Hi all. I'm back.

[Sonsafc]

Sorry for not posting of late. My close friend Lynne passed on the 24th April. I spent the week prior to her demise sat at her bedside 24/7. Then helping her hubby and family arrange the funeral. Which was yesterday. Today I wake up feeling numb, my emotions are all over. Its my sister's 50th birthday today and expected at her party tonight. Also its the 35th anniversary of my daughters death. Her name was Lindsey Louise, it was a cot death. Lynn's sisters want me to go for a meal with them this afternoon. I feel as if everyone wants a piece of me, and I've nothing left to give. I'm drained and need some time to find peace within. I'm disappointed in myself too, as I have been smoking to help me through this difficult time. Life is never straight forward for anyone, however I hope for some normality. Hope you all are feeling better than I do today. Get my cardiograph results from cardiologist on Monday. Then my copd nurse will refer me for PR. Thank you for reading, just wanted to share my thoughts with you all.

[Hidden]

Hi Sonsafc, I know exactly how you feel. When my husband died August 16th 2015, very suddenly ( although he did have a very rare Lung Condition ) for various reasons we couldn't have his funeral until September 8th. Our children were fantastic & one or other was with me until four days after the funeral ( neither live nearby. ) You put it so well when you say you need time to yourself to find peace within. That's exactly how I felt. Be kind to yourself & say how you feel - I'm sure everyone will understand. Take care, Helen. xx 🌷

[Sonsafc in reply to Hidden]

Thank you Helen

[sassy59]

Thinking of you at this very difficult time Sonsafc. Don't run yourself ragged trying to please everyone else. Take time out for reflection, you have a lot to deal with right now.

Peace to those you have lost and love and hugs to you. Xxxx

[Sonsafc in reply to sassy59]

Kind words Sassy, thankyou.

[Bronagh2015]

Politely but firmly tell everyone that at the moment you desperately need some time to rest and be alone with your thoughts, you really need to look after your own physical and mental health now. I'm sure they'll understand but if they don't it's not your problem. Take care, Bronagh.

[Sonsafc]

Chrs Bronagh, you are probably right. I do not want to let anyone down. However I feel as if I'm drowning at the moment.

[Time_2_drink]

Sonsafc do what you think is right for you

[Caspiana]

Hello Sonsafc .

((Gentle hug)) You have been through the wringer. I know that feeling of everyone wanting a piece of you. I often felt that way too. And I realized after some soul searching , that is because I continued to give pieces of myself freely. And the more you give, the more people tend to take, the more diminished you become. You must look after you now. You've been through a hellish time and Lindsey's anniversary must be a difficult period as well. I think it's quite all right to explain you aren't up to going out at the moment but will when you feel better. Be kind to yourself. You so deserve it. As for the smoking, tomorrow is another day. It's okay to mess up sometimes. We all do in one way or another. We are after all just human.

Sending you much love.

Cas xx 💜🌿🌿💜

[Sonsafc in reply to Caspiana]

Ah thank you Caspiana. I know you are right in what you say. However its tough as I'm a natural doer and giver.

[Fabgran]

🌷🌹🌺🌻🌼💐😘

[Billiejean_2]

It's been a hard few weeks for you. Hope you get the time you need to grieve.

[Ergendl]

(((hugs))) Sonsafc . Take time to let yourself heal, as much time as you need. Sometimes it's right to set your boundaries and say "No".

[katieoxo60]

good morning Herlen, sorry to hear of your freinds passing, you must now take time for yourself before your own health suffers, say no it won't hurt anyone. Take care xx