My mum, a quick update

Thank you all for your comments on my blog from last night, your good advice and kind comments really means so much.

I arrived at my mums this morning to find her gasping for air. After I tried to persuade her to let me stay last night, and her refusal, she decided she would sleep downstairs on the sofa.

She tried to get to her commode and bloody fell, banging all one side of her chest. I could bloody choke her!!!

Called GP out, no infection but 'tight and wheezy', she is already on 30mg of prednisolone, so can't really increase them, but she said to use ventolin nebuliser as and when needed.

She asked my mum if she wanted to go to hospital, and she didn't want to, which I completely understand and accept.

When she was leaving I asked dr if this was the end, she didn't say yes, but said she was very frail.

I think we just have to make her as comfortable as possible now. She is taking 1.25mg of morphine that I can give her every two hours, with tramadol every four hours.

Needless to say, I am staying with her tonight, and probably every other night, until she either gets better or dies.

27 Replies

  • My prayers are with you both.


  • Bless you this must be so very hard for you. I went through similar with my Dad last year. I will keep praying for you both. Take care of yourself and keep us updated xx Julie

  • thanks for sharing this with us and its a very difficult time for you and your mum. i hope all goes well for your mum and of course yourself. stay strong.

  • Oh Val so sorry for this turn of events. I do hope your Mum will recover from the fall ok, its a miracle she didn't break any ribs, thank heavens for that.

    I am thinking of you and your Mum and sending special thoughts to help you both through this time.

    Love and Hugs

    BC xox

  • Thinking about you lots, Poppin. It is really a hard time you are having but it must be such a comfort for your mum, knowing that you are with her. I remember looking after my mother both at home, and when she went into hospital where I was working. It was such a difficult time and emotive time, but you will really be grateful that you could help your mum. I am thinking of you with your mum Big love from Anniexx

  • Thank you, she is dozing now, breathing quietly. I keep looking at her to see if she's breathing, part of me wishes she wasn't. That sounds terrible but you know what I mean

    Val xx

  • Hello Val

    No, I don't think that sounds terrible and I'm sure that no one else here will think that either.

    I used to think the same when my Father was with me. I was afraid to go into his bedroom in the morning - I'd stand outside the bedroom door and listen for his breathing.

    I'll pray that you and your Mum find comfort.

    Love and hugs



  • Thinking of you both and I'll say,a pray for your mum big hugs xx

  • Hi Val, so sorry you are going through this, I went through the same thing with my mum some years ago. Make sure you are looking after yourself as well as your mum. Best wishes. Libby

  • Warmest best wishes to you both. xx

  • Really empathise with you Val. Thinking of you both.

    With love cx

  • Thinking of you both xx

  • Thoughts are with the two of you. x

  • Thoughta and prayers with you both and for the outcome she wants. Keep strong and look after yourself.

    love Tina x

  • Thinking of you xxx

  • My thoughts are with you, love Anna xxxx

  • Thinking of you, I hate this illness.

    Kim xxx

  • Stay strong, and thinking of you both

    Sandra x x x

  • My thoughts and prayers are with you both. Would it be more comfortable for your mum if you brought a bed downstairs, also easier for you to keep check on her. We have a bedroom downstairs and that is where I go when I'm not well, then everyone does not have to run up and down the stairs an I can see the garden. Love & ((( hugs))). xx

  • My thoughts and prayers are with you both at this difficult time.

    polly xx

  • You are such a great daughter. Wishing you and your Mum every good wish. With love, kind thoughts and prayers TAD xx

  • I hope you both had a peaceful night, thinking of you.

    best wishes

  • Thank you all for your lovely comments.

    She is about the same this morning...crap.

    I have suggested a bed downstairs but she won't have it.

    Her and my dad now have separate bedrooms, she has a single bed in one room, so she can have a commode in there for night time. I slept on cushions on floor next to mum.

    It took ages for me to drop off, her breathing was so loud and I was just listening. She was awake at 04.30, and sat on the edge of the bed. She stayed like that until 08.30 when I helped her get up.

    She was just dozing upright from 04.30, she didn't want to get back in bed. She just kept telling me to go back to sleep, so I dozed on my cushions.

    Lets see what today brings

    Val xx

  • Thinking and praying for you and your poor, dear mum Val. As you say, see what today brings. Love to all, xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

  • Hugs x

  • Hi Val, Me and Fran's thoughts are with you and your poor Mum we pray it does not drag on to long and there will peace and no more pain for your mum, But the on-going heartache continues for you but we are here for you anytime, God Bless, Mattcass / Fran

  • I am sure your mum appreciates all the help you are giving her. However like most people she is fighting to keep her independence as long as she can. This can make it even more worrying for you when she wont let you stay overnight when you know it would be better if you did.

    I hope you can come to a compromise that she will accept and that will leave you less anxious.

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