I was at the hospital on Friday to see my cancer specialist, he had the results from my last CT scan, he started with the report on my lungs, get the bad news out first, my lungs are not so good, ( I knew this ) anyway he says there is nothing that can be done about them by him, he's not a Lung Specialist, next came the report on my hips, they are fractured, tiny fractures in the joints of both hips caused by the radiotherapy for six weeks. This is why there is so much pain when moving and trying to walk. He's planning on fixing this when I see the surgeon in a weeks time.
Now the report on the cancer, he was smiling now, a bit of a Cheshire cat grin really, he says your chemo & radiotherapy finished last Easter and the secondary tumour was removed shortly after that, we realised that the cancer had not completely gone and we told you that we would have to operate and give you a colostomy bag but you refused, we told you that without this operation the cancer would only come back and be more aggressive and spread further, well I'm glad to tell you the scan shows that it has NOT done what we predicted, your body is now fighting it really hard, it has not regrown the size remain the same !!. They are surprised by this but not displeased by it, I am to have another scan now to make double certain of this.
He figures my body is fighting and using lots of it's energy fighting the cancer in my bowel and prostate that it has nothing left to keep my lungs strong and my heart is under massive strain due to my breathing problems.
I think hey, if my body can fight the cancer and keep it at bay, it will win !! then it can concentrate on the other things, I am going to get fitter and stronger, I am going to bounce back one day and be fit ( ish ) again, so even though I've been in bed asleep most of the time since I got home on Friday I woke this morning to a glorious day of sunshine, I feel good in my self for a change, It fees like a corner has been turned and a great weight has been lifted off me, now to get that feeling and turn in to building my body back up and getting some strength back.
I wanted to share this with you all, you are all facing problems like me but if there is a light at the end of the tunnel for me I hope with this post I can share that light with you and turn one on for you all to.
Take care folks and stay strong !!