Morning: Good morning all. How is... - British Liver Trust

British Liver Trust

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Morning

lyn3 profile image
lyn3
15 Replies

Good morning all. How is everyone doing? Not sure where everyone is but whats the weather like where everyone is?Think we had our summer for 2 days. Sun shone and was in 20s here in the uk, but back to cloudy ,grey but still warm.

Up date on hubby, still no change, trouble staying awake some days,other odd days he manages to stay up. Still terrible pains with his lower stomach. Has an appetite but can only manage a few mouth fulls of food when he is able to eat.But the good news is the drs says he is practically health.Yeah go drs.

Me im coping alot better since i became a Christian a few weeks ago ,its so lovely to be able to talk to Jesus and not burden people. If anyone wants prayer in here just let me know and ill add it to my prayer list.

Gods blessings to you all.

Take care

Lyn..xxx

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lyn3 profile image
lyn3
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15 Replies
AyrshireK profile image
AyrshireK

Hi Lyn, sorry to hear that things are just as bad with your 'healthy' hubby. There is obviously something that doctors are missing for him to still be as poorly as he is. Has he ever had an endoscopy to check what's going on in his oesophagus/stomach/duodenum. There is very obviously something even though perhaps not liver related.

Weather here in SW Scotland has been glorious the last few days, grey and wet overnight but yesterday hubby and I went to the beach with my brother, hubby went for a walk along the sands whilst my bro and I hit the water with our kayaks and stand up paddleboard then had a BBQ for tea. A fantastic day.

Hubby and I are still waiting for an appointment for him to go in for an ERCP procedure to clear some gallstones that have become lodged in his bile duct. His consultant rang 4 weeks today to say she wanted this done 'urgently' in the next 4 to 6 weeks so with 4 weeks down I hope it won't be too much longer. Having spent over a year nigh confined to our village we were hoping to get the caravan on the road before they lock us down again.

Glad you have found some comfort in faith and hope it gives you some peace and respite from your daily troubles. I do wish they could investigate your hubby further and stop fobbing you both off.

Best wishes as always, Katie xx

lyn3 profile image
lyn3 in reply to AyrshireK

Hi Katie.Good to hear from you.. Thank you, yes the drs are clearly missing something but they are rubbish at sending him for tests etc...Hes been really poorly (more than normal), I went out today and he rang me saying how ill he feels and that hes had to rush to the bathroom etc. which isnt good for his breathing because he can barely take a few steps without being out of breath.He told me he believes its got to the stage where he actually thinks he is going to die soon. I got home and he said i know your going to suggest the drs again but whats the point? they arent good, i said yes but it needs to be pushed and pushed until they have gone down every avenue, every test done, he said im going to give up booze and see if that helps.(He is litterly drinking next to nothing ) He said ill see how i go from there.Hes had the edos and nothing shows up, but his pains are in the lower area. Ive had two people tell me how their nan/ and thier son both had lung cancer and both had the same stomach pains as hubby has. I give up trying to get him helped now and finding answers.. Between him and the drs i feel im fighting a loosing battle.

Oh i love scotland, went to inverness , will one day visit again. Sounds like fun you had..:)

Hope they manage to sort out his galstones etc not nice having to wait all the time., bless him..and you.

Oh off on your travels where you thinking of going? Hope you manage to get to go some where . Oh lets hope they never bring lock down in again. I know England were supposed to stop it all 21st june but they arent now, not sure whats happening with Wales, i never really take any notice of it, i rely on my daughter to tell me lol.

Take care

Talk soon..

Lyn.xx

Bs1524 profile image
Bs1524

Hi Lyn

Lovely to hear from you and so sorry that you are no further forward with your husband's health. The doctors must see how he is I do feel for the both of you.

We have had a few lovely days although it did feel a bit chillier this morning but he sun is out now and so everything is warming up.

Since Kevin has been taken off the anti-nausea tablets he has felt a lot more like himself no so confused. His lower legs are much less swollen, although his sleep is still all over the place. He still isn't up to even a short trip out which is such a shame with the lovely weather we have been having.

The OT has been out and we are getting some aids to help him and we have been surveyed for a stair lift.

He finally has an appointment with orthopaedics and for some reason they downgraded his urgent referral to routine I hope that isn't because they figure they can't do anything to at least alleviate his discomfort.

So pleased that you have faith to sustain you and give you strength x

lyn3 profile image
lyn3 in reply to Bs1524

Afternoon,,Good to hear from you.,Sounds like our weather at the moment..Awe sounds like kevin is doing slightly better since being off them,how is he now? how you doing?Ill send you our stair lift.:) hubby never uses his. He would rather struggle then sit on it, me i use it to take the washing up or any heavy boxes.:)

Thats terrible how they have taken him from urgent to routine, i mean like sometimes it feels like we are living in the twilight zone,. ha ha

Take care

Lyn.

Bs1524 profile image
Bs1524 in reply to lyn3

I know what you mean about twilight zone. He is doing ok obviously poorly but with a clearer head then before. He often says if it wasn't for his knees he wouldn't feel too bad. We have an appointment now for next month so fingers crossed for that.

Hope you are doing ok?

Pam x

lyn3 profile image
lyn3 in reply to Bs1524

Morning Pam. Awe glad to hear hes able to think clearly, i imagine that helps you alot too. Its hard when their unhealthy in their bodies but even worse when its their brain as well. Hubbys brain is damaged through the alcohol but also through the assualts hes had over the years, bleed on the brain etc, its like being with either a toddler or someone with dementia at times. Its hard, because they get frustrated because they cant do things like they used too.Thats good about the appointment not long left to wait thats good, whats it for ? his knees or something else? Im doing ok thanx, been out having breakfast with friends, was nice to meet with them and be out and about, Hubbys decision to stop drinking was short lived, i knew he didnt mean it so i didnt get excited. What can we do hey?

Weather here is lovely, what about there?

Take care

Lyn.

Bs1524 profile image
Bs1524 in reply to lyn3

Hi Lyne

It's gorgeous here. Gosh I know what you mean they really are a cross between a huge toddler or someone with dementia. The mess that Kevin makes is unbelievable some mornings when I come down (he is awake a lot during the night) I could cry and I am still trying to work full time.

I am so sorry that quitting drinking didn't last that is one thing I am thankful for but I do feel that we are in a limbo I hope he may improve some more but the only feedback I have been given is that it is hard to predict. Meanwhile Kevin says when we know what is happening with him we can look at putting the house up for sale but I don't we are going to know what is happening with him.

The appointment is for his knees I do hope they can do something to alleviate the pain.

So good you could get out and meet up with friends it is so important isn't to keep something for yourself I find the liver disease takes over everything even our own health issues.

I hope you are enjoying your day

Pam x

lyn3 profile image
lyn3 in reply to Bs1524

Afternoon Pam.Whats the weather like today, its been cloudy here all day.But still close.

Yeah def agree with the toddler/dementia part, and yeah its frustrating with the mess in the mornings, i always wonder what dirty cutlery and mess hes left behind, i think they think it all cleans itself sometimes and forget who cleans it, in fact i think they forget all the hard work we do to help them live a reasonably decent life. Thats why i love going to the cafe and having food because its nice to have a man cook for me for a change.(Its twin brothers that own the cafe)

Really feel for you.I didnt think the drinking thing would last, it usually last a few days but this was a few hours, sounds bad but i actually couldnt care anymore.

The house up for sale? where you thinking of moving too?

Awe i hope they can sort out his knee, got to be so painful for him.

Yeah i agree on the takes over for us too. I think sometimes we are so busy taking care of them we forget we need taking care of too sometimes.

Todays been one of those, i want to just disappear days.

I was meeting a friend for coffee this morning on the bus, got on the bus she was saying things to me that were out of order, she had miss read something and blamed me for it.Came home went up to hubby to share with him how she had upset me (telling him this while he was laying in bed, telling me that he felt well today (no pains etc) but he wasnt interested in listening to me, all he cared about was how he was feeling better, i told him i was going to bingo at 4 for my daughters bd, he was oh ill get up soon and go to the pub then if your going out, i said how come weekend after weekend im down stairs most of the time on my own, the moment i let you know im going out to bingo your saying your going to the pub, and hes all so you would rather i was ill in bed then blah blah, typical twist what i was saying...Im so sick of being a mug for him, im close to just packing up and leaving and not telling any one where im going. Malta,caribean, africa, all are sounding so inviting.:).

Hope your having a better day than i am.

Take care

Lyn..

Bs1524 profile image
Bs1524 in reply to lyn3

Hiya same here overcast but warm quite breeze but pleasant. They do twist things don’t they by the time he had finished I am not sure what had happened but I feel like it is my fault.

Since coming off the anti nausea meds he says he feels so much better and so is looking to buy a Z4 car I suggested he check out about driving (he hasn’t been driving but feels himself he says now). I am so disappointed in him all the things that need sorting in the house snd he buys a car why but apparently I am selfish as you say they forget all we do and he forgets I am working as well.

He tells me I have changed when I mention all the years of drinking he gets angry and says I am blaming him I can’t win.

Enjoy your bingo he is just using it to just going drinking making it your fault.

I really hope you have a great time

Take care

Pam x

lyn3 profile image
lyn3 in reply to Bs1524

Hi pam , sorry not replied for a while, things been hectic..How are things with yourself now.? Yeah annoying its selfish to just buy himself the car when there are more important things to buy, why not go buy yourself something, treat yourself, sounds like you deserve a treat.He gets angry because of guilt and so easy to pass the blame.He didnt go out after he was too ill, we talked it over before i went out so no hard feelings between us. 9 of us went out and none of us won anything , ha was a laugh though..I got baptised on fathers day which was lovely.

Hows your hubby doing?

Mines been pretty ill the last few days,more so than normal. Was in a state yesterday and didnt know what to do because he wouldnt let me ring the drs/hospital and he wouldnt let me pray for him ,so just spent all evening praying which helped so much.

Hes been in bed since sunday morning, still there now, i keep checking in on him, and he says ill get up in a bit and then goes back to sleep. He wont go to the drs because hes got a gut feeling its going to be bad news and he would rather not know. I told him it wasnt fair on me because im the one that has to see him suffer and go down hill, but he just goes to sleep in mid sentence.

Hope your doing ok though..Here if you need to talk, Take care,God bless.

Lyn..

Bs1524 profile image
Bs1524 in reply to lyn3

Hi Lyn

So sorry to hear your husband hasn’t been too good. It so hard isn’t and unfair but if you do say anything it seems mean. So he is bury his head in the sane then rather face it and the thing is maybe it is something they can sort for him.

How wonderful for you to be baptised it must be a comfort to have the church to turn to. The power of prayer is a powerful thing.

What a shame you didn’t win anything maybe next time?

My husband has been so much better since coming off the anti nausea medication I am starting to think the HE they thought he had was that all along. He gets very tired and naps on and off all through the day and night although he had a blip last week where he couldn’t sleep at all and that did make him a bit crazy.

I am ok my work are talking about staff returning to the office and I am wondering how long they will continue to let me keep working from home. The suggestion was for staff to aim for three days a week in the office but I really can’t leave him on his own for that length of time. I did wonder about half days in the office but then I would have to make up time when I got back and how would I know when it would be ok to leave him?

I am not going to say anything until they bring it up with me.

Take care

Pam x

lyn3 profile image
lyn3 in reply to Bs1524

Morning pam,, again sorry for a long wait to reply. Lifes so busy i often forget to come on and check on people on here.How are things with yourself and hubby? What happened with work after? Did you manage to work out the hours and days you can do or you still working from home?

Glad to hear he is better coming off the anti sickness. HE is aweful isnt it?

Hows your weather there? its boiling and sunny here.

Yeah the church have been some what a great help, i havent been there the last few weeks, personal reasons.

Hubby still continues to be stuborn in going to the drs, he will agree one min and then say no ill be ok the next, i get hes scared and thats why i dont push him.

Monday this week was an aweful day, he thought he was dieing, he wouldnt let me ring the drs,(and i know some will attack and say oh i would have ignore him and rung them, but unless he speaks to them on the phone its a waste of an appointment that someone else could have had), He wouldnt let me pray for him, he got up, hour later went back to bed,couple hours later got up, hour later went back to bed, he was like that all day and was there till wednesday evening, thursday he got up at 5 pm and was back in bed at 8 because he couldnt stay awake. He tried to get up yesterday got out of bed, went to the bathroom and was exausted so he went back to bed, hes been there since, really hope he gets up today and at least sits out in the garden and get some sunshine on him and fresh air.

I just wish he would have an all over mot so at least i know what im dealing with. But with the way the drs/hospital have been with his diagnosis its a wonder he doesnt want to have any tests done. They say hes got lung cancer one min and then he hasnt, hes got cirrhosis one time and then he hasnt.

My life is an interesting one thats for sure.

Hope you have a good weekend if your able to i know its hard when you are caring for someone but try and stay possitive because thats all that keeps us going hey?

Sending love and hugs..

Lyn

Bs1524 profile image
Bs1524 in reply to lyn3

Gosh Lyn things really have been up and down for you. I think sometimes it is harder being the carer worrying if you are doing right or wrong.

Things have been fairly calm here apart from when he is feeling better he is over doing things and then paying the penalty for it.

I have nothing about my hours yet there was talk of returning to the office but that has all been postponed since the infection rate has been rising. I can retire in January so may just ride it out until then this year is flying by hard to believe we are half way through July already!

It is absolutely boiling here the car read 30 degrees I bet the sales of paddling pools and spas have gone through the roof.

Take care x

lyn3 profile image
lyn3 in reply to Bs1524

Evening Pam,Awe love him..How are you doing ??? Oh wow not long to retire then? Yeah the way time is going so fast you will be retiring before you know it.wow 30, yeah been 29 here today too, and tommorow supposed to be the same . Happy days then, i dont mind this weather but dont like staying out in it.Yeah same here people panic buy here all the time, its rediculas.Plans for the rest of the weekend?

Well i went shopping and came back, checked on hubby, he said im getting up in a bit, when its cooler , i said its hotter in here than down stairs, that was hour and half ago, i told him that hes seeing the dr next week wether he likes it or not, im sick of being in limbo and not knowing what to do and seeing him suffering or sleeping. and if he refuses to see the dr im off, dont think he realises how much its affecting me as well.Maybe i sound selfish but taking the soft route and letting him stay in bed and not seeing the dr isnt working. So we will see monday but he knows im not messing about when i tell him im off.

I asked for friends to pray for him because of how bad he is and they did and next day asked how he was, not once have they asked how i am..

Do you feeling lonely sometimes taking care of hubby? because i know i do alot.

Take care. Stay safe out of the sun.

Love and hugs,

Lyn xx

Bs1524 profile image
Bs1524 in reply to lyn3

Aww Lyn yes it is very lonely made more so by the Covid situation. It is very easy to feel lost in the process obviously all the focus and concern is for the patient and I have often felt reduced to taxi driver and medication dispenser. I find when I am asked how I am I don't know. x

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