copd rant

i am 34 years old and i have had extremely severe copd for the past ten years. i have also suffered through severe asthma all of my life. both of my parents smoked, and they would smoke INSIDE of our house too. then, I started smoking when i was 15 too. i remember how hard it would be to breathe, but i would still do it. i started being rushed to the emergency room at least twice a week, and at some point, i was literally always in the hospital. then, i finally got diagnosed with copd. i remember when i was little, how i was always embarrassed about wearing a nebulizer mask in the HOSPITAL, but now, i have been wearing an oxygen mask 24/7, for almost a whole decade. i feel so depressed. i still struggle to breathe. my copd has gotten AWFUL. and i literally don't have enough air in my lungs to talk. i have somebody who lives with me, because i need them to take care of me. i feel so embarrassed though. i never get out of my house, because i can't walk without having extremely difficulty breathing. i don't have enough air in my lungs. and what i hate the most, is that the person who takes care of me, MAKES me sit down, and "practice deep breathing" for three hours, with my oxygen mask on. i feel embarrassed doing it.

i am just really depressed and i literally cannot do anything else. this sucks.

6 Replies
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Hi sorry ya having tough time IF you cant talk should you not be taking antibiitics.

Do sympathise with your situation found your self in ONLY thing i can say really.

Pierson might be geting you to deep breath to buld up tolarace and keep your Stomach.Muscle active.

My lung doctor told me to deep breath so use part of lung not damaged.

I would try chanel anger to something more posative and try get out house.

Nearly forgot i would not be embarised is what it is really

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Hi strugglingtobreathe, you sound really peed off, thats how this disease gets you. Do you not use a wheelchair or mobility scooter to get out.?, you are awefully young to be stuck at home all day. Do you not get PR as you have been on oxygen for many years.? The deep breathing is aimed at expanding your lung capacity, so please don't give up it should help you to breathe easier afterwards. Don't be embarassed about your mask lots of people go out with tubes and masks on, but you may find it awkward at first till you can accept its for your good not those who stare. You should have a social worker to advise on these things, PR can give an ambulance car for you to get there and back. You need counselling for the depression too by the sounds of it, your independence is vital even if only for a short time each week, you and your carer need a break from each other. Macmillian nurses can sometimes help as you have a life changing illness like most of us on this site. Hope this gives you a different outlook on your disability and some light at the end of the tunnel. Your life will be different but you ought to be able to get out for a short time or maybe someone visiting you besides your carer. Fingers crossed things can be changed for you xx

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Wonderful advice. It sounds such a sad situation at just 34.

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I'm so very sorry for your situation. This disease really stinks, doesn't it. My husband has severe COPD and he gets depressed about how his life used to be sometimes. And it took him a bit to get adjusted to having oxygen 24x7. He was embarrassed to go out with all the tubes and machines as well. He's a proud strong man and this all makes him feel weak. But, that being said, he's accepted it and now doesn't give a fig if others look at him when we are out. This is your life. You might not be able to change the illness, but you can change the way you look at it. I'm not saying it's easy, it's not! But you are a unique individual and you deserve every happiness you can find. Gentle hugs!

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You are so young and to be suffering so much each day must be really hard for you. People on here have given you such good advice, i really think you should listen. As Katie said your carer is trying to help but you may need a break. Can you get a respite break away from each other?

You sound very down in the dumps ( understandable) you should talk to your doctor to see if they can give you something to lift your mood, maybe then you would be able to fight back and stop this awful disease from spoiling your life.

Sheila1kerry

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I'm sorry to read your so young and suffering like this.

Katie's post has good advice.

Depression is something that needs attention asap, the sooner it's caught, the quicker the recovery.

I have a friend that goes into McMillan respite, now and again. They help you exercise too, which can make a huge difference.

I know deep breathing is known to strengthen the diaphragm and lungs but, 3 hours seems far too long. I start to feel a bit lightheaded and a bit panicky after just a few minutes. I'd be checking if 3 hours is recomended.

I really hope you get the help you need. It's so unfair on you. xx

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