End stage copd update

[Jools1966]

Update, mums gone progressively worse since I wrote my post about end stage symptoms.

She’s not waking much, phoned ambulance 3 times since Friday. Nothing much they can do when they come out. Last night they upped the oxygen slightly, she’s a retainer and has a cpap but is now refusing that,

I think she’s given up her fight, she is a very strong willed person and knows what she wants lol.

Haven’t been able to rouse her this morning to take her regular meds.

Last night she woke a bit agitated asking for family that weren’t in the room, like she knows.

Mum was only diagnosed at end stage in November. So been quite lucky I suppose that she’s not suffered for too long. She’s had lung cancer and missing some of one lung so that’s not helped.

She’s not managing to eat or drink much, but we keep moistening her mouth for her.

We are hoping to get hospice at home in place Monday. If she lasts that long, Thankyou everyone for your messages of support and advice. I really appreciate it xxx

[Damon1864 Volunteer]

Hi Jools, thinking of you and your family at this upsetting time, and sending lots of love to your dear mum. My prayers and thoughts are with you all😪 Bernadette xx

[Jools1966 in reply to Damon1864]

Thankyou so much x

[hypercat54]

Oh dear Jools, not good. Try seeing if she will take a drink, ice cream, and fruit. Thinking of you. x

[Jools1966 in reply to hypercat54]

Struggling to rouse her for anything today, but ice creams a fab idea if I can get her to take anything x

[hypercat54 in reply to Jools1966]

Both my parents would take ice cream as their mouths were very dry and this eased it. Try spoon feeding it if she hasn't got the energy to eat.. x

[Jools1966 in reply to hypercat54]

I will try, I have been sucking water into a straw and putting in her mouth.

I can’t get her to take her meds, but I suppose At this stage it’s not too much of a concern xx

[Hacienda]

So Sorry Hun, As you say Your Mum knows what she wants. She wants her family with her Now. Talk about the Good things growing up , she will love to hear that from you all. Be strong for your Mum & Yourself Dear Jools. Sending my Heartfelt Love & Prayers. XXX

[Jools1966 in reply to Hacienda]

She used to sing a lullaby to us as children, I sing that to her 😊

[Hacienda in reply to Jools1966]

Yes Hun, she will Love that, Though Heart Breaking for you, Just do your Best as I know you will. Much Love to you & Your Dear Mum. xxx

[sassy59]

Hello Jools, so sorry to hear about your dear mum and hope you get hospice support tomorrow. Thinking of you all and hope you can get mum to take a drink or some ice cream as hypercat suggested.

Thinking of you at this difficult time. Xxxx

[RoadRunner44]

Yes, this is a time many of us can relate to. My mother in law died with us and your post reminded me how she used to call out to former family members.. The nurse who called each day actually said to try not to rouse her and just let her drift away comfortably. I used to wet her lips with a sponge but if she wants more you will recognise the signs. How lovely your mother is able to be with the people who love and care for he, at home, during the end of her life. My thoughts are with you all.

[Hidden]

Hope you manage to find a suitable hospice for her final days.

[cofdrop-UK]

Dear Jools,

You and your dear Mum are in my thoughts and I hope tomorrow you will find a plan which will bring comfort to both you and your Mum.

Love cx

[pegbl]

Dear Jools, . I was with my mum and I used to just wet her lips with a sponge and let a little water dip onto her tongue, and sat with her holding her hand. My prayers and thoughts are with you. Xxx

[Hidden]

Bless you and your Mum. I hope that she is in no pain and I am sure you will have her comfortable. Xx

[Caspiana]

*HUG* 💜

[Hidden]

Bless you, I was with my mum and I used to wet her lips if she needs more you will know, praying for you and your lovely mum. Take care. 🌺xx

[Katinka46]

Sorry to hear this. Very hard for you all.

You are doing everything you can for her. She is lucky to have you.

Xx

[grannyk3]

Jools1966, 💞hugs💞You're fortunate to be able to be with mum during this time. Brings tears to my eyes being witness to so much love...

grannyk 💜

[Echoblue]

Thoughts with you and your Mum. You really are doing everything possible to fulfil her wishes. You can ask no more of yourself than that. Singing the lullabies is a lovely idea. Hugs to you and your family over this difficult time x

[Amanda3011]

So sorry to hear this Jools but you are doing everything you can and I’m sure she will appreciate that .. the ice cream may help and also dribbling a wet sponge on her tongue sending you hugs at this difficult time xx

[teenieleek]

Your mum is fortunate to have you, you’re doing your best and that really is enough. She will know you’re there and that’s what matters.

[robh1]

My wife died last May at home

Yes keep her lips wet with a sponge

She also enjoyed a G&T and I gave her some on a sponge which she enjoyed

Sounds strange but was what she wanted

Talk to her--she wills still be able to hear you

Hopefully it will be peacefull

[robh1 in reply to robh1]

Sounds like it is very near the end

Best to let her go peacefully at home

I know that is what my wife wanted

Don't be afraid

I was amazed how peaceful the end was

x

[Jools1966 in reply to robh1]

I am afraid. Xx

[chalkie222 in reply to Jools1966]

Natural to be afraid. Dont fight it just hold her hand xxx

[robh1 in reply to chalkie222]

Just try to make the most of final moments-you will remember them for ever

[Jools1966 in reply to robh1]

I have cherished it and she’s now gained her wings xxx

[lejones93 in reply to Jools1966]

im so sorry for your loss xx

[robh1 in reply to Jools1966]

So sorry for your loss-she will now be at peace--no more pain x

[powderpuff]

Dear Jools 💕

I’m so sorry to read this & will be thinking of both you & your dear Mum.

I hope you take comfort that you’re doing what you can - it does always seem we should be doing more at times like this but really just follow your Mums lead.

Singing to her is lovely as is talking, even nonsense! Your Mum may even appreciate you laying on top of the bed & hugging her. My Father seemed to like the comfort & close contact.

With love, 💗

[Spring1]

Thoughts are with you Jools, very difficult time for you , hospice from home will really help you I’m sure. Try t on take care of yourself xx

[Knittingnora55]

Dear Jools1966,

I am so sorry to here your mom is poorly I hope and pray god willing things will get a bit easier for you and your mom x

[chalkie222]

Sorry to hear this jools. Sounds like maybe her final journey may not be far away. Reminds me of my mum.

Keep going stay strong sending love xxx

[Oshgosh]

Your mom is very lucky to have you.

I hope you can get hospice at home involved tomorrow.

Please don’t be frightened.im thinking of you

[cales]

Heart goes out to you xx

[WindsweptRissa]

At the care home I worked at, when people were no longer able to drink, we used to swab their mouths with things that looked like large cotton buds soaked in pineapple juice. You could ask your community nurse or doctor if you could have some, or if not a sponge soaked in pineapple juice.

[Shirleyj]

Sending you love and hugs (((💗))) x

[Izb1]

Just be with her, hold her hand and tell her how much you love her, talk about things that have happened. Dont worry about her meds, at this stage it is not important and ice cream is a great idea. Thinking of you x

[jackdup]

So sorry to hear how things are going and sadly there simply is no easy way to get through this time. I just pray things will be peaceful for your Mom.

[Dedalus]

Hope you can get the hospice at home set up soon, as you and your mum need the help. All best wishes to you both going forward x

[Hacienda in reply to Dedalus]

Hi Hun, Just to update you, Jools Mum Passed Yesterday, she has put a post on. . Best wishes. XXX

[Dedalus in reply to Hacienda]

That is so sad. Thank you for the update Hacienda. I'll check for her most recent post xxx