Hi all. I have just got brave enough to post on here. I thought I would tell you my sad news that my beloved Husband died on the 28th February. We knew his condition was critical but thought he had a few more months. Sadly it was not to be. His Funeral was two weeks ago. I will miss him forever. X
Sad news: Hi all. I have just got brave... - British Lung Foun...
I am so very sorry to hear about the death of your husband. You must miss him tremendously.
Just remember all the many happy times you have had together.
Take one day at a time.
My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Awe sweetheart I am so sorry to hear of the passing of your dear Husband. My heart goes out to you - sincere condolences to you and to all your family and friends. I wish you strength whilst you grieve. You must have so many wonderful memories of the times you spent together and no one can take those away from you.
Hi Mav.So so pleased you have posted,i was wondering how you were coping at this sad time,it's an old adage but time can be a great part of the healing process.I sincerely hope you will keep in touch with us on the forum as your posts were always helpful and informative.I myself am going through a sticky patch at the moment,just finished a two week course of ab,s through I'vs for the bug pseudomonas but I don't think treatment was successful and am awaiting results of sputum test.Hope you keep well.My thoughts are with you.love Bengunn.xxx
Hi Begunn. Thanks for your post. I know some of you knew about my Husband but thought I ought to tell the others. Life will never be the same. It can't be. I have to find a new one. I don't know what yet. I'm sorry to hear you have been going through a bad patch. I hope they can sort it for you soon. My Brother in law had a knee replacement and ever since has had a chest infection. Despite three lots of ABs he still has it. They don't seem to work like they used to. Anyway you take care. X
Hello Mavis how lovely to see you glad you felt brave.My heart goes out to you such early days still .With the passing of a little time the pain you feel will lesson and your'll remember the better times that you both shared and enjoyed together.You have lots of experience and Im sure would be a tremendous help for others here when you feel able ?
Really good to see you please dont be a stranger. Janexx
Hi Jane. Nice to hear from you. I'm getting better. Saying that I thought I was brave enough to watch Eastenders last night. It was Nick Cottons Funeral. I ended up in floods of tears and had to turn it off. I phoned the Council Tax people because they have put the wrong name on my letter. The woman I spoke to was awful and had no sympathy whatsoever even though I told her I had just lost my Husband. She was just interested in me paying my Council Tax bill. I asked her how they could assess me when even I don't know what I will get. I've been quite good otherwise. How are you?
It's strange how our emotions grab us suddenly and when you least expect it sometimes,for no reason in floods of tears.there are no rules when it comes to bereavement we have to live it in our own way and understand others for the way they deal with the same sadness. Life sure ain't easy sometimes for us!
As for twisted knickers council tax person! What can I say there always one smooth talking idiot unfortunately ,such a shame they didn't have their listening ears on properly eh. Not nice for you though all the same.
Me I'm not bad just getting over chest infection ,have my 6min walk for PR on Tuesday so I'm hoping lungs don't let me down and my stupid BP behaves,really wanna get cracking with it my brain needs it if you know what I mean needing a little kick start haha!
Well Mavis your doing just as fine as one can be at this time.its good to talk to you.((( hugs))). :). Janexx
Thanks Jane. Nice to talk to you as well. I was a bit nervous coming back. I just feel it makes everyone else feel bad. I have to watch my BP as well. It seems to have a will of its own. Always has. As soon as I hit the surgery it goes up. I'm fine most of the time at home. I've just got nearly over a cold that my family gave me. It went straight to my asthma as I expected. I've just got a bit of catarrh now. I may take my paperwork up to the tax office and tell them I wasn't impressed by the way I was spoken to. I will maybe will lay it on as to the state I was in. They have still got the name wrong despite me telling her. Well you take care. Mavis. X
Hi Mavary I was going to send you a message separate until I read all of the comments and came across this one. Firstly I am so very sorry to hear of your news, I can only imagine what you must be going through right now and although it has not happened to me I can empathise with you. Your memories will help you through this and maybe in the future you could write a book about your memories of him and the things you did. On to the second part, something I am fuming about as I used to be a Senior Local Government officer, your local Council must have someone who deals with benefit claims contact them and ask them to sort out your Council tax payments and anything else that may be relevant. The next step is to find out which Officer is in charge of Council Tax and put in a complaint about this person's attitude, I am sure it is not something you wish to do right now but we pay their salary so why should they be allowed to treat us in such a way. I had an unfortunate experience with my local Council when I moved here and spoke to a senior Officer, they now treat me with respect - well to my face anyway. Ok that is my rant over I will go back to my corner now lol.
Thanks SecondLife. I couldn't believe the woman I encountered at the Council tax office. The trouble is I was not up to dealing with someone like that. I only rang really to tell her they had the name wrong. I have received another letter since and the name is still wrong. It just goes to show she wasn't even interested in what I was saying. I will be doing something about it. I may even take my son and paperwork up to make a complaint. If I can't do it my son definitely will. Thanks for the rant it has made me stronger. X
Hi Mavis,lovely to see you back on,brave lady.
I have been thinking of you,it must be so hard,but I know you are a strong lady,
Have you been able to get another car yet? I do hope so.
What an old cow the council worker was,maybe she is going through some hard times too,you never know,but no excuse,not to listen properly.
Take things one day at a time,keep your happy memories,close to your heart,
Big hugs & love Wendells xxx
Hi Wendells. No I don't have a car yet. It's just taking so long to sort my finances. I don't think it will be long though. I am looking at getting a small car that will tuck in beside other ones as I got ours hit the day before I took it back. Nobody even admitted it. Luckily my son got the marks off. That awful woman will not get away with how she treated me. I will take my Son with me and go up in person. If I can't do it he will. It just goes to show how she listened to me. I have received another letter and the name is still wrong. Well we had a lovely day today and I did a bit of gardening. It was 18 degrees somewhere. It was 16 degrees here. Almost summer for England. Take care. Mavis. X
Hi Mavery What can I say everyone is different. It's to early for you to try and adapt at the moment the grief is still to raw. The first year is the hardest as you go over the year before then anniversary of birthdays etc. Have you got a good friend outside the family that can see you from the other side? This helped me going to bed shopping all these things as small as they seem are upsetting the first Xmas I went shopping in Morrisons and broke my heart this time was easier. Sorry if I aren't much help but you take every day as it comes memory's are fine but the remembering at this stage hurts. All my love Rose x
so sorry to hear your sad news. You have been very brave to come on this site and let us know, I'm sure it must have been hard for you to put your feelings into words. I hope the messages you get from the kind people here will be of some comfort. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. x.
Mavary, I have read all these wonderful messages you have received. So many wise comments. You will be able to read them over and over, as you do so, you start to feel less hurt. Life will be different for you, but it will become bearable. You will never forget your husband but the memories will be a comfort xxxx
Dear Mavis, four weeks is a short time for you but it feels an age.
Many of of have been wondering how you're doing any many of us have been through the awful feelings of grief and loss similar to yours. We can't take away your pain but we're here for you.
I do hope you have people close to you who can spend time with you and share the pain and loss. It's one day at a time, one night at a time.
Love, hugs and warm wishes to you. Peeg xxxx
There are so many good people losing their battle with lung disease, I see it on this site, at Pulmonary Rehab, and Fit to breath. To many people who I've met through our shared illnesses and got to know have now gone which is making me realise how important it is to keep myself fit and get back on the transplant list as soon as possible.
I cant begin to imagine how things are for you at this time Mavis as I saw first hand how you loved and worried for your husband and I really feel for you in this sad time, your husband was one of the unlucky ones where the IPF progressed very quickly.
My thoughts are with you, stay strong, the pain will ease, even though your world's fallen apart. x
Hi Mavis, Have been thinking of you and your family for the past few weeks, and wondering how you were all coping. So happy to hear from you. Sometimes we need someone to simply be there, not to fix anything or do anything in particular, but just to let us feel we are supported and cared for. And we are all here for you. Take care Nannyb xx
Hi Mavis, Have thought about you many times, as others have said to you time is a great healer, As I know too well , lost my hubby 1998, no illness just passed away in his sleep, leaving myself and son completely devastated,son was 15, I threw myself into my Job, neither of us could speak of Dad,But slowly Very after the 1st of everything, we started to speak of happy times, now he pops up in so many conversations, still hurts but nice to speak of him with others, brings a warm feeling, Accept invitations from friends and family, they will get you through, early days yet sweet, but you will get there, and we are all here for on here. if ever you want a pm just pop on mine any time,.Xxx
Dear Mavary I am sorry to hear your sad news, it is the hardest loss in life to lose your husband or a child. As a Widow myself I feel for you in these early days, nothing can replace your hubby. As others have said cherish the good memories in these early days, they will help you through the sadder days to come. And we your friends are here for you my heart goes out to you xx
so sad to hear your news. Tough time for you. Hope you are getting support. x
I am so sad and so sorry for you. Wishing you the very best TAD xx
Yes you will miss him for a long time Mavary but the rawness will dull Fifty odd years together you probably feel you have lost your right arm. Take it steady. He must have been a wonderful man and your caring was obvious in your posts. Everytime I see your name I remember your post about taking him to Weymouth not long ago. I bet he enjoyed that day. In my thoughts. xx
Hi Suzy 6. We went to Weymouth on the Saturday and he died on the following Friday. Unbelievable isn't it. He had not long been out of Hospital after having intravenous steroids. They told us then he was critical. I think the steroids gave him such a boost he really wanted to go out. I'm so glad I took him. I had it in my mind what was going to happen when the steroids wore off. We went to a garden centre on the Monday as well. The weather wasn't that good at the time or we probably would have gone out more. He really went down the afternoon he died. Anyway how are you? Mavis. X
So very sorry for your news. I lost my darling husband in September and yes i thought he would have a little more time. My advice is that if he was as ill as my husband he at least is now at peace as at the end there was a succession of district and resp nurses and he lost all his dignity....he was on oxygen 24/7. You will get there, but cry when you need to and try and share how you feel with your friends and family. Take care, and my thoughts are with you, and yes you will miss him forever. X
Hi Maincarer. We were told a year at first then when he went into Hospital three or four weeks before he died they said he was critical. I still thought maybe a couple of more months. They said his lungs were closing in. I started pushing him round the house then but as long as he was sitting he said he didn't feel too bad. I think the day he died his lungs closed right in just leaving a little bit at the top. His breathing was really bad for about four hours. So it was quite quick. His heart gave out in the end. I'm so glad he wasn't that bad for too long. It's an awful thing to have on your mind. I was with him and glad I was. You must be feeling pretty much like I am. It's still not long for you. Are you coping ok.