Life after Marriage....................Life in a Nutshell

............Life after Marriage...............................Life in a nutshell

A techie woman writes to the IT Technical support

Dear Tech Support

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to HUSBAND 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slow down in the OVERALL SYSTEM PERFORMANCE, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0

In addition HUSBAND 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programmes, such as ROMANCE 9.5 and PERSONAL ATTENTION 6.5and the installed undesirable programs such as NEWS.5.0,MONEY3.0and ESPN 4.1

CONVERSATION 8.0 no longer runs. and HOUSEKEEPING 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried NAGGING 5.3 to fix these problems to no avail

What can I do?.


The IT Helpdesk responds.

Dear Madam


Please enter command;I THOUGHTYOULOVEDME.HTML and try to download TEARS 6.2 and do not forget to install the GUILT 3.0 update.

If that application works as designed HUSBAND 1.0 should automatically run the applications JEWELLERY 2.0

and FLOWERS 3.5

However,remember,overuse of the above applicatin can cause HUSBAND 1.0 to default to SILENCE 2.5 or BEER6.11.0 Please note that BEER 6.1 is a very bad programe that will downloadwith SNORING LOUDLY(Beta version)

Whatever you do, DO NOT in any circumstances install MOTHER-IN-LAW (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not do attempt to reinstall the BOYFRIEND 5.0 programe.These are unsupported applications and will crash HUSBAND 1.0

In summary HUSBAND 1.0 is a great programe but it does not have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly.You might consider buying additonal software to improve memory and performance.

We recommend COOKING 3.0 and GOOD LOOKS 7.7

Good luck Madam!



Recommended---join Breathe Easy

Details from BLF Helpline 03000 030 555 Mon - Fri 9am 5pm

13 Replies

Excellent, King. Enjoyed that and want to pass on. Shattered tonight. Went to the chemo clinic with husband. Offspring usually take turns but both away. Next door to the Chest Clinic - old stamping ground for me. love Annieseedx

Sleep well annieseed. Love to you

KOTC xxx

Very clever and well thought out KOTC. I suppose it does demonstrate the advisability of trying out as many systems as you can before you opt to buy one!

Cheeky! wowsa xxx

Brilliant KOTC. Is there a husband 1.0 upgrade? Or, do we need to suppkement with something round and blue? :-) :-) Alison

Is that one of those tablet things? Alison

Could be king. I have a blue tablet I am using to type this reply! :-) :-) Alison

Great! Did you forget the trade ins??? xxx

Yep.Didn.t think of that!!!Wndells

Nice one, Your Majesty. x

You are a nice subject Toci

Brilliant - thank you xx

You are welcome my dear undine

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