British Lung Foundation
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Idiot Sightings

1. My daughter and I went to the McDonalds check-out to pay our bill and give the clerk a £5, note. our total bill was £4.20. so I handed her a 20 pence piece. She said, you gave me too much money.' I said yes I know, but this way you can just give me £1 back.' Sh sighed, and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so and he handed me back the 20 pence and said we're sorry but we do not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back 80 pence in change. !! Do not confuse the clerks at McDonalds in St Albans, Hertfordshire.!!

2. We had to have the garage door repaired . I rang the company and the man arrived, he told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a large enough motor on the opener.

I thought for a moment, and said that we had the largest one that the company made at the time a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, lady you need a 1/4 horsepower.'

I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4 and he said, "NOO, its not. Four is larger than Two.'

We haven't used his repair company since.

3. I live in a semi-rural area. we recently had a new neighbour call the highways Department to request the removal of a 'DEER CROSSING' sign from our road. The reason; Too many deer are being hit by cars on this stretch of road ! He said "I dont think this is a good place for then to be crossing any more ". STORY from Potters Bar , Hertfordshire.

4. I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked. " Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge ?, To which I replied, " If it was without my knowledge, how would I know ? He smiled knowingly and nodded, " Thats why we ask ".

Happened at Luton Airport..

5. The traffic light on the corner buzzes when the lights turn red and its safe to cross the road.

I was crossing with an intellectually challenged friend. She asked me if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it was for blind people, it signals them the light is red. Appalled she responded. What on earth are blind people doing driving !!! ( And she's not blonde )

12 Replies

Hi malk, I've ran into several people like that in different situations sometimes I just have to laugh other times I get frustrated in their stupidity , especially when u politely try and correct them without embarrassing them and they still think their right. Oh well x Sonia x


Brilliant,and can just in visage all the situations,so funny,Lol


OMG you poor thing here in Southport they accommodate that kind of thing being a retirement town but we still get idiots at the check outs I blame two things lack of education and these new computer tills at least in my days if I had to give change at the restaurant I had to think and get it right the first time else I had to make good the deficit.


Forgot to add try taking a slide ruler with you and give it to the checkout girls and tell them to do their sums on that no doubt they would run from the building screaming manager in tow. :D


What a to-do! Reminds me of when I went to B&Q last year, which is a very large shop . Because I just can't walk all around the place I stopped a member of staff (that isn't easy as there are hardly any walking the floor) and asked if he could tell me where the pails were. He looked at me as though I was speaking a foreign language. After much to-ing and fro-ing he finally said "I don't know what pails are". I honestly thought he was joking, but he wasn't! Finally I realised I should have said buckets. At the till I asked two other members of staff if they knew what pails were and they didn't!!! This is worrying as I am discovering lots of words are not in use any more....but surely pails is not one of them??? Various friends have told me that it is hardly used, but they couldn't believe the staff didn't know what it was. Ah well..... :p :)


I went to a bar and paid them for the drinks only for the bar person to give me to much change. I said you have not got that right! so I was given another £10.00? I said when did the £30.00 Note come out? To which the reply was no idea they don't tell us anything here! I explained the amount was to much and to put it back in the till. The reply took me a step back " So you did not give me a £30.00 Pound note then Thanks?"


Judging from all these idiots you've all met they must be this years' Apprentice candidates :)


That's brilliant..I went into a hardware store and asked where the plugs were as I couldn't see them...the man said we don't have any..I was a little surprised but started to leave, as I did so by the exit there were plugs galore...I took one to the counter and said politely oh there were some plugs! He said oh I thought you said plants!! Like a sketch straight out of a well known TV shown...made us chuckle anyway...he wasn't an idiot just misheard but it was funny. Thanks for the laughs this morning!


Pleased to hear we are not the only ones to suffer these barmpots.

We thought we had the lot around here.



It's all so horrendous I can't even laugh at these stories. :(


lol lovely thank you xxx


I have a horrible feeling they're all


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