My favourite Christmas joke (so far)

3 men die on xmas eve. To get into heaven st. peter says - you must have something on you that represents xmas.

The 1st man flicks on his lighter and says - its a candle. St. peter lets him pass.

The 2nd man jingles his keys and says - they are sleigh bells. St. peter lets him pass

The 3rd man left pulls out a G string and bra.

St peter says - how the hell do they represent christmas?

Man says

They're Carols.

27 Replies

  • Hhhaaaaaaahhhhhhhaaaaahhhhhhhhhaaaa!

  • Great one :D

    Lynne xx

  • Utterly unfunny.

  • If you can,t say anything nice then why do you bother yourself replying ?

  • Hear hear pedantic. Thank goodness most of us have sense of humour :)

  • Hilarious! Have I got competition on the funnies?Keep them coming hypercat we all need a good laugh.

    Richard Cornish

  • Lol Richard I can't claim credit for that one though - a friend sent it to me.

  • Nice start to the day. My offering would be...

    Ask anyone to name the santa's reindeers and most will struggle to get pass Rudolf. Nearly everyone will forget about poor Bruno the brown nose reindeer.

  • Mmmm actually Rudolf is not considered one of the original reindeer. If I remember a quiz question correctly the reindeer are dancer, prancer, donna, blitzen, cupid, vixen, venus. Unless anyone knows different! :)

  • There isn't one called Bruno the brown nose reindeer most people will say but it has been proven to be true.

    Bruno the brown nose reindeer was so named as he's the one that runs behind Rudolf. He can run faster





    But he can't stop as quickly. Merry Christmas

  • Ooops, I wondered where I had left my undies!! enjoy your christmas preparations, everyone! Carol,x

  • :) :) :) lol

  • good one :) gave me a laugh this morning!

  • Nice one Hypercat. xx

  • brilliant good laugh to start the day thanks Hypercat x

  • Hehehehehohoho! that one nearly made me choke on my porridge,thanks Hypercat,keep um comin'! xxx

  • like it..

  • Very merry xmas to all. xxxx

  • Excellent, I needed a chuckle this morning, merry Christmas :)

  • Started my day with a smile. Thanks Hypercat.

    Gina x

  • hehehehhe nice one hypercat just what I needed on these dark evenings,x

  • Not mine wear droopy drawers lol Carole

  • Lol carole :)

  • SO DID HE GET IN ???????..... .NO NICE ONE, I LIKE IT

  • Good one.Will pass this one on

  • Glad you all (except one) enjoyed it. It passed the laugh test when I told it in pub last night. Merry Christmas everyone :)

  • Heehee, love it. More please!xx

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