want to dissappear for [mothers day ] can,t cope with the emotional stress and everyone just upset angry
not been out all week so isolated and lonely been crying alot i have no family or friends only my husband and son spend from eight in the morning til 5 in the evening totally alone 2 much time to think missed doctors appointment ?found neighbours cat dead while walking with son 2 school had 2 comfort him etc,
not been 2 well since the plursey afew weeks ago so daughters got the the hump cause ain,t been in touch but she nevers hardly calls anyway been so cold wheather not had no motivation to go out and
do the things i wanted 2 fed up want to scream out loud asi am inside ,cuse dont want this c.o.p.d taking what time and energy i got left away its not gonna win cause allready lost 2much.went on the depression
alliaince blog [as recommend]but it frightend me v.dark and scary but really needed 2 talk 2 some as i am
feeling really tearfull about my son but to ashamed and embrassed and everyone blames me and turns there back one me asi fully understand its there right 2 ,even my own daughter but as a parent your a parent 4 life so bladly want to give up smoking but its my crutch and keeps me sane [if that makes sense]
trust me i not a bad person and trying to do the best i can but no one really listens they hrer the what im sayig but not listening theres a workshop 0nthe 17 at my local church onhelth and wellbeing etc,
try to go 2 that but dont think they really want someone like me there thats way i not been for 2yrs .
so desperate and lonely eyes are stinging with holding back the tears husband about at the moment?
putting so much time and energy into trying to be normal and get better because of my anxiety i cant travel etc, ibeat last time why can,t i now its so unfair should not say that as there is people much worse than me but life has thrown all it can at me 10 yrs espicially inthe last 5 yrs to last me a life time and cause of my copd had 2 give up my vounterly work which i loved and i miss it so much
so 24 hrs to go and i have no where to go dont want the emotional pain of the day hope all you lovely
kind people out there have awounderfull day and stay happy and healthly and life is kind to you all