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Emergency situation but no contact whatsoever with hospital

Thepainterswife profile image

This morning around 11.00 my husband rang me from his bedroom , rushing into him he was able to tell me he was unable to breathe despite taking all his meds . This happened before in January 2020 and he was given a 50% chance of survival so immediately I called an ambulance. The ambulance was with us within 10 minutes and he was taken in, blue lights flashing. I of course was not allowed to go with him Since then ,over four hours ago , the only response I’m getting on phoning the hospital is a recorded message saying the system is currently busy despite calling every 15 minutes . Fortunately my grandson , when we informed him , drove to the hospital and was kindly allowed five minutes with his grandad in the trauma unit and was able to tell me that he was feeling better, able to speak and his oxygen levels had been raised . Had he not done this I would have no idea of my husbands condition 🤦🏻‍♀️ I’m not complaining, I have every sympathy with the hospital workers but it is a horrible situation to be in and I am lucky to have the support of my family , I can’t imagine what it must be like to dealing with this alone 😢 My daughter has been with me , she has gone home to see to her young family and if there is no contact by then she will get a taxi to take Geoffs mobile and hope the staff will give it to him Wish us luck 🙏

70 Replies

I realise that he has only been in hospital for a very short time and obviously attending to his needs and stabilising him are the priorities but surely a simple one minute telephone call to his next of kin,namely yourself assuring you that everything is in hand isn't too much to ask for?Thankfully you have been reassured by your grandson now but this doen't seem right to me?

Best wishes for his speedy recovery.

Ski's and Scruff's


Thank you skis , since writing the post I’ve rang again but same recorded message . It’s frightening to think what’s happening to the country , it’s coming to something when you’re actually feeling grateful that the ambulance even had petrol to get him to hospital! I rang the GP on Friday told her how he was and that he was panicking about running out of Oromorph, her answer was to arrange a phone call from a mental health practitioner on the 13th as she thought anxiety was a big part of the problem 🤦🏻‍♀️ I then said I needed to tell her about his swollen legs to which she replied that I’d already used two appointment times up and would need to make another appointment to discuss that problem ! Tbf I think she was new and she did seem genuinely embarrassed to be ending the call but sadly that doesn’t help us 😢


DJS6 profile image
DJS6 in reply to Thepainterswife

As Ski's said, it totally doesn't seem right to me either....and I think you should keep a record of all of this and complain later (to PALS at the hospital?).Thinking of you...

Hi Painters wifeHow awful of not knowing what's happening surely there should be something in place when people are admitted to hospital. I know they are busy but they can't just leave people wondering, especially those with no other family. Hope your husband gets well soon, take care of yourself 💜 Jane

Thank you Jane , it’s been five hours now and no word since he left with blue lights flashing but my daughter is going up to the hospital within the next hour so maybe we’ll know more then 🤞

What a horrible situation for you and thank goodness for the wonderful support of your family. Pity nobody could spare just two minutes to let you know how your poor husband was doing. Wishing him a good recovery. Love and hugs to you both. Xxx💜❤️🥰🤗

Thank you Sassy , I can’t understand why there is a constant recorded message , have the taken the phones of the hook 🤷🏻‍♀️ My daughters going up to the hospital soon just hope they let her in xx

That’s not right. I do hope your daughter will be allowed in. Thinking of you all. Xxx💕💕💕

Oh how terrible for you not knowing, I'm sure he's being well cared for and everything possible is being done but surely someone could let you know.Hope all well. Xxx

Thanks pegbl , hopefully I’ll know something soon when my daughter goes up to the hospital x

Damon1864 profile image

It must be aweful for you not knowing what's happening, it's a good job your grandson was allowed to see him. I hope they do let him have his phone. I hope he gets better very soon and is allowed home. Please if it's possible keep us updated, we are thinking of you all. Have a good night and take care 😊 Bernadette and Jack 🐕 xxxxxx

My very best wishes to you and your husband, Thinking of you with lots of hugs 💐💐💐💐

A very upsetting situation for you, adding to your worry. I am glad that you got the paramedics out and also that you have the support of your family. I'm sure that your husband is in good hands and I wish you both well.

Thank you My daughter has just rang me from the hospital she was only able to pass over some food and Geoffs phone in the reception and the nurse who went down to collect it said she knew nothing of his condition only that he has just been taken to an assessment ward for tests At least he now has a phone so hopefully I will be able to speak to him soon The hospital phone is still a recorded message but my daughter did say there are queues outside A&E 🙈

Sounds like the hospital are inundated and perhaps a recorded message is better than a phone that just rings.Good to know that your husband is now out of A&E and on the medical assessment ward for more investigations and that your daughter has been able to get his phone to him. He will no doubt feel better for that too. Thinking of you all xx

Thank you , the support from this forum has kept me sane today ! I’ve just spoke to Geoff , he was struggling to talk but receiving treatment and we both feel better now we have a means of contact 😊 xx

I really feel for you and most certainly wish him the best of luck in getting safely well and home to you. Thank heavens your family are nearby.Be sure to mark the phone clearly with your husband's name, d.o.b and perhaps nhs number (on a prescription) so it has the best chance getting to him. Recently my sister was rushed to hospital, a bag containing her phone, glasses- without which she cannot see -, nighties, underwear and a prescription list of her medications went missing. Eventually it was found 4 days later grrr

Thinking of you tonight xxx

Thank you so much for your kind thoughts , he has his phone now and I’ve been able to speak to him he was able to tell me he’s on a ward now on intravenous medication so at least I know he’s being cared for 😊 I’m sorry to hear of your sisters experience being rushed to hospital is traumatic enough without added complications, I hope she’s better now xx

Ah that's better news, hopefully you'll sleep having spoken to him. My sis will be in some time, probably months of rehabilitation after a stroke out of the blue. Only her husband can see her at 2pm for an hour per day, no-one else. Understandable but very hard for her children and sisters 😥

Alberta56 profile image
Alberta56 in reply to peege

Grrrr too. Your poor sister.xxx

I’m so sorry to hear about your sister peege life is so very hard at the moment for so many people 😢 So many of us are dealing with situations we never could have imagined. The only thing that can be said for the past almost two years is that good people have come together to support each other , even people we’ve never met or are ever likely to and I am truly grateful for that . I hope your sisters recovery is as speedy as possible and you and her children will be able to see her soon. I don’t know if I will sleep 🤷🏻‍♀️but I at least know that I can speak to Geoff tomorrow and possibly find out more so I’m feeling much better than I was earlier Sending love to you and your family xxx

Hello ,

I can only imagine your worry. I hope by now you've heard something. I'm so sorry things are so difficult and worrying. Please do let us know how things are. Love and gentle hugs.

Cas xx 🙋

Thank you Cas, now that he is on a ward I have finally managed to speak to a nurse after 20 hours Anyway he seems to be doing ok . It’s been a long , horrendous wait but the signs are looking good 🤞xx

So glad to know it. I hope he will be home very soon. xx 🍀

That is really awful no contact from the hospital surely there would be someone there to answer phones I know they are busy but a receptionist should be there answering the phone it must be terrible not knowing what is going on hopefully your husband has a speedy recovery sending you hugs and prayers x

Thank you Danielmystar , I actually wrote a lengthy reply to you several hours ago and obviously didn’t hit the reply button 🙈😂 Thankfully I’ve found him on a ward this morning so have their extension number and he has his mobile so things are much less stressful today . Thank you for your kind thoughts xx

Your very wellcome hopefully your husband will be home with you soon prayers for you both big hugs please keep us updated x

Sorry to hear about your husband, I hope he continues to get better, and will be home ithyou soon.. It is a very worrying time. Exactly the same happened to me with my husband several times. I was completely alone. Good job your grandson was able to help. I expect you were too preoccupied and rushedto "pack a bag". I have a short check list now. I am surprised somebody didn't phone after he had seen a Dr. and had a dx and a bed.

Believe it or not we had a bag packed and in the panic never thought to get it 🙈 I’ve no idea why no one contacted me , I took a chance this morning and rang the ward he was on last year , he wasn’t there but thankfully the nurse found him for me . I am lucky to have family close by it must be awful to deal with all this alone 😢

This is what happens isn't it. The paramedics usually remind me but we seem to have it down to an art now! I have started taking the view that they will contact you if things get bad, but that doesn't help much if you are worried. All the best Mrs Painter, Lets hope he is back at home soon.

Perhaps if the telephone lines are flooded with callers then the system may default to an automated message. But that in no way helps in your situation when your husband is close to the wire and all you need is a reassuring work he is stable and being looked after. I can't imagine the anxiety you've been through. Maybe you would consider writing a formal letter of complaint to the hospital to see what their reaction. After all, you would be speaking on behalf of hundreds of callers. Best wishes to your husband, and thank God for your grandson and daughters intervention!

I don’t really want to complain as I know they are all under tremendous pressure but as you say there would have been many more people going through the same horrendous situation. When I’m feeling up to it I will try to find out exactly what was going on . Seeing the queues outside A&E my daughter feels it was a case of the system being flooded Personally I think Gps are playing a part , people are going to A&E because they’re not getting the usual service from Gp’s and I know our respiratory team are fed up with doctors passing patients to them for complaints they should be dealing with ( I’ve actually been told this from a respiratory nurse last Friday when I was fobbed off by a GP ) Thank you for your kind wishes 😊

Thanks. I do understand how you feel. As someone said earlier, you would rather all hands be attending on your husband.

I know it’s hard but it’s better that they put all there energies into helping him rather than answering the phone to you it is a good idea to take a mobile into hospital if you can as them when he’s feeling up to it there is nothing like being able to speak one to one

That's an awful situation to be in, I feel for you both, your husbands will be relieved, I'm sure he was missing you by his side, prays an blessings for youse 🙏🏻🙂

How awful for you both. Hope he is now recovering well.

Firstly, I sincerely hope that your husband's improvement continues fully and rapidly in order that he can be discharged and returned to your loving care.The fact that you have wonderful family support does not eliminate the necessity for you to be kept as informed as possible of his condition.

No doubt, those in A&E were fully engaged looking after your husband's and other patients' urgent needs but your needs somehow should be capable of being addressed. Perhaps the hospital's PALS facility will be able to assist both you and other relatives.

Wishing you, your husband and family all the very best for the future.

I hope you will be able to speak to Geoff today and he’s recovering from his awful experience yesterday. Perhaps the hospital will allow you to pay him a brief visit.

I have spoke to him this morning and he sounds much better thank you 😊

That’s excellent news! I’m sure he’ll soon be home😊

So sorry to hear this, it must have been so stressful for you all. Glad to hear you have managed to speak to Geoff at last. Hope he gets well soon.Take care


I know that despair my hubby had a major op in may and I phoned everywhere I was told to but either no one answered or couldnt tell me, eventually I was able to find out at 1am he was in critical care but all those hours of not knowing was torture, eventually critical care let me speak to him on the phone to reassure me so hopefully when your hubby gets his phone he will be able to ring you xx

Oh Canabeans isn’t it awful !! The not knowing is mental torture isn’t it ? He has his phone now so we have been messaging and a couple of short calls today and now that he’s on a ward there doesn’t seem to be a problem in ringing the staff for updates 😊 xx

Yes it is torture but so pleased you can speak to him more it makes you feel more reassured are you not allowed to visit him yet ? Xx

No, no visiting which is worse for him than me . We are able to speak via his mobile at any time now and I just want him to be were he is safe and being treated , which he is and very well treated , being seen by several consultants and having numerous tests but yesterday he said there was only one nurse on the ward trying to meet the basic needs of the whole ward so quite depressing for the patients and incredibly hard work for the poor nurse😢 xx

Ahhh that's so bad the poor nurses are overworked, but it's unfair for the patients if they are stuck in bed at least when visitors came they helped and it made patients happier and recover quicker x

Very true , visitors break the long days up too , Geoff is getting fed up and talking of getting home already 🤦🏻‍♀️fortunately there were more staff today so the ward , he said, was a bit more cheerful x

I had to smile as my hubby is called Geoff too and he wanted to come home after only being in a few days after the op because I wasnt allowed to visit , they ket me visit on our wedding anniversary after 12 of being in and then he was allowed home the same day xxx

😂 typical x

Thank goodness for your lovely supportive family. Hope your husband is better and home soon x

Oh how dreadful. I do hope your husband is getting better and that you are bearing up after that awful shock. Best wishes and virtual hugs to you, your husband and your splendid family.

Thank you , we are all feeling better today including Geoff, it doesn’t seem to have been respiratory failure (as it was last year) , he is on several medications via drips but sounds much better today xx

Thank goodness. Hope your husband continues to improve.

Holding you both in my thoughts ,heart and prayers

Thank you , things are looking better today 😊x

Glad you have contact with your husband and wishing him well and hope he gets back to his normal soon. I’m sure the A&E dept are rushed off their feet and we’re doing their best to stabilise your husband and all others in there . Just a worry as times gone by you’d been there with him.

Take care. 🤗

Yes we’re certainly living in unprecedented times 😢 My problem though was not so much being with him as not knowing his condition . Twenty hours is a long time waiting to hear if your husband of fifty years is going to survive but as you said if it was a choice between speaking to me or treating him then obviously I would have opted for the latter x

I can imagine you are glad that yesterday is behind you. It must have been a real worry for you. So, it's good to know you have spoken to your husband and he is feeling much better today. I understand that nurses are unable to find time, but if they had volunteers who could phone the relatives it would save the stress that you experienced yesterday. Hope hubby is home soon. Take care. xxx😊❤️

That’s a very good idea , it’s very worrying if this sort of thing is happening all over the country . But just thought 🤔would volunteers be allowed in ? are hospital shops , cafes etc still open ? If not even the WRVS helpers won’t be going in 🤷🏻‍♀️

I know our local hospital has opened it's café and small shop, but no trolleys with papers etc., going round the wards, such is the pity. xxx

I can’t understand why they would open a shop and cafe but not do a trolley 🤷🏻‍♀️ I was thinking earlier it will cost me upwards of £13 to get to the hospital and back by taxi to drop off Geoffs beloved sweets and chocolate bars - I think the grandchildren might be called upon again 🤔My grandaughter once put on FB a picture of a stick man walking along and next to it was a stick man with a big round tummy and a fiver in his hand and the caption was “going to grandmas house “. “ leaving grandmas house” well now it’s pay back time 😂🤣 xx

Hope you can round up the grandchildren to take grandad his much needed treats and save you a vast amount of cash for a taxi ride. Good luck xxx😋

Such a worrying situation. Hope everything improves and sending best wishes to you and your family.

So sorry to hear about your husband. Unfortunately I am hearing similar stories much too often. Worrying times. Thinking of you all & hope things improve soon💙

It is frightening when you can't be in touch with your love ones when they face a crisis. So very glad to hear your husband is feeling better and wishing him a speedy recovery and home soon.

I cant believe what a state the country is in. The hospital receptionists are not giving help to the people in A & E so can find no excuse for not answering the phones, even if there is a shortage due to covid the ward staff could at least inform families of the situation. I am glad you have now spoken with hubby and hope he will be back home soon x

I'm late but I wish you all the liuck possible , I hope by now you have been able to speak to your husband

I have thank you 😊 x

I hope you get to see your husband and that he improves quickly.

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