Okay you're all probably gonna think I'm stupid, but I find my asthma really embarrassing. I find it really difficult to tell my friends and family, and have only told my fiancÃ©, my closest friends and my parents. I hate having to take my inhaler in public as it feels like everyone is staring at me. I have on several occasions delayed taking my Ventolin until I could slip away and take it on my own out of sight, and I often seem to need more Ventolin than usual if I do this. Since I got switched to the accuhaler (I don't get on well with the propellant in MDIs and in my opinion the accuhaler is more discrete) I'm getting better at at taking the inhaler in front of strangers (chances are I'll never see them again anyway), but I still find it deeply embarrassing to use around people I know.
I suspect I find it such a problem because I know a very attention seeking individual (not just with asthma stuff but in all situations) who always makes a huge song and dance over using their inhalers. This person spends 10 minutes rubbing their abdomen saying that they're trying to decide if they're having an asthma attack before waving their reliever around like a flag so that as many people as possible will come rushing to make sure they are ok, not to mention ""accidentally forgetting"" to take morning preventer doses on a daily basis so that they can be taken when there's an audience (again inhaler is waved in as many people's faces as possible to get as much sympathy as they can). Most of my friends (even other asthmatics) have got annoyed with this and the other attention seeking behaviours (e.g. stropping and walking out of someone else's birthday party because they weren't the centre of attention) that they just ignore it now, obviously if this person were in any real trouble we'd help, but it's always about getting attention. I guess there's a part of me that's worried that friends will think I'm attention seeking like this person and think less of me. I really don't understand this person at all, the last thing I want when I'm feeling breathless is people crowding and fussing around me.
I know I'm probably being daft I know but it's a huge problem for me and I just can't seem to get past it. Sorry for the moan and thanks for reading
Edit: Correcting typo's and clarification