This morning i went to see my consultant (final time as he retiring) i questioned him on my mobility levels as i seem to have reached the point where if i do anymore than this level my asthma is bad for a week after. I asked him if this would always be the case and he was like if that is your level you are doing fantastic better than what we thought you would. Now my level is that on a good day i can manage to walk 150yards to and from local shop in around 45 mins. Without requiring extra reliever.
When he told me this was fantastic was like what?! So now i am left with having to accept this
I was hoping to be able to get back to walking around a supermarket, town centre, the seaside and back to playing sports. Maybe my aims where just too high but all my friends have been saying to me for the last couple of weeks is oh you will get better you will be able to do more soon. And now the answer is no i wont. I am at my best now (well on a good day not thinking of bad day). It is such a big let down! But i guess looking at it the other way, if my consultant thinks i am doing fantastic then i must be i must have achieved a lot! but how do i tell my normal (non asthma and long term condition) friends and family that this is my best and i am not going to get back to doing like them?! It is not like i am being lazy or do not want too, i would love to get back to how i used to be about 4 years ago but clearly my body has been hammered too much so its best is now a lot less.
Thank you for reading i just needed to type it out!