How to wash the cat

1. Lift both lids of the toilets and add a 1/8 of a cup of pet shampoo, to the water in the bowl

2. Pick up the cat and soothe him, whilst carrying him to the bathroom.

3. In one movement place the cat in the bowl and close the lid - you may have to stand on the lid to aid the washing process.

4. The cat will now self agitate, and make ample suds! Never mind the noises which come from the toilet, the cat is actually enjoying this!!

5. Flush the toilet three to four times. This provides the 'Power Wash' and 'Rinse'.

6. Have someone open the front door of your home. Please be sure that their are no people between the bathroom and the front door.

7. Stand as far back as you can behind the toilet and lift the lid.

8. The cat will rocket out of the toilet, streak through the bathroom and run outside to dry himself.

9. Both the toilet and Cat will now be sparkling clean

Yours Sincerely

The Dog

22 Replies

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  • Lol x

  • Hi Muckster

    Ha ha nice joke. As a cat lover I must jokingly complain that it is catist (against cats)!

    Regards

    Mandy

  • Really curled over that one - cant imagine Malcolm the cat going through with that - really worth passing on xxxx

  • Wicked Muckster! My cat is lounging on the windowsill next to me and at 16 I could not imagine doing that to her but it made me laugh anyway. Try it with small dogs too maybe? Take care xxx

  • Heheh! I wish I could try that process on my dog especially when he's been rolling in something really disgustingly smelly! ( he's too big to fit in the loo! ) ;) xxx

  • That's hilarious - made me laugh. Thank you.

    Any ideas on how to get a cat to take a tablet, I'm stumped!

    x

  • This is very helpful -

    nanceestar.com/CatPill.html

    :D :D :D

  • That is brilliant! Two really good laughs in one day. Things are looking up!

    x

  • :D x

  • :D :D :D

    Love it!

  • Seen it before - didn't stop me reading and laughing again - hilarious! :D

  • Reminds me when we had to bath the dog. In the end we all dressed in swimming costumes and bathed him in the garden. We all ended up having bath with doggy shampoo. Unfortunately we stayed cleaner than the dog as, at his first opportunity, he would roll in cow dung!

  • Good laugh

  • Ha Ha ha!!!!!

  • I needed a good laugh.......thank you..

  • ha haa! Oh this was so funny! I loved it!

  • Loved it!

  • Laughed so much I was in tears!Thanks needed a bit of cheer!D. :D

  • Warning - the cat may never return though!

  • I was delighted to receive these instructions which appeared to be the answer to a problem that had been

    perplexing me for some time. Unfortunately I do not own a cat so I managed to lure a particularly irritating neighbour's cat into my house by tempting it with bits of sardine. I gathered up the trembling moggy in my arms and diligently followed the procedure outlined below with entirely the described outcome. However I do think the procedure could be improved upon in a minor way which I discovered after reflection upon some remarks my unsuspecting neighbour shared with me in a casual conversation over the garden wall some days after the cat clensing episode. It a nutshell he was trying to discover the source of a particularly disgusting odor which had permeated his home around the same time as the aforementioned clensing. I would like to recommend an additional step to the process which should be the step performed bfore the shampoo is added... "Ensure that any solid material in the toilet has been flushed away and that the toilet is apparently free from contaminants in the water." I am confident that this small addition will make the process noticeably more effective. As a naturally cautious person I would not make such a recommendation before trying it out, unfortunately the aforementioned moggy had lost his appetite for my tasty sardines so as I mentioned in my opening remarks I attempted to solve my problem using the same procedure. The problem was how to wash my son's pet rat. I followed the procedure to the letter and finally upon lifting the lid at the end of the process the rat must have leapt out of the toilet bowl with such alacrity as to escape my notice since upon closer inspection I could not find it anywhere. The front door being open at this point as per the instructions I can only assume that upon discovering his freedom after such a traumatic experience he decided to make good his escape since he has never been seen since. I only hope that wherever he has now decided to make his home he is amongst friends.

    With appeciation,

  • I was delighted to receive these instructions which appeared to be the answer to a problem that had been perplexing me for some time. Unfortunately I do not own a cat so I managed to lure a particularly irritating neighbour's cat into my house by tempting it with bits of sardine. I gathered up the trembling moggy in my arms and diligently followed the procedure outlined below with entirely the described outcome. However I do think the procedure could be improved upon in a minor way which I discovered after reflection upon some remarks my unsuspecting neighbour shared with me in a casual conversation over the garden wall some days after the cat clensing episode. It a nutshell he was trying to discover the source of a particularly disgusting odor which had permeated his home around the same time as the aforementioned clensing. I would like to recommend an additional step to the process which should be the step performed bfore the shampoo is added... "Ensure that any solid material in the toilet has been flushed away and that the toilet is apparently free from contaminants in the water." I am confident that this small addition will make the process noticeably more effective. As a naturally cautious person I would not make such a recommendation before trying it out, unfortunately the aforementioned moggy had lost his appetite for my tasty sardines so as I mentioned in my opening remarks I attempted to solve my problem using the same procedure. The problem was how to wash my son's pet rat. I followed the procedure to the letter and finally upon lifting the lid at the end of the process the rat must have leapt out of the toilet bowl with such alacrity as to escape my notice since upon closer inspection I could not find it anywhere. The front door being open at this point as per the instructions I can only assume that upon discovering his freedom after such a traumatic experience he decided to make good his escape since he has never been seen since. I only hope that wherever he has now decided to make his home he is amongst friends.

    With appeciation,

  • ha ha,, its only a joke,,,,,,and a clean cat ha ha,,,jimmy

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