Hello to everyone,

I do not expect many of you will remember me, Since Richard (KOTC) passed away in January I have not been in very good health, mainly depression I have not coped very well with it all, I think I may be on the up now,at least I am thinking straight again. I just needed to tell you all straight from my heart how grateful I was for all your support. I will endeavour to use HealthUnlocked even more now that I am getting my head round things. My next step is to try and go out into the world and meet new people.My best and only real friend was Richard,so I hope there are more people like him out there !!!!!!!

36 Replies

  • How lovely to hear from you we are hear to listen too you,its almost 13 years since my husband died it takes time you dont get over the death of a loved one but you do learn to cope .

    your husband.

    was loved so much on this site ,we all miss him take care

    Dorothy xxx

  • Hi

    Nice to to hear from you, drawn inspiration from Richard, and you will be fine there is big world out they waiting for you.

  • Hi I am glad you are starting to feel a bit better now. It does take time. Richard was an inspiration to many of us here and I still miss him. He was a one off so doubt you will meet another like him but there are some lovely people out there so get out and meet them. Take care. xx

  • Hi and good to hear from you. Richard was such an inspiration and brought fun and laughter to this site. I am sure you can meet new people and just take one step at a time. I do wish you well and hope to hear from you again soon. Take care. xxxx

  • So glad your starting to feel a little better. Richard always made me life and gave great advice, I hope you stick around so we can all continue to support you. Good on you for taking control again, I think you might be pleasantly surprised how kind people can be.

    Good luck

    Kim xxxx

  • Hi, It's so nice of you to return to let us know how your getting on, although you are still feeling so low without Richard. I can't help but think of him every time I come on here. He was such a lovely man. He's so missed.

    I lost my partner too in Nov 2011 to lung cancer and I still miss him terribly although the gut wrenching pain has eased considerably.

    I feel lost without him and don't feel like going anywhere now. It's like part of me is missing. But, I'm slowly getting more used to it.

    You'll never find another Richard, but you must be such a lovely person for him to have chosen you in the first place and people with that quality are never alone for long. Take care of yourself. xxx

  • Mrs KOTC, It is so good to hear from you. Richard would be happy if he knew you had contacted us. My husband is terminally ill. I know what is facing me and wondering how I will cope but I have read your message. It made me realise that coping mechanisms will kick in and hopefully I will follow the sensible route you have taken. Big hug from pergola xx

  • (((HUGS)))

  • And a big hug to you too Pergola. Think of you often xxxxxx

  • So glad you've come to see us mrs KOTC, I hadn't long joined before Richard succumbed. He was one of the best. xx

  • Richard was the heart of this forum and is very much missed by us and obviously you feel it a thousandfold. It is lovely that you have joined in your own right, Richard would be chuffed quietly - hopefully we can cheer you up when you're down. :) xx

  • You're so right Scrobbs. xxx

  • No, there is nobody quite like him now on here, but still people who care. I am glad you returned and wish you well for the future. xx

  • It is good to hear from you we will be only to glad to hear from you. I will take time to get over your loss. He was a lovely man. best wishes to you Irene

  • Of course we remember you dear Mrs KOTC - just as we remember and miss your lovely Richard.

    I am sorry you have been struggling with your health, along with coping with dear Richard's passing. I am though happy you feel strong enough now to come and see us again and are now starting to find your feet again and intend to venture and meet new folks. I am sure that is what Richard would want - he had such a zest for life, despite his own struggles.

    Please keep in touch with us - so nice to hear from you.

    Take care

    Love cx

  • Hi Patricia

    Its lovely to hear from you.

    Please come to the site whenever you feel like a chat.

    We all still miss Richard and his great jokes.

    I'm glad your health is improving.

    Keep in touch please.

  • Hi Mrs KOTC. It's so nice to hear from you. We all thought a lot of Richard or King Of The Cocktails as we knew him. He was an inspiration to all of us. I laughed many times at his jokes. I've sadly lost my husband since you've lost Richard so I know what you have gone and are still going through. Please do post again. Xxx

  • Hello so nice to hear from you - your husband was so well respected on this forum. I can only imagine how difficult it must be for you. I wish you the best of luck and I am sure that you will meet some lovely people. With much love TAD xxx

  • How wonderful to see you around, You'll always have Richard in your heart, the love goes on, glad your beginning to test things out a bit, keep coming on here and letting us know how your doing x x.

  • A very warm welcome back to you and of course we remember you Mrs KOTC.

    Your dear husband was always mentioning you and the love and respect he had for you shone through his posts and replies.

    I'm very sorry you've been unwell and sincerely hope you are picking up now. It isn't surprising though really. You're facing a huge loss, grief is a very powerful emotion and leaves you wide open.

    I was wondering, Richard must have been as well loved at his BreathEasy group as he is here. I feel sure they would welcome you if you can find the strength to visit them.

    Perhaps it's too raw yet but I hope you will try one day. One day at a time.

    In the meantime, come on here and keep us company. We miss him very much.

    My very best wishes to you Patricia xxxxx

  • Good to hear from you xxx

  • Wonderful to see your post Mrskotc It is understandable that you have suffered with depression following Richard's death, I'm glad that you are thinking more positive now and I'm sure that you will soon find groups that interest you where you will meet new people.

    Best wishes

    Jo :-)

  • Hello MrsKOTC, There's no doubt that Richard was everyones favorite Healthunlockeder and a sadness hung over the site when we heard the bad news. Even though I only new him as the King I felt a connection between us as I'm sure many here did. His kindness, musical knowledge and humor is missed and he certainly lead the way by example on how to conduct yourself on a community chat site.

    Sadly you are one of a growing number of people on here who have lost their other half's due to lung disease so you have come to the right place for help and support.

    I think the King invented the word Healthunlockeder and its one I often use in my posts in his memory.

    Tony x Proud to be a Healthunlockeder :)

  • So pleased that you have contacted us again and send my very best wishes to you .i am sure I am not alone in saying how much I enjoyed searching for Richards posts. He was a very special person and is sadly missed who's aim was to make others feel a little bit better. Hope you soon find a new circle of friends to help you fill those lonely hours X Joyce

  • Hi I don't think and it sounds like I missed out never new your husband.

    I lost my husband Graham 2 years ago 30 June so it's bringing back that time 2 years ago.

    The first year was awfull I am glad that I am no longer in that frame of mind. Once you start to do things and mix more you will see what a good world out there.

    Only when you are ready no good forcing yourself as you won't enjoy it.

    Lucky I had a good friend as I needed someone outside the family to talk to as the family like myself were still greaving. All the best time does help. :)

  • I think that Richard was a very special person, he certainly made a difference on here so I can imagine how hard it has been for you trying to adapt to life without him around.

    I hope and pray that you have good support from friends and family and can get back into the world soon and do him proud.

    Take care, love and prayers, Victoria x

  • You will have felt like you have taken a good kicking after all you have been through, but there is always light at the end of the tunnel all you have to do is keep on walking towards it. I am glad your spirit and strength has lifted a bit and your heading in the right direction.. chin up girl you never know whats around the corner....Stay Strong X

  • Hi , how lovely to hear from you again although so sorry to hear you are not well yourself . I can only imagine what you are coping with- two & a half years ago my husband was in ICUafter a biopsy on his lungs went disastrously wrong & the Consultant told me that he did not expect him to live - we had been married for forty six years at the time . Happily , after five weeks in Hospital & a diagnosis of IPH he came home & has made good progress . Unfortunately , little is known about this rare condition , other than ultimately it will probably result in a massive Haemorrhage in the lungs which he will not survive , so I know I will have to deal with that when the time comes , but for now we make the most of every day as I am sure you & " The King " did . Just know that there are a lot of people on this site who will never forget him & are here to support you too . Take care - with love Helen .

  • Richard was a good man he give advise when he was able to he is still missed on hear for the ones who spoke to him . He kept hower spirits up even when he was Down him self but time is a great healer hope you get stronger every day like he would like you to and get out more . David 12

  • He was such a big presence... so hard for you. What would his advice to you be now? Wonder if you have had grief counselling ... try cruse if you haven't. You unfortunately going through normal sad process of grief ... final stages being acceptance and rebuilding your life... hugs xx julie

  • Hello Mrs KOTC

    How nice to hear from you. Richard is sorely missed. There were many a day I woke up feeling grumpy and within no time Richard's jokes had put a smile on my face. He reminded us that even with this terrible illness there were reasons to laugh and be happy. That is what he would wanted for you: to laugh and be happy. Good luck with your recovery.

    Kind Regards


  • I don't comment very often but the times I have, Richard usually had a funny remark or nice response for me. He seemed to be a lovely man, well loved and very sadly missed. How else could anyone wish to be remembered? Unfortunately, though trite, it's true to say the greater the love, the greater the loss. I hope you find your way forward. Take care. Gina x

  • Hello Patricia, most of the site know you fondly as MRS KOTC. Thank you for coming back to talk to us all. You have a right to be down it is very hard to go through serious illness of a partner, only to lose them. It is early days and it will take much time to adjust to the loss, after nine years myself some things still trigger memories. Take each day as it comes as you did when Richard was ill, there is no ascertained life path for any of us and take solace that your hubby is no longer suffering and left a lasting memory to us all. Look after yourself and hope to see you again soon for a chat xx

  • I'm so glad you came to "see" us. And As others said, you cannot expect to get over the loss of your beloved friend in an instant. Your life, your joys they are together, in a bond,with you. Have you spoken to Cruise? That's a charity that deals with bereavement.

    Take it easy and mostly take time to take care of yourself. If you need to sleep a lot, sleep! Don't forget to eat! Listen, if possible to some sweet, relaxing music. Love from all of us. Mic. xxx

  • Hello Patricia, it's so nice to come on here and find you have 'posted'! I am so pleased you are going to keep in touch. I often think of you and Richard and Badger, Richard spoke of you and Badger all of the time so I feel as if I know you! :) I hope you continue to feel less depressed and stronger with each passing day. love and hugs, hufferpuffer xxx

  • Good to hear from you again and glad to hear you're feeling better. Richard was a lovely man who made me feel very welcome when I found ite. I think it takes a while for your head to clear after a bereavement and there is a lot of readjustment and emotional loss. The people here are always here for you though when you need some emotional support.

    Take care

    Love Patty

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