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astrel profile image
17 Replies

Hi, can anyone suggest some reading material for my partner, he still isn't getting this COPD . If he tells me one more time to sort myself out I may just up and leave. Thanks xx

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astrel profile image
astrel
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17 Replies
RibvanRey profile image
RibvanRey

What exactly is he not 'getting'?

astrel profile image
astrel in reply to RibvanRey

He is not understanding that I am unable to go walking for hrs in end, go up the stairs as often as I would like and that I get very tired yet don't sleep well at night.

sassy59 profile image
sassy59

BLF supply leaflets and will send any to you free of charge. Maybe he should go to see your GP or specialist with you and have everything explained. Some people are scared to admit there is anything wrong and prefer to be in denial. You could search for information online to and conveniently leave it for your partner to find. I do wish you luck and hope things work out. Do take care of yourself. xxxxxxx

stone-UK profile image
stone-UK

Hi

Ask your husband to walk up and down stairs 3/4 times then ask him to breath through a straw, he will soon learn.

There is very little reading that would make a non sufferer fully understand what you are going through.

RibvanRey profile image
RibvanRey in reply to stone-UK

As Stone says. Preferably after a long run. See Duke's post from 8 days ago. Understanding C.O.P.D. Regards Rib

Louisiana profile image
Louisiana

I do sympathise - my son just doesn't get why I get down sometimes, why I have to inhale quite regularly, why I can't do much these days, etc....to be honest, I think he is afraid of what's coming and doesn't really want to think about it or face it. He seems to think that if I face it, it will go away....ho hum. There are lots of reading stuff but I am sure other people on this site know more about them I do. Take care and good luck! :)

stilltruckin profile image
stilltruckin

Buy a pulse oximeter and show him what even moderate exertion does to your O2 level.

peege profile image
peege

Tell him to:

walk up & down the stairs a few times with a peg on his nose

and at the same time breathing in & out through a straw in his mouth.

If that doesn't show him then wait until he's near the top & give him a shove. P

astrel profile image
astrel in reply to peege

Oh dear a bit drastic but god that made me lol thanks x

My husband is the in denial type. I often glance across at him to see he is staring at me with an anxious look on his face.I have had to stop him from asking me if I am alright if I am having a coughing fit. He drops me off at the Breath Easy group meetings but would never dream of coming in.we never talk about my condition though he does sometimes ask if I have remembered to take my meds.I go with him to every doctors appointments but he would be terrified if I was to ask him to come to mine.In your case I do think you need to tell him at least some of the ways the condition affects you and that it won't get better and some help is needed. Good luck. Joyce

Suzy6 profile image
Suzy6

It does seem to be a failure with some men. Mine pretends it doesn't exist half the time and wouldn't come to the Doctors with me. I'm alright with that. I do get upset when he seems uncaring although I really don't know why he has always hated ill health. He is lucky no PB problems or any serious issues. I'm fortunate my son will and is never impatient or scared to ask questions. For about a year he kept telling me to go to Doctors he was worried about the amount of weight I had lost. His attitude was the early you know the better. Shame I didn't listen. Good luck, I hope you can educate him in accepting your limitations.

btown profile image
btown

Hi Astrel, try nhs online and search for copd, you will find some good information for your partner to read.

T♡

astrel profile image
astrel

Thanks everyone for your help and advice, such a great group to belong to xx

Offcut profile image
Offcut

Your husband does not work for ATOS does he? They have the same attitude. If you cannot see it you must be fine!

onamission profile image
onamission

I read a post on hear about an ambulance driver when training they were told to go for a run then sit and breath through a straw

FarmerD profile image
FarmerD

Hi Astrel,I,m glad it,s not just me!My wife still puts her fingers in her ears when I have difficulty breathing,which is quite often at the moment.Although she does help me a lot and comes to the doctor,consultant with me so she knows how bad it is.She would,nt dream of looking on here though as some people spouses do.Different strokes for different folks I suppose but it does sound as though you need a bit more support from him.Tell him to pull his finger out and man up to his responsibilities and look after you,I hope that is what I would do under reversed circumstances.All the best and good luck.D.

astrel profile image
astrel

Thanks farmerD, I have come to the conclusion he just thinks if he doesn't know it will go away, but it is only going to get worse, I will make him realise one day soon.

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