An Irishman, an Englishman and a Scot were sitting in a bar. The view
was fantastic, the beer excellent, the food exceptional.
"Y'ken," said the Scotsman, "I still prefer the pubs back hame. Why,
in Glasgow there's a wee bar called McTavish's. Now, the landlord there goes
out of his way for the locals so much that when you buy 4 drinks, he will
buy the 5th drink for you."
"Well," said the Englishman, "at my local, The Red Lion, the barman
there will buy you your 3rd drink after you buy the first two."
"Ahhh, that's nuttin," said the Irishman. "Back home in Dublin there's
O'Driscoll's Bar. Now, the moment you set foot in the place they'll buy you
a drink, then another, all the drinks you like. Then, when you've had enough
drinks, they'll take you upstairs and see that you get laid. All on the
"Wow," said the Englishman, "did this actually happen to you?"
"Not me, myself, personally, no," said the Irishman "but it happened
to me sister!"