Up half the night or so it seemed...Himself had bought that feckin' horrible cheap tinned food for the dogs again...told him not to, but will he listen...
It doesn't affect Eilis...she just lies next to me snoring her head off and twitching occasionally...but Bobby and Millie get the runs.
And they need to go outside now this minute otherwise there'll be a seriously disgusting mess to clear up...never mind the stench.
I buy proper Indian incense sticks from the supermarket because they don't interfere with my breathing...bet we get through half a dozen a day when the dogs have Butchers Choice for supper...not, I add hastily, because they poo on the floor in the daytime, but because their bottom burps have to be smelt to be believed.
I can hear you wondering why we don't sling the doors and windows wide open...'cos of the kittens you see. It's a big bad world out there and I want them to wait 'til they're older before they tackle the great outdoors...having the sitting room window open doesn't make much difference to the smells.
If they aren't desperate for a poo, they throw up instead...sometimes they do both...
Himself lies on his side where his deaf ear is outwards and his reasonably good ear is pressed into the pillow...I shout from the settee...shout again...wait a second or so...shout again and have a coughing fit and then need a wee and either Bobby or Millie, or sometimes the both of them, are standing by the door with their legs crossed looking pitiful...Himself finally wakes up and comes through to let them out.
I don't do the doors you see...we have a sort of lobby built on the back of the cottage which has seriously dodgy doors that try as I might I can't get to grips with...the locks and bolts are weird and rusty and there's often enormous green slugs sliding across the floor...they slurp down the chimney. Used to be a wash boiler in there. I think.
Can do the front door...that's not a problem...but I don't want shitty heaps out the front thank you all the same.
Going into the bathroom means that Mollie whizzes past me into the sitting-room at a hundred miles an hour while Murphy opens one eye and goes straight back to sleep...
Bobby sees mad axe-men out among the shadows and begins to bark so that sets Millie off and the dogs next door that way, and the other dogs the other side and sometimes you can hear Marys German Shepherds begin to howl and they live a mile away. As the crow flies.
Then a car goes past and that makes them all bark again and my neighbour will say it was drug dealers and the neighbour on the other side says it's a courting couple and 'god love them, there's few enough places to go for a bit of how's your Father...'
Mollie is sitting bolt upright on the table...the dogs come back in again and Himself makes me a nice cup of tea.