British Lung Foundation
36,514 members43,736 posts

Well that’s it

What a time am having looking after dad with mum WELL this past week as been horrendous 24 hours of dad going toilet ever hour on the hour DURING the day eve is fine BUT am sure even a saint WOULD struggle with no sleep 💤 at a night

As it’s just the same every hour and even every half hour.

Is mean how lack of sleep makes you short tempered SO it’s time he’s social workers come up with solution ONE where carrier sits with dad of a night.

How that works well ITs one for social worker and dad’s carriers budget to sort AS all I know WE can not function 24 hours a day careering.

I would not mined but was ok when dad would sleep but looks like that as ended as he As not slept proper for ages SO how he dose that is beyond me BUT am not well enough myself not to sleep.

So seeing social worker today and seeing dad’s doctor about this lung cavity as I want doctors to test dad’s sputom

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Sounds as if you need overnight careers at the very least to help your Dad and ensure that you and your Mum get some sleep.

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Hi defo agree with you there is horrendous really and my mum not thrilled about over night carrrers BUT like I said needs must ULESS she as better idea

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You really do need help JAS as that all sounds too much for you and your mum. I hope that Social Services come up with a solution today and the doctor tests your poor dads sputum.

Thinking of you all. Xxxxx

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Hi sassy is a joke way things are now tiering really dad as only one speed and walks into everything EVEN empty room he would walk into wall BUT this no helping him as it’s everyone else’s fault

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Very sad really but dementia is a cruel disease. Xxxx

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very sassy after seeing it 1st hand, cruel,

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Yes me too, mother-in-law has Alzheimer’s and vascular dementia. She’s 86 today. Xxxx

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What a very difficult time you are having JAS. Would you be able to get your dad a couple of weeks of respite care? Neither you nor your mum can go on like this, and you will all be very ill soon. I do hope you get something sorted out soon xx

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Hi have thought about respite but don’t think it’s answer really.

Is hard but guess it’s only what others are going through

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Respite may help to tide things over until you have an overnight carer in place. x

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Hi mrsmummy social worker said be no overnight carer ONLY respite or home SO dad’s staying at home really.

Given austerity you have to put up battle through lies as well care these days.

But all have my day really

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When my Dad was like that Marie Curie nurses came & sat through the night with him 3 times a week

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Hi I don’t know what’s going on really THINK a lot is but think we will be last to know

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You can’t care for him without sleep. From my experience, social services will happily let you carry the whole burden of care, no matter your own state of health, until you draw the line. So you have to be prepared to say “no” (you don’t have to actually mean it but they won’t know that.) Think of the money you’re saving them by your dad not being in a care home!

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Hanne2 is quite right, and this is another case of putting on your ready to argue hat and you are good at that. But if you accepted respite care at least you and your mum would have some rest and be able to plan more easily. What about his GP, can they help? All the best xx

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Sorry you and your Mum are having such a struggle Jeff. Others have given good advice so I hope you get some help soon. Sheila x

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very sorry to read that, as lack of sleep can drain us,, my sister is in home for dementia, as last resort her hubby could not cope , no more, but is up there each day till tea time, horrible what life throws at us, been to see her and im mum, she thought ok by me, even though im way younger than her, other sister who as the same as me, was her daughter, sad times JAS,

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