Kidney trouble.

After every single blood test

My doctor asked for more

Three within a fortnight

I was keeping score

Finally I got a text

Doc would like to see

Me at his surgery

When convenient that might be

So off I went to see him

Wondering yet again

Which part of me had dropped off

Or had started to complain

This time it was my kidneys

Complaining of their lot

Too much salt they're saying

And happy we are not.

Now one thing that I never do

Is put salt upon my food

Except for one exception

To which I'll now allude

But first I ask the question

As a tear from my eye drips

Can life be worth still living

Without salt and vinegar on my chips?

[Caspiana]

Oh Don. 😞 Sorry to hear this. And you are so right chips with no salt and vinegar?? Almost criminal. xx 😏

[Katinka46]

So agree with Caspiana. I’m sure enjoyment of food is more important than pampering your kids.

Love

Kate xxx 🧂🍟

[Hidden in reply to Katinka46]

I was quite used to hearing my kids complaining, but not my kidneys. They have never been mention before except in connection with steak and pudding. 🤔

[Katinka46 in reply to Hidden]

It’ll be ready for you whenever you get yourself over here. But I do believe in seasoning it well. Bugger the doctors.

[sassy59]

Dear me Don, that’s not right! Just be frugal with the salt cellar and enjoy your chips. Watch that hidden salt in food though.

Wishing you well. Xxx 😘💖😘💖

[Hidden in reply to sassy59]

I think ready-made meals are the culprit. I’m going have to learn to read the contents labels on them which have always been double Dutch to me. 🤭

[HungryHufflepuff in reply to Hidden]

It is the ready made meals. I don’t know why they contain so much salt. I don’t put salt on food and hardly use any in cooking. But, recently more and more I’m eating those ready made things which seem to contain so much salt and fat that I wonder if there’s room for any other ingredients in there.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Evil things. Being housebound I have ended up watching alsorts. I've been using microwave ready meals for at least a couple of years as most days now not able to cook. I had no idea how much salt and sugar is in these things until I accidentally saw a program about ready meals. OMG I also love salt and vinegar on my chips. One ready meal has enough salt for at least 4/5 bags of chips. I know what I would prefer. I have half a spoon of sugar in my tea. One ready meal has a week's worth of the amount of sugar I would normally use. No more ready meals for me. Chip butties and a mug of tea for me. I will make sure to have a chicken salad in between my glasses of wine 🐔🥗🍷😊

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

My trouble is i’m hopeless in the kitchen, I was never allowed in there when my wife was alive. 😟

[2greys]

Chips, I don't eat them very often now, but they are the only thing that I put salt on.

[Hidden in reply to 2greys]

Right, you can actually hear them crying out for salt 😧

[Lyd12]

I like tomato sauce with mine, guess that is just as much salt, if not more?

[Hidden in reply to Lyd12]

You do surprise me. As Mark R Slaughter said:

Oh how I crave for fish ‘n chips:

Our fine cuisine of world renown.

I dined on such a subtle dish

When QEII received her crown.

Oh how I need some fish ‘n chips;

I'll queue in pouring rain or snow!

What better way to warm my hands,

As soggy chips make fingers glow.

We Brits are famed for culinary finesse,

Like steak ‘n kidney pud no less;

Wondrous tripe; cottage pie;

Bangers and egg in lard to fry!

But fish ‘n chips - the crowning glory -

A dish to trounce the great kebab!

You think I care for chicken masala?

It's cod and chips that grow my flab.

Oh how I yearn for fish ‘n chips,

All poshly wrapped in the Daily Star,

Then caked and drowned in salt ‘n vinegar -

And stinking out my brand new car!

[Izb1]

Chips without salt and vinegar, yep, criminal, no other word for it. Another thought Don, do you drink enough water????? Seems to be a failing as we get older. I know, another thing to add to the list ha! xx

[Hidden in reply to Izb1]

They put me on Furosemide, the dreaded 'water tablets', I drink lots of water and pee for England! I'm a walking water filtration system!

[Izb1 in reply to Hidden]

Ha!ha!ha!ha! Sorry to laugh Don but this had me reeling and even worse having the dreaded water tablets, hopefully this will water the salt out if your system, dont mean to make light if the situation, but you are so funny x

[Candyred]

Aww brilliant! No point having chips without lashings of salt and vinegar .. what about low salt? Or is that just as bad? 🤔 huge hugs my friend xx

[Hacienda]

Hi Don, After all these Wonderful Years of Fish n Chips with salt n Vinegar, Why Oh Why does a GP go and spoil it all. Just carry on as you are, we are all only here once. Mmmm Roll on Friday.....

[Hidden]

I agree, if things get really bad I'll see if Skis with swap one of his kidneys for one of my lungs. 😉

[SquirrelsHolt in reply to Hidden]

Now that's a plan if ever I've heard one! Seriously though(only for 2,seconds.. too much salt isn't good so even a pinch less is helping your or Ski's kidneys!!!)

[SquirrelsHolt]

WHAT !*!*!* Mr.D not allowed the "luxury" of putting salt on his chips!*!*!* I'm not impressed. I'm sure you're not a happy man on hearing that news?

[Hidden in reply to SquirrelsHolt]

I have a problem with my hearing, especially when at the doctors. 😉

[SquirrelsHolt in reply to Hidden]

Yes, o can see you probably totally misheard the Doc when he said,...." Would putting bolts through your hips,help?" I mean what Doctor worth his SALT(lol) would mix up 'bolts' with 'salts' and 'hips' with 'chips'? I ask you?

[Pantani in reply to Hidden]

I always forget what the doctors say the moment I leave the surgery. We have been spoilt today Don with two rhymes. I always read your rhymes to my wife, she thinks your odes are great.

[Hidden in reply to Pantani]

Only one of those two poems is mine (the better one 😉). Please give these flowers to your lovely wife. 💐🌹🌼🌷

[CELAT06]

Soooo agree, brilliant as usual. X

[hypercat54]

Oh dear Don. I try to avoid salt but do still put it on chips! There is a lot of salt in many foods we eat though including things like bread, so investigate and either cut down or even cut out foods like this. x

[Hidden]

I suppose I must. It's usually the Sister that tells me off about my eating habits in relation to my type 2 diabetes but now the doc has joined in about my kidneys. I know at 87 something is going to finish me off soon, but I don't want to start losing toes and feet like some of my friends did before they popped off. COPD gets forgotten amongst all this lot.

[Burs]

Hi don-1931. I have so much vinegar on my chips that it makes inside my mouth really sore, but i still do it everytime !!! I try to have less but it tastes too good. Loved the rhyme. maybe a few grains less? Love burs xxx

[Hidden in reply to Burs]

I’ve never heard anything bad said about vinegar, I believe it’s very good for gout which I don’t have but some friends do.

[Hacienda in reply to Hidden]

I was Buying expensive treatment for my Big Toe nails, They had turned yellow, That was a few years ago, Google, not my favourite place, But told me "White Vinegar" treats and heals, ever since using I have lovely white Toe nails. The cost of White Vinegar 27 pence, Got to try it if you have Nail Fungus. Good on Chips also. The Vinegar I mean, HAHA xxxxx

[Hidden in reply to Hacienda]

You nearly had me trying nail fungus on chips there! 😧

[stamford1234 in reply to Hacienda]

Thanks for the toe nail advice. I had planned a diy pedi tomorrow

[stamford1234]

That's a difficult one Don