Day to day is such a difficult way to live your life. We have been married for 5 weeks today and we have 3 of us in this marriage. Myself, my husband and his emphysema. His diagnosis from 3 months ago is severe and his only option for treatment is pain management. He has giant Bulla on his left lung and a smaller on his right. He has been suffering from Pneumothorax which are too risky to aspirate. His Consultant wont consider surgery as the risks are too high. We think parts of the lung have been rupturing and his spit is usually fresh blood. He suffers from terrible fatigue and has to spend large potions of the day in bed.
Today he has a lump under his jawline most probably a swollen lymph node which could be a sign of infection. He spoke to his GP who suggested he keep an eye on it over the weekend and get in touch with them next week if it is still there. He is just so fed up and has gone to the shop just to get out of the house. Of course this means when he returns he will be so exhausted he will end up in bed.
I however have to paint my smile on my face and go to work soon leaving him to cope alone. Our teenage son will be here but he is a typical teenager and not much help around the house. Of course he is dealing with his dad's illness as best he can. My work can be stressful and I hate being away from home. I suffer from Depression and Anxiety which makes it a constant battle to remain strong. I am not feeling particularly strong today but maybe tomorrow will be better.