Oh dear. After spending the past few days fully expecting to be admitted from clinic yesterday I know I should feel relieved that I wasn't. Unfortunately I had a bit if a to do with my consultant, who wants to refer me to RBH, and I now feel thoroughly miserable and fed up. Long story short, Ive spent more of the past 6mths in hospital than at home, and although a new plan was put in place during a 6wk admission in the autumn, Ive not really had a break since then with a few nasty colds/infections etc - at present Im 10days into a really grotty cold that has me coughing almost non-stop, but has thankfully had relatively little impact on the asthma. My cons agrees its the cold causing me problems rather than asthma, but has told me to be very careful and to go in if it either doesn't start to shift in the next few days or I get any worse - as the cough has left me exhausted I know I cannot be too careful as I have no energy left to put into breathing if the asthma should decide to play up, and given my tendency to just stop breathing I would need to seek help very quickly.
Anyway, she says we have just not managed to get far enough towards stability or getting my pred low enough (she had wanted me on 20mg for the winter, then dropping to 15 in the spring - I made it to 22.5 before getting a chest infection in Nov, and to 30 before this cold hit me last week). I feel that Id rather wait and see what happens for a while, give myself a chance to get over this virus and then see where we are in a few weeks time - the brief periods between discharge from hospital and catching the next virus have, while short, been the best I have felt in over a year and I am reasonably confident that I actually would have some degree of stability without making further changes.
I ended up getting upset in clinic yesterday, and am embarrassed to admit that I behaved a bit like a stroppy teenager (Im actually 34) saying I wouldnt see anyone at all if she insisted I go to RBH. I am intending emailing her to appologise and also to try to explain my reluctance to be referred on - I actually really like her, have a good rapport with her, and dont like anyone else making decisions about my treatment as she knows and understands me and my asthma - she even came to see me in A&E last week, saving me from another admission!
Any suggestions or advice?? Thanks