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British Lung Foundation
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Been so scared to ask

Hi I have been told after all the years of looking after my son 24/7 and being told all the time I went to docs that I have panic attacks and anxiety because of stress ..................when my son passed away 2 years ago I was then told I had copd my lungs are that of a 85 year I have been so scared to ask what stage I'm at ect please someone can you explain this xxxx

6 Replies

Hi Sandy, Welcome to the forum you will find people are kind, helpful and knowledgeable. It sounds like you had a really hard time in the past few years. Good on you for looking after your son, but it sounds like you may have neglected your own health a bit- easily done under the circumstances I think. I am sorry to hear your son passed away that must be very touch for you. Regarding the lung age, that is deduced from some of the values that were measured in your lung function test. Do you have a copy of the data you could post it for people to have a look and comment? However, those are just numbers what really counts is how you feel and what you do to manage your health. Have you stopped smoking if you are a smoker? Do you exercise each day a bit more than the day before? Do you eat healthily? Avoid infections, strong smells/chemicals/dusts/fumes? Do you make sure you don't lack essential vitamins like Vit D? Have a strong immune system? Get annual flu and pneumonia vaccinations (only once required)? Best wishesxxxx


Really sound advice from Jenss ....have you tried phoning the BLF helpline....they can advise you too.

Take care and keep in contact



I'm really sorry to hear about your son. You've been given great advice from Jenss. Don't get hung up on stages and lung function, we all cope differently depending what is exactly wrong. Whatever you'll get brilliant support here.

Kim XX

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I thank you all for your kind words .............I think what scares me the most is I've always helped others my son fromantic the day he was born till he was 28 and yeah I felt tired but well ......and now I find myself feeling I can't do all I use to even going for a shower or walk ......house work its just so tiring and haven't got energy for me it's frustrating and I'm not usually one for complaining ..............trying to get appointments with doctors ect is a nightmare xxxxxx sorry girls for babi🆖 on and think you again


Morning Sandiwilson, Oh my goodness firstly my deepest sympathy to you.

My husband suffers with severe COPD and has done for years. But the good news he is still going pretty strong just slowly!! The one thing I have learned from caring is that this is one disease that you need to be proactive about - it seems to me that our doctor is quite happy for us to carry on unless we go and and ask and ask and ask!!

The first thing is to stop smoking - presuming that you smoke which will prevent further damage. There are lots of medications available to help you - my husband takes an inhaler in the morning Spiriva to open his airways and then uses Symbicort twice a day (a combination reliever and preventer) and now uses oxygen when he needs to on exercise (and believe me that is not as scary as it sounds, it actually has given him his life back!).

Ask your doctor if you have a specialist respiratory team in your area - I had to ask and got a referral. The nurses have been really good and it is nice to have that reassurance that you can ring and get advice. ALSO ask about a pulmonary rehab course - my husband went on his first one four years ago. It was fantastic for him - six weeks, twice a week, two hours each time, one hour of monitored exercise and one hour of information. It really changed his life. You have to get a referral from the doctor but keep asking - we were told my husband was too well to go on it to start with it but I preserved - apart from anything else it made him realise he wasn't the only person in the world suffering.

It might be an idea to ring the helpline before you go to see your doctor so that you can be armed with the right questions and they might be able to advise what you should expect from your doctor and what care you should get. You can call the helpline on 03000 030 555 Lines are open Monday to Friday from 9am to 5pm.

Finally there is no reason that you cannot regain your quality of life. Honestly! Take good care of yourself, look after yourself lots of love TAD xxx


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Tad I thank you for the really kind words

...........I had plurisay I don't no if it's spelt wrong but I had that about 15 or 20 years ago which they said scared my lung ...............I've always felt since then I wasn't getting enough air and my fingerz and feet and also 👄 use to go blue but docs all ways said it was just the way I am ☓. ......how wrong they were lol thank you everyone one here is amazing xxxxxxxxxxx


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