My Daddy: Hello, my father has end... - Lung Conditions C...

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My Daddy

Dawny1962 profile image
15 Replies

Hello, my father has end stage COPD, as a family we are all supportive and coping with it however, i have noticed over the past week that my dad has started sleeping for very long period of time..is anyone else in this situation... any advice please , how much longer can he go on like this ? X

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Dawny1962 profile image
Dawny1962
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15 Replies
Stumpy55 profile image
Stumpy55

Hello Dawny1962, and welcome to our forum. As you know we all have various lung conditions so we can all offer you friendly advice and talking from experience. I have end stage copd like your dad, and the simplest of things that require energy can tire you. Things that healthy people take for granted becomes an effort. That said, as long as your dad follows medical advice with medication and regular visits to the heart and chest clinic, then he should carry on living a good life with miner adjustments . try not to worry too much Dawny , just carry on being the good supportive family that you are. Take care and please keep Intouch with us? 🌹xx

Dawny1962 profile image
Dawny1962 in reply to Stumpy55

Thank you Stumpy55, i appreciate your reply. Unfortunately, my Dad is coming to the end of his very long and tiring journey as he has battled with COPD for the past 20 years, he is on 24/7 oxygen at home via nasal specs and since his last admission to hospital (2 weeks ago) he hasn’t attempted to come downstairs. He has taken to his bed - something new for all of us. I have been by his side since the beginning and have seen his marked deterioration over the last 2 weeks - guess I am looking for a miracle which isn’t going to happen. Thank you again for taking the time to reply xx

Stumpy55 profile image
Stumpy55 in reply to Dawny1962

I'm so sorry to hear your news, I wish you and your Family peace of mind in the knowledge that you have supported your dad throughout his illness and there is nothing more you could of done. God Bless your dad and his loving family. Please keep Intouch with us, we are here for you any time you need us. 💐xx

John_Keegan profile image
John_Keegan in reply to Dawny1962

My COPD hasn't reached anywhere near that stage yet, but I already find that the restrictions to my activity make it difficult to do many of the interesting things I used to enjoy. As a result life tends towards boring. One of my escapes is to lie down on the settee in my study, and doze of, whenever the mood takes me.

Sleeping, or dozing, is one of the alternatives, when you can't think of anything else to do. Personally I plug my cannula up my nose, switch the computer on and proceed to upset people on Twitter.

It might be worth giving thought to what it is that your dad might like to do, that doesn't involve physical exertion and see if there is a way to make it more accessible to him. All the best in your efforts.

RibvanRey profile image
RibvanRey

Hello Dawny1962. Welcome to the community. I hope that by reading some of the posts here that they can help you to get your head around this difficult period.

I too have final stage lung problems. I long ago stopped visiting clinics or doctors. They visit me. I don't have the energy to go visiting anyone on a time table. I consider myself lucky if I feel well enough to get taken out 2 or 3 times a month. Even then being driven for 30 min and taken for a 30 min push around in public before a 30 min ride home is a completely exhausting experience. I have a drink once I get home and then I am put back to bed for an hour or so of sleep. My carers never leave me sleeping for more than 90min as my outings are always in the afternoon and my nap boosts me ready to get up for dinner.

I too have been on oxygen 24/7 for about a decade. I manage to be up out of bed for about 8 hrs per day. I would have thought that your father's doctor would feel free enough to tell you if it would be good for the family to encourage your Dad to get up rather than staying in bed. Personally I would make an appointment for you to have a chat with the doc about your Dad. I know doctors are big on confidentially but I had to talk to my Mum's doc about her because of not knowing what to do with her because of her MS. He was happy to give general guidance. Just not personal medical details.

The more your dad lays on his lungs the more difficult it will be to breathe and the more difficult to cough up the gunk. So this is likely to get more frequent infections.

Being up, even sat watching birds through the window. Even watching the television. All is better than constant bed.

HTH. Rib

Caspiana profile image
Caspiana

Hi Dawny1962 .

This be a very big worry for you. I know when my dad was sick , I had what must be similar feelings to you. I think we feel things slipping away and we can't stop it. My dad had end stage renal failure. We all did our utmost but he was just too tired.

It is important to get support. Not just for him , but for you. Do you have a palliative care team? If you don't it may be good to ask his doctor about it. If negotiating the stairs is difficult, would it be possible to move his living quarters downstairs? That way he will see everyone and possibly be less isolated and you all can keep an eye on him too.

This is hard. I know and understand. Please don't try to do everything yourself. Do get support, you will need it.

Thinking of you,

Cas xx 🌸

Ergendl profile image
Ergendl

((((Hugs)))) Dawny1962.

mumofmums profile image
mumofmums

I . Send all my love to you and your dad. I seen my mother. Inlaw. Got thorw this . A few years ago. It was so sad as nobody now what to say or do .but give as much love now . And if you have to read to him or tell story about when you were young. I promise. He will love the fact you are there as it is . Scare. God bless you .love from scotland

Alfiebax2 profile image
Alfiebax2

Aww Dawny 1962 you certainly have a lot on your plate at the moment .Not only that but the distress of watching your dear Dad going downhill daily , isn't good for you mentally .

My Mum who has now passed took to her bed and wouldn't get up for anything except to go to the loo .My father phoned me in tears so myself and my daughter went and spoke to my mum............then we physically got up .After a few hours she started to feel better I think she had just forgotten what it felt like to be downstairs as she had early onset dementia . I feel you have to get your Dad's doctor involved as it's not doing him or you any good .I wish I could wave a magic wand to make it all better for you .

PS im on stage 3 COPD and about to have an op on my lungs . please keep us posted on your father's health and we are all here to talk to .

Much love Babs ❤️❤️❤️ xxx

Jollj profile image
Jollj

Hi dawny,I lost my mum 4 years ago through this horrible disease,after nearly 20 years of struggling and deterioration of her general health,we moved her bed downstairs,not ideal but in doing so it gave her,with a little persuasion from both myself and my younger brother, something to look forward to.

We used to take her out for short trips when she felt strong enough,sometimes we had to be very firm with her as she wouldn't move for days at times, but as has been already said,lying down for long periods only clogs up the system and makes things worse,it really is difficult i know but we now have lots of lovely memories rather than those of her just sleeping in her bed.

Good luck and enjoy the remainder of you time together,you won't regret it.

mskpjb profile image
mskpjb

Hi Dawny, I can't add anything more than others have said but just wanted to let you know that you, your family and your dear Dad are in my thoughts. Sheila xx

Offcut profile image
Offcut

I think all has been said but keep positive around him as it will help. Try and have a very deep talk over how he feels and then try and change the negative to a positive!

Be Well

donut43 profile image
donut43

This is a problem. Firstly be sup portative as much as you can. Secondly keep him interested in things and to move about as much as possible, give him a high pillow and try to do the breathing exercises at regular times. You may be doing this already . good luck.

Dan

Dawny1962 profile image
Dawny1962

Just switched on and read through all your fabulous messages, lifted my spirits in many ways. Thank you all so very very much, its comforting just knowing that there are others out there going through similar situations. God Bless you all x p.s. Dad getting up today to watch the football xx

Spacecat1 profile image
Spacecat1

It could be medication and the heat won't help.also afraid age as well makes a difference

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