I can't be bothered any more.

My life has fallen apart don't honestly think I can carry on. I know I have support but I now know there is no understanding of how this illness makes me feel. Walking away from everything seems the only way out.Sorry for being a pain just needed a rant.

47 Replies

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  • Sorry to here this mate, but i always think to myself there are plenty worse of than me and just carry on.

  • Just having a rant, you here are some many people who are worse off than me .xx

  • i think we all have bad days, any help i can give let me know, if you want someone to talk to how about a pen pal, perhaps me,

  • l sometimes feel like giving up then l think of my children,and l just pick myself up and get on with it

  • We all get like this it's hard sometimes but it's true there is always someone worse off or at least this is what I tell myself now it's the only way to get through I'll be ok hope you feel better soon ๐Ÿ˜Š

  • Hi Damon your not on your own pal talk to your gp about something for anxiety or review your meds at least try and get help with the dark moods tomorrow is another day ๐Ÿ™‹๐Ÿปโ€โ™‚๏ธAlan

  • Thanks Alan i will go and see my GP this week xxx

  • Go to a Pub Damon, AFTER you see your Doctor ! Chin up !

  • Good idea that

  • Thanks xxx

  • Hi Damon. I hope your feeling a little bit brighter this morning.

    I agree with Alan, I think you need to see your GP as soon as you can for help with your low mood. If this feeling is a one off, then that's different but, you do sound rock bottom and it will only get worse without help.

    I've suffered with depression for over 30 years and my poor health has added anxiety to it.

    I strive to be upbeat but, it's an uphill struggle with the occasional, slip back down the hill.

    When my mood is lighter, I do think to myself, there are loads worse off than me and it does kind of, make me for grateful for being more fortunate, but, when I'm really down, even knowing that, is no consolation, and I know I need to see my gp.

    Over the last few years, I have finally realised it is pointless, ever expecting anyone to understand what your going through, because, unless they have it too, you are wasting your breath. No pun intended. That goes for any debilitating illness.

    Loved ones, can't see how we feel.

    It hurts and frustrates us, because we can't do the things we used to do, but, they can't see that either.

    Instead, we have to learn to be selfish and only use our energy, to do things to help keep ourselves well.

    In the meantime,we're here fir you if you want to have a good old rant, at least you can get it off your chest. Take care xx

  • Totally agree....๐Ÿ‘

    Nobody really understand unless they are suffering themselves.

    When u have a chronic illness sometimes you can't see a light at the end of the tunnel.

    Enjoy the good days and fight through the dark days xx

  • Thank you xxx

  • Hi Damon, I'm in the same place at the moment. After the last infection I don't seem to have recovered as well as usual and it's resulted in a really low mood, falling out with the people who support me the most and generally just had enough.

    I saw a different GP about this 2 weeks ago and the guy seemed to get what is wrong - he's suggested "talking therapy" ... it won't get rid of the COPD but I'm hoping that talking with a professional might help. This new journey starts next Thursday ...

    It might not work ... but it might. When I get down I remember how two of my brothers are no longer here because they couldn't cope - and the sudden pain they left for the rest of us.

    I think the conversation was probably one of the hardest I've ever had because I had to admit my weaknesses and recognise my problem is MY mental health.

    I'm not advising anything - just recognising I'm in the same place and explaining hw I'm hoping to get out of it.

    Thanks for your rant, it reminds me I'm not alone

  • I'm sorry about your brothers y_not .

  • Long time ago, '93 & '84 .... the good old days?

    Thanks

  • Good luck on Thursday tony,I find some of your posts inspirational as I'm sure do others on here,hope you find some inner calm over the weekend.alan

  • Thanks Alan, much appreciate the unexpected comment.

  • It does get very wearing at times. If you can get out and get some fresh air it will help. It takes 6 weeks or more to pick up after infection

    Concentrate on small achievements at home. Set up an event to look forward to a holiday or day out. Take care and hope you feel better soon.

  • Hello Damon1864 .

    I'm sorry you're feeling so low. I know exactly what you mean. A while back I also felt like I couldn't go on. I saw a doctor for my mental health and continue to see him once every three months. Although I am better, I still have some really bad days. Being chronically ill just brings so many challenges.

    Like many people here I try and stay busy. And I think I'm doing okay. Then all over a sudden I turn a corner and without any warning there's a solid brick wall there. Of course I crash straight into it and land on my back. I lay there for a good while until I can sit up, then stand up again. This is how it feels to me anyway.

    Please know you are right. At times it is just totally awful. But remember you aren't alone. We all care about you. I think the visit to the doctor's will help. Please do let us know how you get on. Thinking of you.

    Sending a hug.

    Cas xx ๐ŸŒฟ

  • I know the feeling, have adult schizophrenic son and many associated problems, am a widow, severe COPD, family not interested because my son is an embarrassment to my family.......could go on and on and many times contemplate 'walking away' but.......we all have reasons not to do this.

    Hope you feel less despair soon.

    Annie

  • Hi damon...u can relate to what you are going through..i have c.o.p.d...im not tobad at the moment..taking my meds..i have come through a lot of hard times..being married to an alcoholic..i had 5 children all grown up now...i live on my own im 75...fairly active..well up to 2 years ago when i got this...but i am a christian and if you would allow me to i would like to pray for you......keep your chin up pat...

  • Reading the initial post and all the replies made me realise all over again what a loving caring crowd of people I`m proud to be a part of. Bless you all, Sheila xx

  • I agree this forum has people who really do care about each other xxx

  • Hi Bernadette, I'm sorry to hear you're feeling so down at the moment. I hope being able to discuss it here will help to take a little of the stress out of your head and onto the page. i'm not sure if this is just something that's been building up for a while or if there was something specific that triggered these feelings. It's hard to be cheerful all the time when you're struggling with chronic illness. We all try hard but nobody can keep it up constantly. I think it's amazing that you manage to study and do well in your exams, despite not being well. I hope that when you get back to your next module, that it might help to raise your mood. Sending you virtual hugs and hope you feel better soon.

  • Hi Damon I'm sorry you are feeling so down. Hope you are soon feeling a lot better. From one Co Durham girl to another. ๐ŸŒธ ๐Ÿ€ X x

  • You are not alone Damon.

    It's not only a physically challenging living with a chronic illness but equally mentally challenging.

    As the lovely people who have left comments said you should seek help from your doctor, you are not weak, so many people feel the same way, if was brave of you to write you post.

    I think people living with a long term illness should automatically be offered coping strategies and other help if needed.

    Hope you are feeling a bit better xxx

  • Thank you all for your support and advice it means so much. I will be seeking help on Monday and I think it's time to go back to pulmonary rehabilitation I meet lots of lovely people there so won't feel isolated.xxx

  • Greetings

    I think that everyone has said pretty much everything. Going to see your GP and having meds to attack your depression is essential: in our case, the depression is probably caused by a deficiency of serotonin in the brain and with the best will in the world, we can't overcome it!

    Exercise will help to lift your mood too, however little you do. The more you do, the better you'll feel.

    The bottom line is that you're stuck with this horrible disease and everything that goes with it so you need to adapt your lifestyle to cope with daily duties and longer term activities. Sleep is important too.

    Hope that your GP is helpful; put a smile on your face - it fools everyone and they smile back!

    Cheers

    Catnip

  • Hello Damon, sorry to hear that but you are not alone in feeling this way, we all have a feeling of hopelessness at times. I went through a similar stage of feeling very low, don't take much to make me feel as though there isn't any hope, especially when you want. To do something and yet knowing you can't and that is the worse feeling. I went to see a therapist about my anxiety and that really helped me. Of course. i do still feel hopeless ๐Ÿ˜ฉ at times and have to think of the many who are worse off than me. My son passed away just a month ago and it has left me with that feeling of anxiety again. My doctor put me on amatriptoline to help me sleep and relax, it has helped but today would have been his Birthday so I felt down again but then my phone rang and good news ..... my granddaughter has just given birth to a baby ๐Ÿ‘ถ son. There is always somthing to be joyful about and then you see the light at the end of the dark tunnel. So Damon, I hope and pray that you see that light and soon are able to come out of that feeling of hopelessness. We are all here for one another so whenever you feel the need to rant on, rant away, it helps to know others feel the same and know you are not alone. Sending Love and ๐Ÿ™ Take care. X

  • I just found out that I have mild emphysema and my GP didn't feel it was very important so he didn't even tell me till I requested a copy of the report from my CT. But he doesn't understand how bad it runs in my family. My father and mother both died from it. I lost 2 brothers to liver cancer. One sister to lung cancer. I have another sister with moderate stage emphysema. I've never smoked and this bothers me. I know how bad it can be so I feel for anyone with any problem not being able to breath good. Just be strong

  • We know how you feel , I think pretty much all of us have had the same problem, my moods are all over the place, one minute I am all buoyant next min I am down and feel totally fed up, sometimes it's the Meds we are on. I am 64 and I get really angry that I can't get the answers I want or annoyed that I can't do what my grandchildren want me to do, but as my grandson said to me the other day. Don't Worry grandad I will always help you. I know there are always people a lot worse than us ,I know I rant and rave on this site but believe me they are all a wealth of knowledge and will help us all.

    Ps my grandson is only 6 yrs old he has adht he never forgets any conversations we have.

  • I think having a rant often helps. I do try to have positive thoughts, but just sometimes I wonder why me? If I were to come back in a future life I would make sure I drink plenty, smoke, party late and wear high heeled pointy shoes! I did none of these in this life, but I have severe rheumatoid arthritis, uncontrolled asthma and bronchiecstasis!

  • I am so sorry that you are feeling so bad. I know things going wrong and feeling unwell can bring you down but please go to your doctor and let them know how you are feeling. They will be able to get you some help. Also see if there are any support groups you can join. Please don't give up x

  • Was going to see my GP Monday but I've ended up in hospitalxxx

  • Are you ok? Can we help at all. Hopefully you will get the help you need now. Stay strong and know we are all here to support you xx

  • Thank you all so much, your support means everything to me cxc

  • I know what you mean thank you xxx

  • How are you today Damon. I'm sorry you've ended up in hospital but hopefully you'll get there help you need.

  • Feeling a little better thank you. Being pump with antibiotics xxx

  • Hi Damon, well at least you know why you felt so low if you've had to hospitalised and pumped with antibiotics. hopefully, you'll be feeling much better soon., but, don't cancel the planned visit to the doctor's, will you? It's still worth going to get some help with your mood, if only to help put you in a good place for the coming miserable winter months. xx

  • I will certainly be going to the doctor i do hate feeling like this. Thank you for your concern . I will let you all know how I am xxx

  • Damon 1964 . Keep strong I do know how hard it is & can get today today I feel the same just giving up . But hey ho as sad & as gutting as it is we have to keep going & pull on the inner strength we all have to pull on as reserves for bad days so keep so as I talk to myself to remain positive I say it to you positive with a pat on the back to you & a hand shake & say come on mate you be ok & get there xx ๐Ÿ‘๐Ÿป Keep smiling ๐Ÿ˜˜ Bernadette x

  • Damon please know that everyone who suffers from a serious illness all experience times like this. When I'm feeling my worst I often think I just don't want to go on like this but as hours pass by and my symptoms calm down I start to feel better. I now know that these feelings are temporarily and I just have to push through it. Just know that we hear ya and your not alone. P.S. Try to stay positive ๐Ÿค—

  • Hi Damon 1864, I know this Post and all very Helpful replies where from 2 months ago. I hope now you are feeling, and Coping well. I only had this Depression once, a few weeks ago, My Doctor and Hubby were great. I now have Phone Numbers next to my Phone and installed in my Mobile , Just Incase, So far I have not needed to call them. Bless You Damon. XXX

  • Hi , yes I'm doing ok now thankyou. Just hit a bit of a dark patch but ok now. Hope you ok. Love Bernadette ๐Ÿ˜ณ xxx

  • Hi Bernadette, Glad your ok now, I'm good thank you. I'm still on the list which is great. I Live in Nottingam Also, small world...Another Small world when I got chatting to another Friend on here, and They also lived near to me in Spain a few years ago now..Yes, the World is Small. Take Care Bernadette. Caroline XXX

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