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NEVER OUT OF MY MIND

hope132 profile image
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Hope everyone is doing ok.Most of the time my breathing is 100%.sometimes i feel a slight amount of trouble but i am not ever sure if its my mind or its real.there are times when i take a puff of my inhaler when i do not need it to relax my mind so i can stop thinking about it,is this normal? i want to move back up north soon cause my favorite thing to do in life is be in the mountains and woods fishing.just the thought of me someday not being able to do this completely freaks me out.the dr diagnosed me as mild although my fev numbers are in the mid to upper 60s my symptoms are for the most part fine,so he said he has to take into account my lack of symptoms and my fev number and considers me mild.i just do not know how to rid my mind of fear.i went a month without even looking at an inhaler and after 1 month i percieved a very slight problem and fear and anxiety takes over.all i ever think about is i have got to be able to be in my woods and mountains and if i ever cant i wont make it.its like a loop in my head everyday that never shuts off,ever.my dad who is 83 has copd and his lung function is 20% and he is on oxygen 24 hrs.he smoked 16 years longer then i did till he was 73 .i quit at 57 4 months ago.but he also never ever leaves my mind.the dr told me you are not your father and as long as you never smoke and take care of yourself you can basically stay where you are.people on here have told me this is possible although i read its progressive i have also read at my stage with no more smoking ever ,proper diet and exercise this is possible.this also is a constant loop in my mind that never stops.any suggestions on how to live more normally would be appreciated,cause in my humble opinion living this way is not good and not normal.

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hope132
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10 Replies

It may benefit you to get on an anti anxiety med. I’m also 57 stage four Gold grade D. Fev1 @ 25%. Compared to me you are quite healthy. We are all going to die from the moment of birth. That’s the way it’s always been. No one lives forever. Your dad is above the average life expectancy age now. My guess is you will live above the average persons life expectancy as well. Can’t ask for anymore than that really. A med will control your panic and you can enjoy life more.

Shancock profile image
Shancock

I agree your dads age is good, yours will no doubt be too. Your not smoking and just be healthy eat lots of fruit and veg, drink water get some exercise and you can stay where you are for many years to come.

I sometimes have a puff on my asthma reliever when I probably don't need it either, just to make sure!

in reply to Shancock

Hi Hope132,

Your fev levels are still good and maintainable, focus on the positives. Maybe learn about mindfulness and live in the here and now there are lots of books on the subjec t, i also meditate regularly and that helps to clear your mind and relaxes the body. Try not too dwell too much and keep a PMA xx

I have the same thing- feel like an issue then the anxiety multiplies it

Benzodiazepines help, but doctors are getting really reluctant to prescribe them in the US

Ergendl profile image
Ergendl

Try to keep your mind occupied with things that take you into the "zone" where time stands still, things that are of real interest to you. Anxiety feeds on an underused mind. Mindfulness is a great discipline to try to learn, staying in the moment, appreciating the good things around you. My favourite mindfulness subject is my tabby cat Tinker - I can sit for ages studying the gradations of colors in his black, grey, amber and white stripy fur, admiring the black edging fur around his eyes, mouth and nose, the way he moves and how easily he sleeps.

christina1947 profile image
christina1947

Hi hope123 the whole world can see where you coming from a family member had lung cancer and I was constantly looking for signs in myself it never left my mind. Believe the doctor because doctors do not give out faults hope. My fev1 his 69% and I do have symptoms sometimes coughing and mucus but I am not even going back for diagnosis just going to keep away from any kind of smoke eat well exercise take supplements. Think to my self how lucky I am to have got away so lightly after years of smoking a lot of people don’t find out until it’s too late to do something about it.Take care xxx

hope132 profile image
hope132 in reply to christina1947

am i really doing something about it.i have read 2 things one you cant stop the progression and 2 if you are mild or even mild to moderate you can with no smoking proper diet and exercise.i know with age your lungs naturally decline its human.people on here have told me they have actually improved there fev the dr drew a line on a paper and said you can stay on this line your entire life with no smoking and care.people have told me on this site they have been mild for over 10 years.all i want to do is go back north and be in the mountains fishing.its my favorite thing in life.if i cant i wont make it and the fear is terrible.money is an issue as always but i feel i need to go back i live in florida and i hate it with a passion.if someone could tell me you be able to walk the wilderness till you die im happy but i know there are no guarantees in life.the frustration of not being able to get in my car and go home is very bad but i am planning on leaving in the spring cause i feel i am living on borrowed time and i want my woods as soon as possible.we are all living on borrowed time from day 1 i just feel like mine is much shorter ,however i dont even know this.for all i know i could be breathing fairly decent when im 75 and fishing at the reservoir or the complete opposite and the anxiety just is terrible.

hope132 profile image
hope132 in reply to christina1947

p.s. i never cough and you cant even fill a tablespoon with the mucus i have brought up over the last 4 months.is this weird ? my boss has copd and his cough is the worst i have ever heard in my life it sounds like he is about to cough up a lung and it goes on all day and the man still goes outside for a cigg once in awhile crazy huh.but as i said i never ever cough and almost never have any mucus.is this unusual if you are suppose to have copd.

shadow4me profile image
shadow4me

Wish I was where you are my lung function is 32pc and I have asthma on top off copd ACOS try not to use your rescue inhaler when not needed has can cause anxiety one off the side affects,If I was you I would go for the woods and mountains now and enjoy has even without lung disease we all get older and more decrapid and regret not doing the things we loved when younger live your life while you can xx

Vonnie50 profile image
Vonnie50

Hi Hope, think we could be twins I feel the same. Constantly every single day. I am on antidepressants but it’s still there constantly, feel like knowing has ruined my life. I had given up smoking over 4 years when I found out this February. I early read things anymore online as feel it makes me worse. I wish we could all find a way to cope with this. Best wishes Yvonne xxx

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