I'm a bored smiler

I really am bored as I am not one for sitting or laying around but have no option at the moment, there is a lot I could do but not able because some of the jobs involve causing dust and the others require strength which I am not able to use as to sore on the side, so your stuck with me again. This morning I found some bits for the ladies, all about men.

Whilst creating husbands God promised women that good and ideal husbands would be found in all corners of the world........then She made the earth round and had a good laugh.

A couple lying in bed, and the man says "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world" ... The woman replies "I'll miss you" ...

Q: Why do little boys whine ?

A: They are practising to be men.

Q: What does it mean when a man is in your bed gasping for breath and calling your name?

A: You did not hold the pillow down long enough.

That's all folks have a good day its blue sky and the sun is trying and that's not an April fool.

xxxxFred :) ;)

43 Replies

oldestnewest
  • Dear Fred - bless you, you still find enough energy to start our day with a smile. Take it easy and recover well.

  • How strange I was awake most of the night and now the suns out and I am tired, funny old world. xx :)

  • Lol...love the jokes Fred, you're so funny. It IS boring when you want to get on and you have to rest, but I'm sure it's doing you the world of good. So keep on resting until you're feeling stronger.

    It's quite calm here this morning after those gale force winds yesterday...phew! :-) xxx

  • Good morning Lyn hope you are well love, and pleased you weathered the storm what a wind, I bet some homes lost their fences etc. Its turning out really lovely here now and I want to go out for a walk so just might have a stroll along the road later today as that will not do any harm and I need to get the lung working again in tune with the other one. Have a great day.

    Love Fred xxx :) ;)

  • Yes, a walk will be good to exercise those lungs Fred and a bit of fresh air will be lovely. Try not to overdo it though. I hope the sun shines on you Fred. Have a lovely day. :-) xxx

  • very good fred never mind the jobs you should be doing make the most of it because when you are well enough that's when the work will come to you matey she wont see you sitting around for to long matey so put your feet up and have a read or watch tv matey and relax peter jones queensland Australia psp sufferer

  • sorry fred I forgot about the jokes mate they were very good thanks very much for them matey now don't forget to relax will you mate see yer peter jones queensland Australia take care

  • Cheers Peter will do I have no option really as with 4 women in my life I dare not do as I am told, as one is a nurse and another works in the cancer unit and the other 2 wait on me, yes they wait for me to get better so I can do the jobs. Stay happy Fred :)

  • hi fred only four mate you must be slipping well its been a day of rain here but we needed it badly mate but we didn't need the roads to flood up as well which some have and some comes down as big as cricket balls and thats no lie matey WHEN ITS GOING TO HAIL THE SKY USUALLY GOES A GREEN = COLOUR I WAS STUCK IN MY CAR ONCE IT IS VERY FRIGHTENING WHEN YOIU HEAR ALL THE THUDS FROM THE HAIL HITTING YOUR CAR THERES TWO THINGS I DO NOT LIKE THATS THE WINDS AND THE HAIL BOTH ARE DESTRUCTIVE MATE BUT HEY HO IM OFF TO BED NOW MATEY

    SO SEE YER MATE TAKE CARE SLEEP WELL PETER JONES QUEENSLAND AUSTRALIA PSP SUFFERER

  • Morning Fred, Even if you are a bit restricted at the moment,at least you can still make us all smile and laugh,Take it easy,always best not to rush recovery, Very best wishes, Bulpit

  • Hi there bulpit will behave for the time being anyway xx :) Fred

  • Lovely to hear from you Fred get well soon my love, your sunny outlook still shining through, you are a tonic

  • Its sunny because I have all you lovely people out there, we are all a happy band arn't we xx ;) Fred

  • Morning Fred 😊😊. I love the jokes lol. I can imagine it must be boring for you because it's obviously not the way you are BUT just behave yourself (is that too much to hope for 😉 ?! ) because it will be worth it very soon.

    Jan xxx

  • OK Jan will behave myself now than if it will be worth it later, roll on later lol ;). Fred xxx :)

  • Hi Fred, love the jokes and iss think cough will get a laugh too! Try and be a layabout for the time it takes smis

  • Hi Fred , love the jokes and I think cough will get a laugh too. Try and be a layabout for the time it takes smiley. Love LeeLee. Xxxx

  • Lee Lee thanks for the message, twice in one go lucky old me ha ha , keep smiling xxx Fred :)

  • Hello I'm a bit late soooo relaxed,a good antidote for boredom...Suround yourself with gadgets,ha, Daytime TV amazing what u can find if you have all the channels, study,reading if you have a gadget that u can use in bed,entertainment that's it ,but attitude is so inportant,so if you need to sleep ,your lucky ,I'm sure you can enjoy the rest while u can, before your out causing trouble again. Enjoy .!x

  • Morning there Colours loved the message the more I read it, the more I saw bits that made me chuckle, but then it could be my naughty mind, thanks for being there xxx Fred :)

  • Hi Fred,

    HOpe you are feeling a bit better each day, dont rush it.

    Liked the pillow joke - I must have a cruel streak!

    For my many rest periods during the day, I am always either reading a book, playing scrabble on line, doing a crossword or enigma puzzle or knitting and watching TV. My husband plays cards on line, and is addicted to suduko. Hope you can find something that helps you enjoy resting. Love Iris x,

  • Cheers Iris I will manage as I enjoy drawing mostly cartoons and then there is always something to read on here and I also read alot of old sea faring stories. Stay safe and happy Love Fred xxx :)

  • These are great Fred,Lol just love em,Lol

    You just bide your time take it easy, gently does it.

  • Cheer redted will do pal :)

  • Hi Fred, thanks for the jokes, made me laugh. Writing this but still in bed as i had a bad night. The castle reopens today & we may visit later but see how iget on with stuff to do. You can play chess on line, well i can,t i don.t know how. I am sure you won't be board for long, in the mean time just rest. Love Margaretx

  • Hello there Margaret sorry a bit late getting back but slowed down after a little walk. It seems you are keeping busy but steady as you go and stay safe. xxx Fred :)

  • Hi Fred, The sun is shinning here in Malvern but I'm stuck in waiting for B&Q to deliver some flooring for our dinning room and all I know is it will be sometime today. I wish they could have given me a time so I could plan the day out. You never know with these delivery times though, I ordered some car tyres on Monday and they said they would come Thursday so I was surprised when they turned up yesterday and just by chance I was in. Whew!!.

    Mind you its great that with a click of a button on the computer we can get this stuff delivered to our door without the hassel of transporting it in the car with the rear door wide open and choking on the exhaust fumes. :)

    Look after yourself Fred, keep those jokes coming and don't try and rush that recovery to much.

    Tony

  • Nothing worse than hanging around all day with no idea when they will arrive. Good to hear from you Tony and I will take it steady ish. Hope your order arrived in order. Fred :)

  • Morning Fred,enjoy all your jokes just take it easy you deserve a rest,thank goodness the gusty weather has gone weather in Buck's is sunny with a little wind have a good day God bless naresh62

  • Hahaha nice one Fred. :) You never did tell us how u got on with the nurses? were u on your best behavior this time? xx

  • I must admit I did tease them a bit and got away with it, I think they were happy as the others in the ward were really poorly chaps and asleep most of the time. Good to hear from you again xxx :)

  • Glad you are feeling a bit more chipper.

    Being bored and restricted is not a lot of fun but you'll get there.

    Sun is shinning here too. Well between the showers!

    Thanks for the jokes.

    Sara x

  • Hi there Sara feeling more with it now, we had the sun but no showers and I took a stroll along to the corner shop but that was a waste of time as they had sold out of corners. Love Fred xxx :)

  • Good morning dear Fred, glad to see you are still smiling and making us all laugh on here. You take care and wishing you a speedy recovery. Lots of R&R required. xxxxxx :)

  • Hi there good to be here with you again and feeling better each day just waiting for the wicket bits to get back in the blood stream then you will know I am fully recovered lol xxxx Fred :)

  • :) :) Take care Fred xx

  • Hi Fred

    Just can't stay away from the family. Can you? 😃 Thats a good thing Fred. We're all happy your back and feeling good enough to make everyone smile. Hopefully, your smiling right along with us. Jokes were good and like Leelee says -Cough will especially like them!! Have

    a great day Fred 😊

    Love Rubyxx

  • Ruby it is good to be here with you all and hope to make it each day but will depend on how it is in the morning, but as I was told by Lyn I will take it steady. I do have some more what I call men jokes. :) Fred xxx

  • Hiya neighbour Fred how can you be bored living round here mate? Well ok but the summer is coming and the living is easy.... you will soon feel better and playing golf again. :) xx

  • You are dead right once I am able to get out there on the golf course I will be less bored as with the weather changing for the better I will be able to play as there will be buggys I can use, and meet up with some of my golfing friends both female and male as there is no problem with either sex asking to join you for a game, its the only time I am allowed to play around with a female lol :) xxFred

  • Glad to see you about Fred. I am a bit like you. I was awake all night and now have finally woken up. Topsy Turvy world. Time to get up.

  • High there Ribvan good to hear from you pal, I am alright just had a little set back but nothing like a lot of you have to put up with but still manage to remain cheerful and chat away on here, hope we hear from you again soon . Kindest regards Fred :)

  • Good morning Fred,

    Pleased to see that the soh hasn't waned! Just take it easy and you'll soon be back on full throttle. We missed you while you were away. Good to have you back. Take care. XX :-D

You may also like...