Couldn't resist LOL

Had to tell you these jokes LOL

I know they're rubbish but rubbish jokes sort of make me laugh haha!


Phoned the BLF helpline today.

The nurse asked, "What exactly is wrong with your wife's breathing?"

I said, "She keeps doing it."


After a romantic dinner. I knelt down in front of my girlfriend. "It's really hard to say this.."

"Yes! " She screamed with the tears of joy in her eyes.

...Stupid bitch. I was having an asthma attack.


I've just met an asthmatic vampire, Vlad the inhaler


I'm not surprised that Holland have suddenly got into cricket.

It probably seems fast-paced and exciting if you're high on weed all the time.


How many Brits does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just two actually - one to secure a stepladder, climb it wearing a hard hat, and attach the light bulb - and another to carry out a risk assessment on the operation and to assess whether it is worth carrying on or whether cuts and the national deficit mean screwing in light bulbs will have to be dropped.


Being from Scotland, I love the summer.

It's my favourite day of the year.


koala xxx

19 Replies

  • :D :D

  • Thanks for sharing! I enjoyed them.

  • Hi 5 .... and another tena lady moment hehehehehehe

  • Oh, those had me rolling on the floor. Well done for raising my spirits :)

    Sandra x x x

  • Lovely jokes Koala, do you live in Australia.

    Lib x

  • I actually live in Belgium, but I grew up in London.

    koala xxx

  • Why does the tena lady never post? she is talked about such a lot ;)

  • I think she's too busy.... works all the time, she does ;)

  • I liked those Koala. You will be doing Richard out of a job if you carry on like that.

    Love from Bobby

  • Looking forward to my enforced retirement


  • hahaha they made me laugh, thanks for that. Just sat through an awful Britains not got talent and was fast losing the will to live. Love Julie xx xxx xx

  • Thank you, on behalf of all of us who don't watch tv... I am grateful for your sacrifice - you really are a team player :)

    Sandra x x x

  • Well what can I say. I told you last night I was heroic, testing all that choccie and hot choclate, now suffering t.v.for you too Love Julie xxxxxx

  • Have a box of Maltesers for your gallant efforts :) We are so very grateful for all your suffering on our behalf ;)

    Sandra x x x

  • Thank you so much, I love maltesers. I think that I deserve them as I have just watched yet another screaming kids dancing act go through to the final. I mean I love kids but how many Kids can you suffer I mean watch in the final too many singers too. Me thinks some acts were set up to fail. However I can assure you that maltesers are just the right food for heroes like myself. I am sure there must be a link on a web site some where that will back me up on that quoting facts and figures... Julie xxx xxx xx

  • I am busy creating such a website this very minute, so I feel a share of the maltesers would only be fair :)

  • That depends open to negotiation Did you or did you not suffer, I mean watch Britains Not got talent tonight ?? if so prepared to split 80/20 honest answers only please. love Julie xxxx

    Meanwhile I am still trying to get me head around the email from a psychic who said if I send her some money I will stay in excellent health, think its a bit late for that. Me GP said the other day me prescriptions so long I could soon qualify for nectar points, hee hee a GP with a sense of humour anyway as I know you also like sainsbugs I could share those too if you like.. Love Julie xxx

  • Well I did do half of BNGT (not being the N) so that would qualify for 40% (see just because I failed my math O'level doesn't mean I am entirely stoopid). :)

    ooooooo nectar points - super duper - am saving my points and may be able to buy a whole bag of wine gums soon - exciting or what? xxx

  • very good thanks - anything that makes me laugh really appreciated

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