural that you think about it . The brain just needs time to adjust & adapt. I started to sleep better gradually as I got used to the sound. It will happen for you too.

[surreycccfan]

Hi, sorry to hear you are struggling, I can totally empathise as I just couldn't sleep for months when I first had T. I can now say I can sleep well and in fact I am managing my T so well I am back to sleeping with ear plugs so the only sound I can hear is my T (I am at point in my management journey that my T no longer invokes a flight/flight emotional reaction, I habituate and can live well with my T).

• I used a sound generator app (I used ReSound Relief but plenty of others out there). I mixed sounds that (1) I found pleasant and (2) mapped well to my T. Audiologists tell us to map the volume of the sound to just below the volume of your T. As time went on and I felt more 'positive' towards my T I slowly reduced volume until I no longer needed the sound generator

• I tried to use positive reinforcement in relation to the sound from the generator app. The sound I had chosen was beach, waves, and rain, when I would go to sleep, I would listen to the sound and think of lovely holidays I have had walking on the beach. As T creates such a negative emotional reaction, these types of thoughts allowed me to calm down and think about something other than my T

• When I was lying in bed if I felt stressed and my mind was focused on my T I would follow a mindfulness body scan. I found this very calming and did take my mind off my T

• I used BTA support group to help me learn more about T and techniques to move towards living well with T. As I learnt more and managed to reduce the negative emotional reaction to my T I would even say 'hello' to my T when I first settled down to sleep. The reason I did this is I found when I was stressed by my T it was always at the forefront of my mind so I found that if I said hello to it then (1) I had acknowledged it and my mind could move on to something else (2) by saying hello I was reducing my fight/flight reaction to it and this helped me to 'normalise' it for me.

• I tried to follow a good sleep hygiene pattern (maintain a regular sleep routine, avoid daytime naps, don't watch TV or use the computer in bed, no caffeine after 18:00 and as I am a clock watcher I put the alarm clock out of sight so I wasn’t constantly looking at it.

It took me quite a while to get into a better sleep pattern but as I said I can now sleep with my new sound of silence. The BTA has some excellent resources on sleep tinnitus.org.uk/tinnitus-an... and has good links to products such as sound pillows, headbands, etc. In the above link the vicious cycle graphic really highlights how the fight/flight reaction to our T inhibits our sleep. I found by practicing other distraction and behavioural techniques in the day I slowly shifted how I thought about my T (I saw it as less of a threat which took its power away) and in combination with the things I did at night I slowly got back to normal sleep patterns.

I hope the above may help in some small wall. Take care

[iraymond in reply to surreycccfan]

Hi surreyccfan, thank you for your reply. I found your post really inspirational. I too think the way to beat this affliction is through positive actions and positive thinking. I also appreciate your suggestions and I will be trying these over the next few nights. I am trying to develop a good bedtime routine, so these will be helpful I am sure. Thanks again.

[surreycccfan in reply to iraymond]

Glad I could help. It took me well over a year to adjust 'how I thought' about my T. Through a combination of distraction techniques, behavioral reframing and support/fellowship from others with the condition, I realised 'I have T, there is currently no cure, its probably not going away BUT thats OK, I can manage it rather than it managing me'. I wish you luck and don't forget be kind to yourself.

[Acure22]

I think I know what your going through, as sometimes I find night time t difficult to manage too. I take nortriptyline 10mg at night to help with my migraine symptoms.Strangely, they seem to be part of my tinnitus experience ie lightheadedness etc and a “squeezed tinnitus”which almost makes it disappear-however, t always coming back the following day with a vengeance ! N also helps me to sleep which is a helpful side effect. Like you, I find meditation (Mindfulness)helps and I practice “deep muscle relaxation exercises too”- great for relaxing the neck muscles and joints.Best

PS I do try more and more to accommodate my tinnitus and using my aids only when watching tv or socialising. This has made me more tolerant I think.