10 things Dozy should not do with an oxygen pipe!

1. Use it as a skipping rope - get too breathless.

2. Sit on perching stool and wonder why cannot breathe - leg of stool on pipe crushing it.

3. Roll it up on the same side as collecting dirty washing - had I got pegs it could have been the washing line.

4. Stick the pipe down the gap in the bath board - shower water ran down pipe, onto floor and through to kitchen ceiling and fused the light.

5. Get roasties out of oven without tucking pipe behind pinny - didn't melt all the way through.

6. Remember it is an Oxy pipe and not a good look to have it coming through a knicker leg.

7. Have it trailing through the centre of the room so everyone can trip over it. Well I have to wear it.

8. Turn over too many times in bed - end up trussed up like a chicken.

9. Get out of the chair, trip over pipe, then feet, fall down, hitting the wall, landing hard. Bruises found where bruises shouldn't be.

10. And finally - do not stand in doorway with 2 full grown labradors on their leads, waiting for hubby to get home to take them to vets. They saw him and dashed to greet them, pulling me along behind. There was a loud snap as my mask and pipe parted company, and I carried on flying up the path. Landed in hubby's arms out of breath. I cannot walk without Oxy very far, but did manage to get back indoors. Not a night for taking the numbers.

Well I have done, what about the rest of you Oxy addicts? Keep smiling D :)

35 Replies

  • Love it and your sense of humour

  • Why thank you kind sir - little curtsey here- flippancy is my middle name. D :)

  • Hmmmmmm you never do anything by half, do you dear Dozey?

    I think the obvious answer is to wrap every inch of your tubing with Crime Scene tape cos at least that way you would see it ;) xxx And if you have some spare, can I have a bit for the door frame please ;) xxx

  • Or every inch of me in bubble wrap, could have a popping good time then. D :)

  • I have another, don't go out into the garden trailing your oxy tubing through the back door as, when someone opens the front door, the back door slams and chops the tubing in half!

  • That one has not happened to me, well I can only get to the back step without moving the concentrators. Hope you had spare tube. Take care or have fun D :)

  • Hi dozy

    That is a brilliant post I have tripped headbutted wall then coughed n laughed n gone bugger

    Ur post is fantastic.

    I no we have such serious conditions

    Struggle just isnt the word some days .

    Hope and laughter gets me through

    Thank u sincerely for ur post. X

    Now number 1 looks like fun. Lol

    Number 2. me sitting backwards over my dinning chair sat upright as possible (hope that makes sense. )looked at him he was like u ok I just kicked his size 12 foot n weight from my line

    Oh no sorry was standing here looking over for the sky remote

    Number 6 had me laughing erm.. less said but deffo x omg after number 19 was u ok?

    I have a tigger cat aged 14 quite a lump who I wake with laying right on my chest.

    Last night I woke 3 times he was paddling n trying to settle

    I had a chat with him today had to explain if he wanted feeding or even let out the next day find another bed lol


  • You sound just like me. My mind jumps around like a butterfly and I keep forgetting where I left it. My smile is always there though D :)

  • had a few near misses with the strimmer....

  • Oxy tube can be replaced, watch out for your toes though. You take care doing this dangerous stuff D :)

  • Love that!! My youngest daughter carries the oxygen on her back for my husband but forgets he is with her and he can often be seen been dragged along as the pipe unravels!! You have really made me smile this morning. Thank you!! xxx

  • Know what it feels like to be a dog on a lead but being pulled along. It looks so funny though D :)

  • Lol.....bless your heart Dozy...that made me giggle.

  • We aim to please, so glad you liked it D :)

  • Accidentally getting pipe mixed up with laundry and putting in the tumble drier!!

  • With you attached? And you went around and around 'til it was dry. :)

  • Having a kitten who chews the line. My line is full of plasters. I have to put it through water checking for leaks. Luckily it's being piped in tomorrow, so less line.

    Kindest Regards


  • You can use the old pipe as a water sprinkler for the flowers, what a helpful little kitten. D :)

  • What a great idea, Thank you

  • Do you ever get the feeling your having a bad day !!!!!!! Brilliant, conjured up a few weird images in my mind though !!! keep breathing (it's bad for your health not too !!!!!)

  • Two things required for good health breathing and smiling, what a simple life. D :)

  • Love it. Really made me laugh, and I can identify with most of it. I'm on 24/7 and at times I get frustrated with it . Feel like a cow tethered up in a field . But hey I'm alive the sun is shining and Ive had a laugh, what more could I want . Thankyou for that

  • Yes, life at the end of a line. But with portables at least it can still be a fun life. Especially in the good weather. Have a good day D :)

  • I am on 24/7 and my friends have given my 02 hose a name "dick" and me as "Jane". We have heard some very funny comments about "dick" in particular.

  • Oh dear Dozy you have been in the wars haven't you? x

  • More like minor skirmishes and I won. The smile does it every time D :)

  • lol lovely thanks - am on home oxygen too so will take heed - luckily none of these apply -------- yet ...

  • Just don't lose too many brain cells and you will be ok. I am a lost cause, however, and like the Cheshire cat will soon have just my smile. D :)

  • Loved reading your post Dozy, had the images of you in my head. :D

    anna xx

  • The best was when I tried skipping, had forgotten how hard it is. Only managed 2 jumps. Then gave in, no - one there to see me make an idiot of myself. Magnum on its way x

  • LOL I gave up skipping about 8 years ago when teenage son wanted to start boxing, I said he couldn't join until he could skip like me haha - Out came the rope, on went the trainers, that's when I realised I couldn't do it anymore. I still never let him go boxing though. Cheers for the magnum, it was delicious. :P

  • Same goes for cutting hedges and mowing lawns'

  • At the risk of being sexist, they are man jobs. I wash and iron. This is because I only wear flip flops and would rather keep my toes. Magnum on its way x

  • Ironing is just as dodgy in flip flops "ouch" hot toasted, flat toes for tea, topped with fresh stilton, just in case. Phew lol :D :P :x

    Az & Nin

  • Hi DD, I've had 3 holidays in the last 3 years and each time I've brought home the long oxygen hose that was supplied with the concentrators. Well they wouldn't re-use them so why not!

    I can almost reach the top of the Malverns now without carrying my back pack cylinder, next year and I'll be there. :)

    With your record though I won't be recommending this for you down to Health and Safety grounds. :) Ha Ha.

    Tony xxx

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